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Since all of us are aware of whom Spats favors when it comes to the NFL Texas Fooo-ball teams, and that by now hopefully ya’ll have been able to surmise that I and the rest of the folks in these here neck of the woods around the Southern Command HQ would probably be ones to prefer the other Texas team, I would request that you wander over here for a quick laugh at the expense of Spat’s Cowgurls.

NOW, I do have to admit that growing up (even when I was a “displaced Texan” living in Illinois) the Cowboys were always my team. But back then, the men that compromised “America’s team” certainly made us proud to be their fans. (Spats, I KNOW you’ll agree with me on that observation)

Not like the more recent years where the team made more news OFF the field than on. In the years since the departure of Landry, Aikman, Johnson, and Smith…it seems that the team has a better arrest record than season record. Yes, Wade Phillips and Jason Garrett have gotten things turned around and some of the old “good” habits are starting to make an appearance again.

But I also happen to have gained an appreciation over the years for the underdog. Ever since Houston got a football team back (and even more so since moving to the local vicinity) and primarily since Gary Kubiak took over the head coaching job, I’ve seen the sort of dedication and desire that was inherent in the teams that Tom Landry coached.

So here’s to the in-state rivalry called the “Governor’s Cup”. Bring it on!

Given that the Demoscum, for all their supposed UNITY!!!!!1!!ONE!!!1, seem to be imploding like a black star, you’d think that all McZhamnesty need do now is run a strong-yet-typical GOP campaign, and the White House would be his, right?

Guess again.

According to reports, McRINO has selected his running mate.

And of the three presumed finalists, none are promising.

If he picks Pawlenty, he receives virtually nothing in the way of bounce – and if you think Pawlenty’s gonna deliver Minnehaha for Old John&#153, you got another think coming.

If he picks Lieberman, he loses his conservative base.&#160 And no less a person than Lieberman himself has told McCain this.

And if he picks Romney – sorry to tell you this, conservatives, but McDoofus loses the election, guaranteed.

“But why, Spats?”, I hear you ask.

Simple.&#160 And I’ll say it, even if no one else will:&#160 Romney’s a Mormon.

We evangelicals take our faith seriously.&#160 And Scripture advises us that Mormonism, while noble & honorable in its regard for the family, is still – by definition – a cult.

The evangelical wing of the party will not support a Mormon in such a high position of power.&#160 And mark my words – without us, the GOP will not win.&#160 On that, you can safely bank.

And you can take the accusations of religious bigotry and narrow-mindedness and shove ’em back up your piehole.&#160 We’re adamant about this, and name-calling will make us even more stubborn.&#160 We’re funny that way.

McCain’s best bet, if you ask us (or even if you didn’t) is someone like Fred Thompson or even Rob Portman of Ohio, or perhaps Newt Gingrich (although I have to wonder just how willing he’d be to cave in to Demoscum at the drop of a hat).

But if he picks Romney, he’s done.&#160 Trust me on this.

UPDATE:&#160 And not necessarily hedging my bet here, but all of the above about Romney is predicated on the evangelical wing of which I spoke actually doing what I expect them to do.&#160 I could be wrong, and they could support McCain even if he does pick Mitt.

If that happens, I’ll be sorely disappointed in the evangelicals.&#160 (Then again, the SBC hopped in bed with the environmentals this year, so maybe I shouldn’t be too terribly surprised if it happens.)

Shitcago-style socialist politics have sunk their poisounous talons deep inside the Demoscummic party, as the presidential nomination is handed to the Manchurian Muslim&#153, completing the disenfranchisement of millions of voters:

Barack Obama, claiming a prize never held by a black American,

Uh, “half-black”, if you really wanna get technical about it.

And thank you, but we already knew what color he was, not that it mattered.&#160 But you’re going to drive it into our heads just like you did that John-boy F’n Qetchup-ass spent a cup of coffee in Vietnam, aren’t you?&#160

swept to the Democratic presidential nomination on Wednesday as thousands of national convention delegates stood and cheered his improbable triumph.

Former rival Hillary Rodham Clinton asked the convention delegates to make it unanimous “in the spirit of unity, with the goal of victory.” And they did, with a roar.

IOW, Denizens, when push really&#160 came to shove, the Duchess Hilarious folded like the cheap-assed pantsuit she wore to bleat out her speech Tuesday night.

And lookie here, Asphyxiated Piss – you can dispense with the fucking BS about “improbable triumph”.&#160 Ever since the Demoscum decided it’d rather piss off the women than the blacks, we’ve known this was gonna happen.&#160 Ever since you bastard lapdogs glossed over the Rev’r’nnnnnnd Jackass-i-miah, the Pfelching Pfuckhead Pfather Pfleger, the why-isn’t-he-in-prison terrorist Billy-Bob Ayers, et. al, we’ve known this was a fait accompli.

And in choosing to make a candidate’s color&#160 your primary criterion for the post, you’ve once again nominated an embarrassingly empty suit – one, I might hasten to add, who has spent less than 200 total days doing the job he was sent to Washington to effin’ do!!!

