Local time where you're at. ("Where you're at"?)

Your General was casually reading the news on my computer when something came scrolling across that made me RCOB and then nearly call for a tactical strike team to deploy. As most of you know, both Darth and myself are rather “outspoken” when it comes to issues involving the “ed-u-ka-shun” of the young skulls full of mush (for you folks in Rio Linda that’s children). This has become even more relevant for your General since the new Generalette is herself an elementary school educator. And one who is very good at her job (no, there was not any bribing involved to get me to say that).

So, back to on topic….when I came across this article I was ready to…..well, see above.

Holy WTF are they thinking? Wait, obviously these twits over at the (U)seless (N)itwits Education, Social, and Cultural Organization (is it just me or does that name just reek of a “community organization”) do not KNOW how to think clearly. It’s blatantly ignorant beauracrappers like this that are trying to push social engineering agendas down on our childrens that created a generation of hippies and numbskulls that unfortunately have found their way into authority and insist on propagating their so-called social justice.

Folks, I know I don’t need to ask you to do this….but let others know about this. It’s bad enough when Al-Obambi and the Brown Shirt brigade try to spawn this on us, it’s worse when the Useless Nitwits want to spread it all across the globe. This needs to end a merciless death, quickly.

[SCENE:&#160 The bridge of the new Realm&#153 dreadnaught, Titanic.&#160 After a quite inglorious launch (the engines having catastrophically failed two days out from spacedock), the great behemoth finds itself back home, having been towed by a Federation tug.

His Rudeness&#153, Lord Darth Venomous, sits & broods in his command chair, eyes welded shut.&#160 One could easily mistake him for dozing, except his brow is deeply furrowed and his jaw perpetually in motion from what appears to be a grinding of his teeth.]

VENOMOUS:&#160 That’s right, Allan.&#160 And they’re gonna continue to gnash until I have something other than a fucking incompetent for a chief engineer.

[I’m deeply sorry, m’lord.&#160 Can I be of service in any regard?]

VENOMOUS:&#160 Know anything about starboard power couplings?

[Only that Cmdr. K’tinghe entered into a deal with the Federation to supply the ones for this ship.]

VENOMOUS:&#160 McManx, send a dispatch to Fleet command.&#160 K’tinghe is to be demoted to Lieutenant and thrown in the brig until further notice.

T-BONE MCMANX:&#160 Aye, sir.&#160 [Something at his console catches his eye.]&#160 Admiral, incoming message from Realm&#153 Intelligence.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Put it through to my ready room, Lieutenant.

T-BONE MCMANX:&#160 Aye, sir.

[Cut to the Admiral’s ready room.&#160 The doors part and in walks Venomous, who sits at his deak and punches up the incoming dispatch from Realm&#153 Intelligence.]

TO:&#160 Adm. Darth Venomous, Realm&#153 Fleet Operations

FROM:&#160 Realm&#153 Intelligence

SUBM:&#160 PFW&#153

Admiral:

It’s Zero Week in Texas.

—Intelligence

[The Admiral grins wolfishly.&#160 Finally, he has a reason to be happy.]

—

Okay, guys, they start counting for real now.&#160 Everybody ready?

CREW:&#160 (nods anxiously)

Then let’s get to it.

The first regular-season edition of the Perfect Football Weekend&#153…(deep breath, exhale)…kicks off…

CREW:&#160 COORRRRRNNNNNN-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!1!!ONE!!1!!!!ELEVENTY!!!1~

Awright, now that we got that&#160 outta the way for the year…

…kicks off with my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets engaging – along with all other “hah skrewls” (a little Rush lingo, there) in the state of Texas – in a tradition known as “Zero Week” in the football season.

For Coach Steve Hale and the Jackets, that means a return trip to Haltom City to play the second half of a home-and-home with the Birdville Buffaloes, of the ISD with the same name.

Heights pulled the upset last year in Fort Worth, so don’t for one minute think that the Beefaloes have forgotten that.&#160 Though it pains me to do so, I’m gonna call the squash here against my boys.

Saturday night, the preseason continues for the Dallas C’boys, as the San Transexual Francisco Fairy-Whiners Forty-Niners come to JerryWorld for a Week Three matchup

MERLIN:&#160 You’re not calling them the Fairy Whiners anymore?

KORRIOTH:&#160 You’re not calling them “San Transexual” anymore?

KORRIOTH & MERLIN (together):&#160 Who are you and what have you done with Lord Venomous?

VENOMOUS:&#160 Relax, guys.&#160 As long as Mike Singletary’s in charge, they’re not the despicable, despiseable enemy they once were.

Still, they’re a rival and these are&#160 the C’boys, so I’ll probably be screaming as always.&#160 Even if it is&#160 preseason.

We’re back Sunday or Monday with the recap.&#160 In the meantime, we’re wondering if the Patriots will now change their logo to look like Teddy the Red-Nosed Senator…