Local time where you're at. ("Where you're at"?)

No, I’m not gonna bore you with another verse of The One-Legged Man&#153 (grin).&#160 I’m just gonna say that things are busy, I love what I’m doing, and leave it at that.

But I may make a little more use of the Grab-Bag&#153 than I have in the past.

Such as this gem sent to me by the Sibling Unit&#153 (spew warnings in effect):

Ahmed the Arab came to the United States from the Middle East and he was only here a few months when he became very ill.

He went to doctor after doctor but none of them could help him.

Finally, he went to an Arab doctor who said, “Take dees bucket, go into de odder room, poop in de bucket, pee on de poop and den put your head down over de bucket and breathe in de fumes for ten minutes.”

Ahmed took the bucket, went into the other room, pooped in the bucket, peed on the poop, bent over and breathed in the fumes for ten minutes.

Coming back to the doctor he said, “It worked! I feel terrific! What was wrong with me?”

The doctor said, “You were homesick.”

ROFL.

If there’s one thing that pisses me off more than just about anything else, it’s someone who takes a stand for what’s right in our fucked-up society – and then apologizes for doing so.

The Department of Spineless, Wimp-Assed Bastards has delivered up one such individual on a silver platter – and it’s the Congresscritter I just got through defending a couple posts below.

That’s right, Denizens.&#160 Tommy-boy DeLay has caved in to whatever pressure was being brought to bear on him for what he said about Terri Schiavo and the out-of-control excuse-for-a-court system.

House Majority Leader Tom DeLay apologized Wednesday for using overheated rhetoric on the day Terri Schiavo died, but refused to say whether he supports impeachment of the judges who ruled in her case.

DeLay backtracked as White House spokesman Scott McClellan said President Bush considers the Texas Republican, who is battling ethics allegations, a friend, but suggested that the majority leader is more of a business associate than a social pal.

“I think there are different levels of friendship with anybody,” McClellan said.

There are different levels of cowardice too, McClellan.&#160 Your boss demonstrated the worst kind of same when he bended his knee to the fucking swamp rat George Greer – a level of spinelessness matched only by Shrubya’s brother, Jebbie.

Now Tommy-boy DeLay has just about matched that particular brand of wussiness by apologizing for daring to speak the truth the other day about the Backstabbing Bench Bastards&#153 who helped murder Terri.

At a crowded news conference in his Capitol office, DeLay addressed remarks he made in the hours after the brain-damaged Florida woman died on March 31. “I said something in an inartful way and I shouldn’t have said it that way and I apologize for saying it that way,” DeLay told reporters.

Shortly after Schiavo’s death, Delay said it represented a failure of the legal system. DeLay’s statement also said, “The time will come for the men responsible for this to answer for their behavior.”

If that’s the way you feel, Tommy-Boy, then I couldn’t give a flying fuck if you should be tossed out of Congress on your yellow can.&#160 We need congressfolk in Washington who aren’t afraid to stand up for what’s right, even if it doesn’t jibe with poll numbers saut&#233ed by the NY Slimes.

And if you don’t have the balls to stand up for what’s right, perhaps you should step aside for someone who does.

I don’t even have time to tell you I don’t even have time. (sigh)

Okay, now it’s the cat bloggers’ turn to get pissed off at me.

Mheh.

This is courtesy of one of my co-workers.&#160 Sorta reminds me of one of the Apple penguin games… (grin)

Ah yes, the Sunday news cycle.&#160 Time for RINOs – Republicans In Name Only – to perform their weekly rim-jobs on their Demoscummic masters in order to get TV time.

This past week, it was Chrith Thhayth Chris Shays (RINO-Kennycut)…

(Quick, Denizens, name the reference?)

…doing his little bit of Donk fellating for the Assphyxiated Piss.

Rep. Christopher Shays said Sunday that fellow Republican Rep. Tom DeLay should step down as House majority leader because his continuing ethics problems are hurting the GOP.

“Tom’s conduct is hurting the Republican Party, is hurting this Republican majority and it is hurting any Republican who is up for re-election,” Shays told The Associated Press on Sunday.

No, Chrissie boy, what’s hurting the Republican Party is milquetoast asshats like you kow-towing to people like Ronnie Earle down here in Texas and like “Breck Girl” Nancy Pelosi and her honeyboy Dingy Harry Reid in Washington.

Whaddya wanna bet that, if you would JUST ONCE stand up to them, they’d ingest a heaping help of STFU?

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Memo to Chris Muir:

Bite me.

It would seem that – for now – we’ve averted another Terri Schiavo-type murder.

