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On occasion, it comes time to invoke Executive Privilege&#153 and declare a Perfect Football Weekend&#153, even if one of my teams loses.

This would be one of those times.

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Today, November 11th, 2006, is Veterans’ Day.

Memo to all who have served in defense of our country and our freedoms:&#160 Thank you.

Sometime this past week, the hit counter flew past 60,000.&#160 I say “flew” because, whereas I’d previously been averaging 25 to 40 unique hits per day, right now the average stands at 119.

At any rate, thanks to all of you Denizens for making this site what it is.&#160 Even a grudging “yeah, whatever” to the liberal morons who traipse by here occasionally.

Denizens, I’ll try to see past the Red Curtain o’ Blood long enough to do a PFW.&#160 But if a bit of, ah, invective&#160 (fuckin’ Demoscum pussies) should happen to make its way into this post (Asshats!)…well, don’t be surprised, mkay?

It’ll be hard enough to avoid the invective anyway, as I find out that Turner Gill’s UBuffalo Bulls have jumped the gun on me – and gotten their heads handed to them by the Akron Zips, 15-31.&#160 And since I can’t check what the line was, we have to go with the straight result – which means no PFW for yet another week.

(Memo to Turner:&#160 Enjoy your one year in the list.&#160 You’re not gonna be there again until the year after your squad wins at least four games.)

My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets are now in do-or-die mode.&#160 They play Western Hills tonight for the chance to go to the playoffs.&#160 (Way to go, Virginia!&#160 You’ve got a pedophilic pornographer for a senator!!!&#160 Happy now, douchebags?).&#160 Heights is 3-5; Hills is 5-4.&#160 Another one-and-done for Duke Christian’s boys (and hopefully, a reassignment next year).

Saturday, the Horned Frogs of TCU (I’d say “fuck you”, Nancy Pelosi…but who in their right mind would?) travel to New Mexico (home of that Clintoonite bastard governor, Slick Willie Richardson) to take on the Lobos.&#160 The line is TCU minus 6&#189, which is a pretty decent assessment, as the Froggies could just as easily lose this one.&#160 I’ll take TCU and you can have two.

Also Saturday, the 17th-ranked Oklahoma Sooners play host to Texas Tech at Memorial Stadium.&#160 Tech is not a good road team; yet, OU’s only favored by nine – and I think that’s a stretch.&#160 Take Tech and I’ll give you four.

Late Saturday afternoon, the Crimson Tide (Murthafucker, you’re a Grade-A chickenshit, assclown!) of Alabama travel to the Bayou City to serve as the whipping boy du jour&#160 for the 12th-ranked LSU Tigers.&#160 ‘Bama will prove tougher than, say, Fresno State – but the line’s LSU minus 18, and I pretty much expect it to not be all that close.

Every game now is pretty much make-or-break for the Dallas Cowboys.&#160 Win, and you have a chance going into next week.&#160 But lose another game, and the chances for a playoff run are like those of a Demoscum in a fistfight – not all that great.

This week, it’s Arizona out in the desert at their new stadium.&#160 The Cardinals are led by their first-round draft choice, quarterback Matt Leinart.&#160 And while they’ve played very well at home (despite having won one game the entire season) – if form holds, then the Cowboys should do to him what they did to Vince Young earlier this year. (Proving, maybe, that the Cowboys should have won the BCS championship, but…)

Interesting side note about this matchup:&#160 it’s the third of three sporting contests between teams from Dallas and Phoenix.&#160 Thursday night, the Dallas Stars beat the Phoenix Coyotes, 1-0, and the Dallas Mavericks got their first win of the new season by beating the Suns, 119-112.&#160 The Cowboys should make it a 3-0 sweep – but then, the Cowboys should&#160 have destroyed the Washington Foreskins last week (not to mention the Republicans should’ve destroyed the Demoscum on Tuesday, but for all the shitheads who think the Donktards know how to do anything&#160 better than the GOP…)

We’re back Monday or thereabouts for the recap (fuck the Demoscum).

(Hat time Misha via a link from LC kwongdzu.)

That didn’t take long, did it?

Now that Limpdickya doesn’t have to worry about conservatives in Congress any more, he can come out of the closet like he’s wanted to these last couple of years.

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Denizens, you can relax.&#160 I’ve not suicided over Black Tuesday&#153, nor am I going to.&#160 Just haven’t had much time to write over the last couple of days.

