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I’ve been a conservative Southern Baptist most of my life.&#160 My earliest memory of Southern Baptist churches came almost to the day that my mother divorced my father.

Up until that point, and for a time right after “hah skrewl” (a little Rush lingo, there) when I was in a rebellious period of my life, I was a Presbyterian.&#160 But soon as mother divorced dad, she began to go to the church where her mother had been a longtime member.&#160 And dragged me and the Sibling Unit&#153 along with her.&#160 And thereafter, I’d always felt most comfortable…well, more comfortable than not…in the Southern Baptist Convention.&#160 Especially after the conservative takeover thereof in the 1980s.

That all ended Sunday night, when I read this RCOB-inducing bullshit.

In a major shift, a group of Southern Baptist leaders said their denomination has been “too timid” on environmental issues and has a biblical duty to stop global warming.

The declaration, signed by the president of the Southern Baptist Convention among others and released today, shows a growing urgency about climate change even within groups that once dismissed claims of an overheating planet as a liberal ruse.

We’ll forget for a minute that this country just went through one of the coldest, if not the&#160 coldest, winters in history.&#160 I mean, even though the frigid-as-a-witch’s-tit temps generally missed Dallas/Fort Worth, we still got our share of cold weather – it even snowed nine fucking inches&#160 in parts of the Metromess the other day.&#160 Putting that aside for just a minute, the very fact that it’s the liberal Donktards pushing this Glow-bullshit Wormening&#153 thing on us, not even wanting to invite debate on the matter, should&#160 have the heretofore-conservative Convention raising red flag after red flag after red flag – right?

Oh, but not only no, but HELL NO!&#160 (Pun only partially intended.)

“We believe our current denominational resolutions and engagement with these issues have often been too timid,” according to the statement.

I’d probably have to agree with that statement.&#160 Their reactions have been “too timid” in that they apparently have lacked sufficient spine to tell the Left Reverend Albert Arnold Algore, The Mostest Mostest Highest (on what exactly, who can say?) Glow-bull Wormening Goreacle&#153, exactly what he could go do with all of these so-called “issues” of his.

Not to mention trying to shove some of the aforementioned March D/FW snow up his fat ass.

“Our cautious response to these issues in the face of mounting evidence may be seen by the world as uncaring, reckless and ill-informed. We can do better.”

Oh fer Cthulu’s ever-more-blasphemous sake.

“Mounting evidence” like nine inches of snow in March in a place where it won’t even snow in December, January or February most winters?&#160 “Evidence” such as massive blasts of winter cold everywhere the Goreacle travels?&#160 The fact that the average&#160 temperature has risen one whole fuckin’ degree in the last century&#160 or so?

“We can do better” my ass.&#160 Quit trying to sound like John-boy F’n Qetchup-Ass and pandering to the environ-mental case asshats, huh?

But these paragraphs here, Denizens, are what have my blood boiling:

No one speaks on behalf of all Southern Baptists, who leave decision-making to local churches. Yet, the signatories of today’s resolution represent some of the top figures in the convention.

Among them are the denomination’s president, the Rev. Frank Page of South Carolina; two former presidents, the Rev. James Merritt of Georgia and the Rev. Jack Graham of Texas; and the Rev. Ronnie Floyd of Arkansas, who helped conservatives solidify control of the denomination in the 1970s and 1980s.

Didja see that name?&#160 Jack Graham of Texas?

Up until this past Sunday night, that was&#160 my pastor.&#160 Yes, sportz fanz – I was a member (whether in good standing is anyone’s guess) at Prestonwood Baptist, where Graham rides herd.&#160 And when I read that my pastor had signed this piece of abject bullshit, I promptly emailed him and told him – nicely, of course; he is&#160 a pastor – what he and the Southern Baptist Convention could go do with themselves.

Memo to the SBC:&#160 If I wanted to be a member of a liberal, touchy-feely, Gaia-worshipping cult, I’d go with the Pepsi-cola church.&#160 Or the Unitarians.&#160 Or the Catholics – hell, none of them worship Creator God anymore; what difference would it make?

But hey, SBC – enjoy pleasing mammon rather than the God who created you.&#160 And do go get your Bibles and read Revelation 3:14-17.&#160 Before you suffer the same fate that&#160 church did.