Sherri at Straight Up With Sherri&#160 reports that 81-year-old Mae Magourik, who had been hospitalized with a dissected aorta, then subsequently hospiced and denied food and water at the insistence of her grand-daughter (who, it would seem did not have medical power-of-attorney to have this done), has now been removed from said hospice and transferred to another hospital, fed and re-hydrated.

Yes, I’m keeping an eye on this one – not to mention giving Sherri a higher-than-normal place on the blogroll.

You see, Sherri’s a Georgia blogger who actually possesses a clue – unlike some other Georgia blogger we all know…

Okay, I’m about to offend half my readership, statistically speaking.

If she has the slightest bit of honesty DNA inside that fat ass of hers, Stephanie Dawn Stewart Crager – Her Doublewide Bitchiness – will tell you that the overwhelming majority of housework in that little 1300 square-foot cottage of ours in Forney was done, not by her, but by her long-suffering husband.

Yeah.&#160 Me.

That’s right.&#160 The laundry, a good chunk of the vacuuming, cleaning the kitchen – that was the handiwork of yours truly.&#160 Yeah, she did most of the cooking, and she insisted on cleaning the bathroom – but other than that, if there was housework to be done, I was the one doing it.

So you can feel for the poor sap at the Department of What The Hell Are They Smoking Over There&#153 who brought me this news blurb about the socialist pansy-asses in Spain’s parliament.&#160 Damn near tore his head off over this.

It seems that They Who Cower To Islamonazi Pricks Who Bomb Their Trains&#153 are feeling a mite wimpish these days, and need someone to pick on.&#160 Thus, they’re about to pass a law mandating that men…

…are you sitting down?

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First it was a flu bug, caught during the wildly-successful Texas Blogfest 2005, that laid me low.

Then it was the massive increase in my workload brought about by the closing of the warehouse where my Evil Technician’s Laboratory&#153 was located, and my subsequent transfer to my company’s business office and call center.

On top of all that, a client of mine (from my Side Business That Loses Money Hand Over Fist&#153) had her machine go toes up on her.&#160 It’s only the heart of her business, you understand, and since several local governments depend on her, and the asshats at the *spit* Environ-loon Prick-sucking Agency *spit* can throw her in the hoosegow without the documentation that was on this box…

The point of all this carping is that, in addition to The Six Or Seven Of You Who Still Read This Blog&#153, I’ve promised stuff to a couple others of you that I haven’t yet gotten around to delivering.

Your patience thus far is very much appreciated.&#160 Please be a little more patient.&#160 Your stuff’s on the way, promise.

Just so you know:&#160 I was never that big a fan of Sesame Street.&#160 By the time I became the age of their target demographic, I was already past letters & numbers and was into reading sentences.

Not bad for a two-and-a-half-year old, eh? (grin)

Anyway, I was more into Electric Company&#160 at that tender young age.&#160 However, that’s not to say I didn’t watch SS at all&#160 – in fact, I had a couple of favorite characters.&#160 One of them was Maria – you remember, Luis’ then-girlfriend (now wife, if memory serves)?&#160 Quite the hottie, she.

The other one was the subject of my rant today, that being the googly-eyed blue shag carpet known as the Cookie Monster.&#160 Ate everything in sight – edible or not. (grin)&#160 Known & loved for his trademark signature phrase – “Cooooooooooo-kieeeeeeeeeee”

Well, that bastion of We Know Better What’s Best For Your Child Than You Do&#153, the asshatted liberals at the Corporation for Pubic Public Broadcasting who write Sesame Street,&#160 have unilaterally decided to take our beloved Cookie Monster away and replace him with a lookalike that purports to tell your kids how they should eat – IOW, a further attempt to take your job of parenting your rugrat away from you.&#160 Chelsea Carter of AP reports:

Something must be wrong in the land of Muppets.

Something has been wrong with Public Television&#153 for a while now, Chel.&#160 You mean you’re just now noticiing?

First PBS announced that Sesame Street would kick off its 35th season this week with a multiyear story arc about healthy habits.

Oh, yeah.&#160 A three-year-old is going to listen intently to a message telling him he oughta start eating GrapeNuts&#169.&#160 YeahRight&#153.

No problem there; childhood obesity rates are soaring.

Pray tell, Chel – why&#160 would childhood obesity rates be a problem for you, eh?&#160 Are they all your&#160 crumb-crunchers, hmmmmmmmmmm?

Then I learned of changes that turned my Sesame Street world upside-down.

My beloved blue, furry monster – who sang “C is for cookie, that’s good enough for me” – is now advocating eating healthy. There’s even a new song – “A Cookie Is a Sometimes Food,” where Cookie Monster learns there are “anytime” foods and “sometimes” foods.