On yesterday’s travesty induced by the Moron-Americans&#153, I have a few ideas & opinions, and I’ll tell them to you in due course.

For now, however, Misha’s done a right nice job here and here.&#160 You’d do well to go read them.

On the eve of the most important election in our country’s history – and they all seem to be getting moreso as we go along, don’t they? – I’m going to delve deep into the Grab-Bag&#153 and remind you of what the Commander-in-Briefs did when it came to dealing with terrorism – and what the Left is likely to do if they’re put back into power.

The following is a NewsMax article from March 16, 2003.

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I have just one question:&#160 How much did Needledick Danny Snyder pay the fucking zebras for that&#160 piece of shit officiating job?

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Original Cast&#153 member and Denizen Alan K. Henderson pointed this Canadian article out to us during one of our semi-annual trips to Hooters.

Spew warnings in effect.

As we kick off another shot at a PFW this week, Denizens (and I promise I won’t fall asleep during the writing of this post (grin)), we find that my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets have jumped the gun on us, having defeated the hapless North Side Steers last night, 37-8.

Good on ya, Coach Duke Christian.&#160 You get to keep your job for another week.

Apparently, there will be a playoff next week to see who gets to be the third-place team going into the “hah skrewl” (a little Rush lingo, there) postseason.&#160 Heights is 3-5, but 2-2 in this four-game odyssey that the Fort Worth ISD athletic department decided to call a district schedule.&#160 It is, therefore, eminently possible that the Jackets will go into the playoffs with a losing record – and, as you may recall, I had something to say about such a concept.&#160 In other words…ew.

Saturday, the TCU Horned Frogs have what can be best described, given that they’re playing in Vegas, as a “sure thing”.&#160 The UNLV Rebels stomped Idaho State, 54-10, in Week 1 – then promptly went out and lost its next 7 games by a combined score of 253-99.

Vegas has the Froggies favored by 20&#189.&#160 For the sake of your program’s credibility, Gary Patterson, it’d better be 35.

Also Saturday, eighteenth-ranked Oklahoma travels to College Station for what we call a “double whammy” game – mainly because I don’t have anything better to call it.&#160 (Note to self:&#160 don’t let McCool name anything after he’s had five mugs of Romulan ale again.)&#160 We have a team that I follow against a team that I desperate hate – namely, 21st-ranked Texas A&M and head coach Dennis “The Mercenary” Franchione.&#160 The Ags are 8-1 – but they were calling for Fran’s head earlier after a near miss against Army, among other teams.

OU’s favored by 3, according to Vegas.&#160 Given the creampuff schedule A&M’s played, this scribe wonders why it’s not more.

Thirteenth-ranked LSU heads for Rocky Top Saturday to play the eighth-ranked Tennessee Volunteers.&#160 The Vols haven’t had the best of years, but they’re still expected to give the Tigers and Bo Pelini’s defense all they can handle (the line’s LSU minus 4).

UPDATE:&#160 Yes, even though they’re eighth-ranked, I’m not all that impressed with their play this year.&#160 Sue me.

Turner Gill’s UBuffalo Bulls will be at home Saturday against Kent.&#160 (They used to be Kent State – rumors that snipers took out the “State” part after it kept whining about the Iraq war were unsubstantiated at press time.)&#160 The line is Kent minus 16, so look for Buffalo to get its head handed to them again.

Sunday is Game Two of the Tony Romo era for the Cowboys, as they travel to Warshington Washington (sorry – little too much Texas accent there) to take on the dreaded Foreskins.&#160 This team handled the ‘Skins easily enough with Drew Bledsoe at quarterback, and Joe Gibbs’ charges have pretty much tanked since then.&#160 It’ll be interesting to see how LC John Wardle spins this&#160 beatdown.

We’re back Monday for the recap – Sunday evening if I don’t sleep through it…

Denizens, I’d happily offer something up on Botox Boy’s fuckheaded attempt at a death wish by questioning the intelligence of our troops over in Iraq.

Trouble is, Misha already beat me to it.

And then did it again.

And then, just for good measure, did it one more time.

Dangit.

I will say this:&#160 John-boy, you’re a fucking chickenshit who’d not dare&#160 say that to the face of a soldier.&#160 You’d sooner hide behind the triple-wide skirt of your rum-raisin queen, Tuh-RAAAAAYYY-zzzzzzuhhhhh, than dare to have your elitist snot-nosed ass handed to you.

FOAD, you pansy-assed pussy.