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Three years & counting, Denizens.

Three years ago, Widdle Mikey “Mykki Chickenshit” Cortese, the Leftard Colostomy Bag Reverend of the Church of the SubTarded&#153 was invited to come down here to Texas to see if he had the same cojones&#160 face-to-face that he does spewing his methane whilst hiding behind his keyboard.&#160 Or his skank, whichever smells least like tuna this evening.

Best he could do is have his sock puppet, “Von Vockerman”, offer a meager pittance of $66 to go up to Tennessee, ostensibly for a “showdown” (what, Socko, did you think I was gonna hitchhike?). Neither the plays-with-inflatable-dolls pussy nor the $66 has ever darkened my doorstep.&#160 (Neither have any of his needle-dick-slurping sycophants – not even the ones who live in the next county, eh, “Firefox”? – but that’s another post for another time.)

I’m still waiting, nancy-boy.&#160 But if that’s your picture on your “new” blog, I think I understand why you’ve never shown your ugly ass here.&#160 Hell, I think Michael Crook could probably beat the shit out of you.

Incidentally, did you ever figure out whether you lived in Alexandria or Arlington?&#160 Inquiring minds, y’know.

Of course, you could&#160 always go take that M-1 pop-gun of yours and help out the Al-Qaida insurgency in Iraq that you love so.&#160 Their ranks are getting kinda thin, so I imagine they could use a hand.&#160

But then, maybe not.&#160 Even the insurgents have more balls than a weak-assed little pussy like you.&#160 Hell, I understand that one of the inflatable dollies beat your ass into the ground the other day.&#160 Wonder if YouTube has that vid?&#160

Fucking asswipe.

Denizens, those of you remaining from The Six Or Seven Who Used To Regularly Read Me&#153, if you’ve paid attention to me for any length of time at all, know me for having said this:&#160 With the heterophobic community, despite all their lispy-assed, manaical bleatings to the contrary over the years, it’s never been the slightest bit about “tolerance” with them.&#160 It has always been, and always will be, about acceptance.&#160 What they want, more than anything else – save, perhaps, for their next in-through-the-out-door tryst – is for us to say that what they do is perfectly okay.&#160 An eminently acceptable “alternative lifestyle”.&#160 Just another “choice” for said lifestyle.

Which, as you have always heard me tell you, is the one thing I will never&#160 say.&#160 There is NoWayInHell&#153 that His Rudeness&#153 will ever&#160 give the sodomite community the green light to have their little swishyfests.&#160 The practice of homosexuality was perversion in the ancient times; it is perversion today; it will be perversion tomorrow; it will always be&#160 perversion.&#160 Period, end, stop.

Thus, it should come as no surprise how pissed-off I am about the Pathetic Pussified Pinktards&#153 trying to shove both their “lifestyle” and their agenda down the throats of those of us in Flyover Country&#153.&#160 It’s already happening in Canada, where Focus on the Family’s&#160 James Dobson has been forced to edit his message, lest the Canorkian half-assed excuse-for-a-government do it for them at the point of a gun (they had already forced another Christian ministry out of their pathetic country previously).

Within the last few months, the Demoscum chief needle-dick executive of Colorado, Widdle Willie Witter, signed into law a blatantly un-Constitutional piece of shit that can theoretically outlaw certain portions of the Bible – a move that Focus&#160 calls a payback to the Butt-Buddy Brigade&#153 for helping to put his sorry little ass in office.

But now we have something that just might take the cake.&#160 A smarmy little pissant limp-wrist has filed two lawsuits totalling $70 million&#160 against two of the largest Bible publishers in the world.

A homosexual man who has a blog on Sen. Barack Obama’s campaign website

Pray tell, why are we not surprised that Swishy Boy here is involved with B. HUSSEIN!!!!!1!ONE!&#160 Obambi?

Jackass-i-miah Wrong, the Left Pfoul-mouth Pfelching Pfather Pfuckhead Pfleger, and now this&#160 guy?&#160 Day-um, Flopears the Manchurian Muslim sure knows how to pick his associates, doesn’t he?

is suing two major Christian publishers for violating his constitutional rights and causing emotional pain, because the Bible versions they publish refer to homosexuality as a sin.

That’s nothing compared to the pain the little pussy is in for when he shuffles off our little mortal coil here, I’d be willing to wager.

Bradley LaShawn Fowler Bwadwee LaThhawwwwn Fowwer [Fixed it for ya.&#160 -Ed.], 39, of Canton, Mich., is seeking $60 million from Zondervan and another $10 million from Thomas Nelson Publishing in lawsuits filed in U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of Michigan, the Grand Rapids Press reported.