“Sacrilege!” I cried. “That’s akin to Oscar the Grouch being nice and clean.” (Co-workers gave me strange looks. But I didn’t care.)

Great Honkin’ Cthulu&#153, I thought the exchange system&#160 diet was bad…

People, we’re talking about a Muppet here.&#160 Muppets don’t go on diets.&#160 They entertain little children (and, on occasion, politically incorrect adults who don’t have their knickers twisted).&#160 Making sure the kiddos eat right is the job of the parents.

Sheesh.

Being a journalist, I did the only thing I knew how to do. I investigated why Sesame Street gave Cookie Monster a health makeover.

The answer would lead me into a world where television producers worked with health experts and politicians

Translated, a place where micromanaging busybody dumbasses are convinced that they Do Not Have Enough To Do&#153.&#160 The most dangerous place for these snotwits to possibly be.

Feel free to go read the rest of the article.&#160 Just make sure you haven’t eaten anything beforehand, lest you…(pun intended)…toss your cookies.

Since I knoweth not whether I’ll be able to rant & rave like I want to today, we’ll start out with something from the all-but-forgotten Grab Bag&#153.

This is courtesy of my sibling unit, who got it from a friend, who got it from a friend, who… (grin)

If you can start the day without caffeine,

If you can get going without pep pills,

If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment

If you can ignore a friend’s limited education and never correct him,

If you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor friend,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

…Then You Are Probably The Family Dog!

Mhehhehheh…

Sorry, guys – yesterday was a beast as far as workload went.

Today doesn’t look all that much better, either. (sigh)

And on top of it all – Comcast threw up again&#160 last night, leaving me with bupkis in the way of a connection.&#160 I’m really starting to develop an unhealthy dislike for those people… (grrrrr)

One last thing…

That link below on the newest poll suggesting Americans didn’t&#160 want Terri starved to death?

Hat tip on that to His Dreaded Punditness, Bluto. (Sorry for the belatedness on that, guy.)

The SpatulaGoddess has a wonderful article here about not harboring hatred for any or all of the Unholy Schiavo Trinity&#153 – Mikey Shitstain, Fellatios the Almighty Channeler Of Old Ladies He Wishes Would Hurry Up And Die&#153 and Georgie-Porgy the Flamingo-Felching Dolphin Humper&#153.

(Can you tell I haven’t quite gotten to that point yet?)

And I understand about Romans 12:19 and 14:10 and 14:12.&#160 I understand that the Lord will repay these three murdering sons-of-bitches royally for killing an innocent woman.

That doesn’t stop me from desperately wishing that I could the the instrument of that vengeance.

I’m not condemning those who are filled with indignation, righteous or otherwise, toward this whole mess. Like I said before, there is plenty of blame to go around. But, now, she’s gone. Will throwing more mud bring her back?

Obviously, of course not.&#160 But if nothing is done – if we go back to our fascination with Michael!!!!&#160 and whether or not he fondled those little kids, or the latest dirt about Brad & Jen, or J.Lo, or Oprah, or this or that – that will be exponentially worse.

To sit there in a spirit of blah&#160 is unacceptable.&#160 This would send the message that “oh, well, we’ll point our nose toward the sky and sniff our disapproval – but really, boys, you do what you want to do, we’d rather not get our hands dirty”.&#160 That&#160 attitude not only encourages more of the same (or worse), it all but guarantees&#160 it.

(Oh, and I fully realize that’s not what the SpatulaGoddess is advocating.&#160 The rest of our “society” – if you want to call us that any longer – long ago attained “comfortably numb” status, resulting in our sense of morality lapsing into a deep coma.)

The question is therefore raised:&#160 How much more are we willing to tolerate?

Some are now talking vengence, not only against Michael Schiavo, but against the judges and the politicians who let her down. No matter how much I long for justice, I can’t go there.

Indeed, we are talking vengeance – because that is precisely what that Unholy Trinity™ royally deserves.

And no person in any position of authority – from that sick swamp fuck George-Porgy Greer to the supposed&#160 leader of the free world who bowed his knee to him – deserves to be returned to that place of power from this point forward.&#160 Whether removed by ballot – or by other means – every single asshole who voted to have Terri killed deserves nothing short of being run out of town on rails.

And then having those rails turned sideways and shoved squarely up their candy-asses.

Go here and read what this nurse has to say about the whole thing.&#160 She covers every point I ever could make about Terri Schiavo far better than I ever could.

We failed her.&#160 We could have should have saved her life – but we turned our backs on her.

That’s&#160 why, today, I’m ashamed of this country.