Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 18:02
[Scene: onboard Pegasus, in the Engineering section. Chief Engineer Ozymandias McCool is working on a computer console, inputting equations. Out of the corner of his eye, he catches a glimpse of Engineer Emeritus Merlin approaching.
MERLIN: On what dost thou workest, Ozy?
OZY MCCOOL: Hi, Merlin. I’m optimizing the computer core…that is, when it cooperates with me.
MERLIN: You’re supposed to take the core offline before you do that, else it’ll crash and the ship’ll…
OZY MCCOOL: Sssshhhh! I’m almost done perfecting this subroutine!
MERLIN: Ozy, I strongly recommend th—
[They are both interrupted by a loud BANG!!!!!!! and an explosion of sparks from the panel, which knocks Ozy back about 10 feet. The back of his noggin smacks the bulkhead and he falls face first to the deck.
Meanwhile, the ship has gone completely dark and dropped out of warp; the emergency lights come up a couple of seconds later.]
MERLIN: —that you find a place to hide before Korrioth gets down here.
LSIK&T (over speaker, sounding very pissed): Bridge to Engineering, report!!!
MERLIN: Admiral, we’ve had a computer crash…(looks at Ozy, still unconscious)…cause unknown. I’ve started a diagnostic, but we’re going to be here for a time.
LSIK&T (growling): Very well, Wizard. Keep me informed. Bridge out.
Denizens, it’s been eighteen months since I last reimaged the Big Box, so I’m taking part of the Presidents’ Day holiday to redo it. Assuming all goes well, posting shouldn’t suffer.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 13:17
To no one’s ghastly surprise, Republican moderate (emphasis intended) George H.W. Bush endorsed John-Boy McZhamnesty for president today.
But it was this paragraph that caught my eye:
Mr Bush dismissed criticism of Mr McCain’s conservative credentials by some high-profile commentators as “grossly unfair”.
He said Mr McCain had “a sound conservative record” and also praised his ability to reach across the aisle to the Democrats when needed.
Pardon me for saying so, George H. Shrubya Seen-your…but unless my memory’s playing tricks on me again, you yourself got your RINO ass soundly trounced from office after only one term FOR PRECISELY THAT REASON, DIDN’T YOU?!?!?!?!?1ONE!!
Or had you forgotten that you made a pledge to us at the 1988 Republican National Convention, then reached across the aisle and shattered that pledge three years later????
And now you have the unmitigated gall to be annoyed with us???
I got five words for you, Seen-your:
Eff. You. Gee. Haitch*. Dubya.
Yet another reason not to vote for McLameass…
*William Regal fans will understand the reference.