Wow.&#160 Suing to make the First Amendment un-Constitutional.&#160 What a novel concept.&#160 What’ll they think of next?

Fowler filed his claim against Grand Rapids-based Zondervan Monday, alleging its Bibles’ references to homosexuality as a sin have made him an outcast from his family and contributed to physical discomfort

Translation:&#160 Mom, Dad and whatever brothers he has knocked the shit out of him and threw his swishy, skanky ass out of the house.

and periods of “demoralization, chaos

There’s confirmation on getting his ass thrown out of the house.

and bewilderment,” the paper said.

Bewilderment, most likely, about why his rapidly-dwindling list of normal male friends weren’t terribly interested in a friendly&#160 (*cough*) little game of hide-the-salami.

U.S. District Judge Julian Abele Cook Jr. refused Monday to appoint an attorney to represent Fowler in the Thomas Nelson case, saying the court “has some very genuine concerns about the nature and efficacy of these claims.”

Now this guy Cook may be the only sensible party (other than Zondervan and Nelson) in this whole affair.&#160 No, absolutely don’t&#160 let this total waste of oxygen have his own counsel.&#160 He’s written a book under the moniker “Bradley Almighty” – let the dumb little syphilitic sow save himself with his own counsel.

Fowler alleges both Zondervan and Thomas Nelson, with its King James Bible, manipulated Scripture without informing the public by using the term “homosexuals” in a New Testament passage, 1 Corinthians 6:9.

Perhaps this legal Einstein here can, in his infinite wisdom&#160 (*coughbullshitcoughbullshitcough*), tell us Great Unwashed Masses&#153 just&#160 what Constitutional article, Constitutional amendment, U.S. law, state law or city ordinance requires that a Bible publisher give any sort of notice whatsoever just what&#160 it puts in its publications in the first place?!

(*massive amounts of crickets*)

Yeah, uh-huh.&#160 Thought&#160 so…

He told the Grand Rapids TV station in an interview he wants to “compensate for the past 20 years of emotional duress and mental instability.”

Yeah, I’m totally on board with the “mental instability” bit.&#160 Five’ll get you ten it extends to “emotional” and “psychological”, as well.

On his personal blog’s “About Me” page, Fowler says that while serving a sentence in the Michigan Department of Corrections

Ah, now&#160 the truth comes out.&#160 Quite easy to see the cause of all the “instability”.&#160 Serving a stint as Bubba’s bitchipoo will do that to a guy.&#160 Whaddya wanna bet that’s where he learned to better appreciate how to give receive and receive?

he “gained a sincere interest” in the Bible’s teachings and, over a 10 year period, “became so engrossed within” the Scriptures, he couldn’t do much more than eat and sleep

That, and take it up the ass every night from whichever prison gang won the nightly craps shoot.

Bwadwee, you’re nothing but a failed widdle jailhouse lawyer.&#160 You’re in way over your head on this one, and it’s all because you can’t handle the truth that you’re a freakish, effeminate little faggot puke with delusions of adequacy.

Yeah – I just called you a faggot, Bwadwee.&#160 Whyn’t you come sue me like you’re doing with Zondervan & Nelson?&#160 C’mon, needle-dicked little assclown – I dare you.

In fact, come serve the papers yourself, dipshit.&#160 You can get an instant response from me – 38/100 of a rejoinder at a time.

Stupid little pansy-assed fuckhead.

Denizens, the Red Curtain O’ Blood&#153 has once again made its way over my eyes tonight, but I’m posting this with basically only one eye-half open.&#160 Ergo, watch for the rant tomorrow night.

In the meantime, I have some damned good news worth a &#160 &#160 &#160 or three.

According to Mexican consulate officials in Dallas, some 400 immigrant families have told them so far this year that they’re going back to Mexico and asked for transfer documents to enroll their children in Mexican schools.

Enrique Hubbard Urrea, Mexican consul general in Dallas, said it is impossible to track every Mexican who leaves the area. But he said the number asking for transfer documents at the consulate is on the rise.

At a rate of eight per family average – yes, I’m being conservative on that estimate; why do you ask? – that’s 3200 down, 19,996,800 left to go.

According to informal surveys by the Mexican consulate in Dallas, most of those wanting to return to Mexico cite the sudden scarcity of jobs, fear of deportation and uncertainty about obtaining legal resident status any time soon.

In the last few years, and particularly the last few months, Mr. Sánchez struggled to find work. His earnings dwindled as his children grew up and their needs multiplied.

“People like me, if you don’t work one day, you worry about how to feed your family the next day,” he said. “We as immigrant workers never have stability, even if the economy is doing well. Imagine how things are now.”

