Well, Denizens, if I don’t calm down from wanting to give Ronnie “Colostomy Bagboy” Earle an early retirement, I’m gonna pop a blood vessel.
So, therefore, we’ll go in the opposite direction and do a “Most Ridiculous Item of the Day” bit, a la  Bill O’Reilly.
Today’s entry from the Department of You Cannot Be Frickin’ Serious™ comes this blurb from Bollywood, of all places, and an Indian director who apparently wants to make a Mother Teresa B-movie.
An Indian movie director said he hopes to persuade Paris Hilton to play the role of Nobel laureate and prospective Catholic Saint, Mother Teresa, in an upcoming film.
“Her features resemble Mother Teresa,” director T. Rajeevnath told AFP from the southwestern coastal state of Kerala.
Yeah, and my features resemble those of Brad Pitt.
In a “round” about sort of way, of course.
The filmmaker said Hilton is on his shortlist after a computer-generated image showed a close facial match between the hotel heiress and the Albanian-born nun.
Why do I get the feeling this guy wasn’t looking at her face?  Y’know?
“A meeting with Paris Hilton is scheduled for the end of April,” Rajeevnath said.
“Ms. Hilton, please to allow me to direct you over to this casting couch…”
The 54-year-old director is well-known in India for his Malayalam-language films, including “Janani” (Mother) — the story of seven nuns who care for an abandoned baby, which won a national award.
Hilton’s prior movie experience includes appearing in a home-made sex video made by a former boyfriend that appeared on the Internet, and parts in several Hollywood B-films.
The blond socialite, who is often the focus of US celebrity gossip columns, also starred in the US reality television show “The Simple Life”.
One can safely assume that Aishawarya Rai wasn’t available…