And when the country wakes up and hands him his electoral ass in November, you won’t have to look very far as to why.&#160 Which is fortunate for you Donktards, because your political vision can only be described as acute myopia, at best.

Clinton’s call for Obama to be approved by acclamation – midway through the traditional roll call of the states – was the culmination of a painstaking agreement worked out between the two camps to present a unified front.

And Duchess, I’m not sure whether to laugh at you, feel sorry for you or majorly disappointed.&#160 Given that you had most Demoscum’s (and a few spineless Republicans’) balls in a testicle lockbox during the eight years of Das Klintonreich&#153, I expected you to put up a helluva lot more of a fight than to just let him slap you down like a pimp does his ho’.&#160 Definitely not your best performance.

Obama’s nomination sealed a political ascent as astonishing as any other in recent memory – made all the more so by his race, in a nation founded by slave owners.

And continuing to be populated by slave owners, if one is to buy the Asphyxiated Piss’ exceedingly-thinly-veiled insinuation.

In the first place, Piss-heads, while many of the Founding Fathers did own slaves, you’ll be heartbroken to know that many did not.

And not to belabor the point, but no one with so much as an ounce of intellectual integrity ever credits the leftards with ending slavery, mkay?&#160 (We will, for the time being, forget that Lincoln did by employing a time-honored Demoscum tactic – denying the individual states their sovereignty.)

And not to put too&#160 fine a point on it, it wasn’t the Republicans who tried to stop the Civil Rights Bill of 1964, either:

The bill came before the full Senate for debate on March 30, 1964 and the “Southern Bloc” of southern Senators led by Richard Russell (D-GA) launched a filibuster to prevent its passage. Said Russell “We will resist to the bitter end any measure or any movement which would have a tendency to bring about social equality and intermingling and amalgamation of the races in our (Southern) states.” (emphasis mine)

So spare us this “America is a mean, nasty, racist country” bullshit, mkay?

Now.&#160 If you Jackasses really&#160 want B. HUSSEIN!!!&#160 Obambi as your candidate, so be it.&#160 Just keep in mind that, as more and more people have started paying attention, your candidate’s poll numbers have been steadily declining.&#160 There hasn’t been a convention bounce so far – in fact, just as Kerry’s did in ’04, Obumbler’s numbers have also gone down.&#160 And this Greek-style, Caesar-like coronation theme for his acceptance speech tomorrow night isn’t going to help perceptions any.

I predict history will show that you leftist dipshits should’ve listened to me Sunday night when I suggested that you ignore the Obamessiah Express&#153 and nominate Hillary.&#160 But that would have taken, you know, brains&#160 – and we all know how short your supply is of those.&#160

So when you get your asses handed you in November…don’t say you weren’t warned.

I’ll be saying it for you.&#160

Showing the world her ugly ass how The Most Ethical Congress EVAH&#153 is a bastion of servitude to the American electorate, San Fran Nan Piglousy, the Shrieker of the House&#153, demonstrated her contempt for We The People&#153:

House Democratic leaders and protesters waving McCain signs had a war of words Tuesday at a press event outside an old train station. The demonstrators interrupted House Speaker Nancy Pelosi with chants of “Drill here! Drill now!”

Pelosi paused and asked the group, “Right here?”

Seeming to enjoy the back and forth, she followed with another question: “Can we drill your brains?”

You probably should, Madame Shrieker.&#160 It’s fairly obvious to all that you’re clearly lacking in that regard.

She went on to refer to the protesters, who continued to chant sporadically, as “handmaidens of Big Oil.”

And what if we are, bitch?&#160 Unlike you, skank, we&#160 see the reality that the world’s economy is fueled by oil.&#160 Then again, right-thinkers such as us aren’t fucking tree-hugging Gaia&#153-worshippers like you and the rest of the environ-mental cases.

Arguing that increased offshore drilling would reduce gas prices by only a couple of pennies a decade from now, she referred to the demonstrators as the “2-cents-in-10-years-crowd.”

So lemme get this straight, you Cupid Stunt&#153:&#160 Simply talking about drilling drops the price of a barrel of oil $30 (with a resulting forty-to-fifty-cent drop in the price of gas), but actually drilling&#160 for our own oil…

…you know, such as countries like Venezuela do – countries, I might add that pay, what, 12 cents for a gallon of gasoline?

…is only gonna drop the price two&#160 cents?

And you’re the best&#160 San Transexual could send to Washington, you fucking retard-ette?

Majority Leader Steny H. Hoyer swiped at the demonstrators, too, saying that “sophomoric chanting” won’t solve the energy crisis and that “all thinking Americans know” — stressing the word “thinking” and looking at the crowd — that America doesn’t have a quarter of the word’s fossil fuels yet uses a quarter of the world’s energy.

Would that be “sophomoric chanting” like YES WE CAN, YES WE CAN!!!!!!1!!ONE!!???

And then you assclowns wonder why Congress has an approval rating in the single digits?

Fuckheads.&#160