“Can’t deport ’em all”, eh, Linguinispineya???

Hell, it’s like we’ve been trying to tell you – you, and anyone else who’d listen:&#160 Take away their reason for being here, and the little pendejo&#160 fuckers will deport themselves.

And this doesn’t hurt things, either:

Also, he said, there is growing anti-immigrant sentiment that he would rather not experience anymore.

“Those of us who live here live depressed all the time, in hiding,” he said. “They don’t like us here, and those who love us and whom we love are far away. I prefer to go back, even if it means living in poorer conditions.”

Mr. Hubbard said tougher enforcement of immigration laws in the last few years hasn’t gone unnoticed.

“Some say companies fear hiring people without proper documents,” he said.

He said others are seeing authorities detain more people in Irving, Farmers Branch and, to a lesser degree, Carrollton.

Damned effin’ straight.&#160 See, guys, they can&#160 be, uh, “persuaded” that they’ve maybe overstayed their welcome a little bit.&#160

Don’t let the door hit you en los pompis&#160 on the way out, ilegales.

We paid a lot for that door.

They buried one hell of a conservative voice today.&#160 Jesse Helms, a hero of the conservative movement and a man who almost never caved in to leftard political pressure, died of natural causes on the Fourth of July.&#160 Most appropriate, since Thomas Jefferson and John Adams also shuffled off this mortal coil on that date.

Misha, as usual has waxed most eloquently on Helms’ passing, and there’s NoWayInHell&#153 I could possibly improve on it.&#160 Denizen & fellow blogger Alan K. Henderson has some of Jesse’s greatest hits (incidenatlly, AKH, it’s not spelled with an “i”, just fyi).

They tried to derisively label him “Senator No”.&#160 He wore it like a badge of honor.&#160 He was genteel & cordial to even his fiercest political opponents, but he never gave a fat rat’s ass what the leftards thought of him, either.

I wish there were more in the Imperial Socialist Congress like Jesse Helms.&#160 (Perhaps if there were, we wouldn’t be calling them the Imperial Socialist Congress.)&#160 We need more like him.

UPDATE:&#160 Slightly red-faced thanks to Denizen & fellow blogger David Hartung for pointing out to me that I’d screwed up yet another link.

That’s what I get for blogging with only one eye open.&#160

All I have to say is that for what this is gonna cost you, I hope that Louise at least put out for you a little bit.

As some of you probably know, the Sibling Unit&#153 put on the Dreaded & Feared Ball & Chain&#153 today, which is where I’ve been all day instead of gracing you guys with My Eternal Wisdom&#153.

But I did, some time back, promise you Gratuitous Gun Pr0n!!!!!!!!1!!ONE~1&#153 – and I like to keep my promises.

So, without further adieu…

This is a Bersa Thunder 380cc – a .380 semi-auto handgun (duh!) that produced very&#160 nice groupings on the first time out.&#160 It is now the carry piece of choice – which was the intent all along (in fact, it hid very nicely in an internal holster during the Sibling Unit&#153’s Last Meal&#153 as a single guy last evening).&#160 It handles well, fits superbly in the hand – and, as mentioned earlier, has superior groupings.&#160 (The “cc” stands, obviously, for “concealed carry” – but I figure you guys already knew that.&#160 )

This would be a fine piece with which to qualify for a CHL – and, when mine’s up for renewal in a couple years, that’s just what I’m gonna do.&#160

“When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. –That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. —Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain [George III] is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

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Oh, dammit.

We lost an icon today, Denizens.&#160 Larry Harmon, whom I know for a fact you all know better as Bozo the Clown, has passed away of congestive heart failure.&#160 He was 83.

He wasn’t the original Bozo, and certainly there have been others who donned the orange-frizzed wig, huge cherry-red nose, the red, white and powder-blue outfit and the size 83AAA (his words) – but no one played the character better.

“I felt if I could plant my size 83AAA shoes on this planet, (people) would never be able to forget those footprints,” he said.

The Realm’s prayers are with the Harmon family tonight.&#160 We loved Larry, and he will be sorely missed.

Item:&#160 Jessica Simpson was spotted wearing a t-shirt that said, and I quote, “Real Girls Eat Meat”.

Item:&#160 It pissed PETA off.&#160 Good.&#160

Item:&#160 Pamela Anderson Lee-Rock-Lee-whomever she humps next tries a rip job on Jessica.&#160 Rumor has it that the “choice” name she called Jessica was “whore”.

Yeah.&#160 You read right.&#160 Jessica Simpson got called a “whore” by Pamela Anderson Lee-Rock-Lee-whomever’s-next.

Must…fight…urge…to…aw, hell with it.

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