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Denizens, this week’s edition of the Perfect Football Weekend…

VENOMOUS:&#160 Gentlemen, I’m in a bit of pain today, and I do not&#160 feel like it, mkay?

MERLIN:&#160 Uh, it’s nothing we did, is it?

VENOMOUS:&#160 No, Wizard, you guys are cool…

MERLIN, KORRIOTH, K’HADIBAK’H, OZY, T-BONE, K’TINGHE:&#160 (collective sigh of relief)

VENOMOUS:&#160 …it’s something I did to myself last night.

KORRIOTH:&#160 So that’s&#160 where my painstick went.

MERLIN, KORRIOTH, K’HADIBAK’H, OZY, T-BONE, K’TINGHE:&#160

VENOMOUS:&#160 Quite.&#160 I needed something that tickled by comparison.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Eep.

…anyway, it kicks off with this blurb concerning Widdle Terri Owens’ seeming obsession with Roy Williams.

Owens said, per Pro Football Talk yesterday, “I’ve been looking at my stats compared to Roy E. Williams’ stats over there in Dallas, and my goal is to have better stats then him at the end of the season.”

Which just goes to show, Terri, that you completely missed the point of the trade which brought Williams to Dallas in the first place.

Roy was brought in, not to compete with you, but to take some of the double team pressure off&#160 you, so that you could be more productive.&#160 (That the plan failed to work is beside the point.)&#160 On the other hand, had you bothered to…oh, I dunno…CATCH THE CRITICAL PASSES THAT WERE THROWN BETWEEN THE FUCKIN’ EIGHT AND ONE ON YOUR CHEST, DUMBASS!!!…mayhap the plan would have worked a little better, no?

Anyway, we here in the Realm&#153 aren’t all that sure that it’s Williams on whom you should be focusing.

As one could probably guess, this isn’t exactly a lofty goal at this point. Playing in five games this year, Williams has 12 catches for 230 yards and a touchdown; Owens, in seven games, has 18 catches for 242 yards and one touchdown. Perhaps Owens, in his advanced age, is bowing to the inevitable erosion of skills–basically, being realistic. He’s certainly not throwing down any sort of noticeable gauntlet.

If he wanted to do that, he’d set his goals with a bit more bravado, go after the numbers of, say, Miles Austin.

And that would just be crazy.

To be sure.&#160 Austin’s played four fewer games than Widdle Terri…and outgained him by 260 yards with three more balls caught.&#160 And&#160 the C’boys are 4-2, whilst the Bills are…3-4.

Uh…Terrell who?&#160

On to the PFW.&#160 My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets will go up tonight against the Eastern Hills Highlanders in the last district game of the year prior to the annual playoff one-and-done.&#160 Eastern Hills will put up token resistance, but as long as the Jackets don’t look too&#160 much at the Highlander cheerleaders (grin), they should make fairly easy work of the football team.

Bob Stoopes’ 21st-ranked Oklahoma Sooners go for the mythical Kansas championship this weekend as the K-State Wildcats come to Memorial Stadium for their annual grilling at OU’s hands.&#160 The Sooners are a 28-point favorite, and I expect they’ll cover.

Nebraska, OTOH, is a different story.&#160 The Cornhuskers are a 13&#189-point favorite at Baylor tomorrow.&#160 Then again…they were favored at home against Iowa State, weren’t they?&#160 Keep your eyes peeled on this one; I can’t guarantee you Baylor doesn’t outright win this game.

The marquee college game this week…seeing as UBuffalo’s off (cough), is the UNLV Runnin’ Rebels against the sixth-ranked Texas Christian Horned Frogs.

Remember the concept of “attaboy/awshit”?&#160 You can accumulate ten thousand “attaboys” – such as TCU’s monumental victory last week against BYU – but it only takes one “aw, shit”…such as potentially losing to the Rebs this week at home…whereupon you lose all your attaboys, and you have to start ALL…OVER…AGAIN&#153.

Therefore, memo to Gary Patterson:&#160 Coach, put these guys away, and do it quick.&#160 Let them hang around, and it’s potential disaster.&#160 We need a squash this week, the quicker the better.

Go get’m.

Sunday, the Dallas C’boys are at home for what should&#160 be a win against a banged-up Seattle Seahawk team.&#160 Seattle’s O-line is in patchwork array, and they just put All-World left tackle Walter Jones on IR, ending his season (and, as speculation goes, his career as well).&#160 Jones was one of the few tackles whom you could trust to at least hold his own one-on-one against Demarcus Ware.&#160 Look for the Dallas pass rush to have a field day Sunday – I wouldn’t wanna be Matt Hasselbeck RightAboutNow&#153.

We’re back Monday for the recap.&#160 In the meantime Purdue’s only a 6&#189-point road dog against Bucky, and my question for HDD is:&#160 Shouldn’t this be more?&#160 They’re not that&#160 evenly matched, are they?

I will leave it to others to discuss more fully, but yesterday was the 40th anniversary of the first internet connection. Read about it here.

Looking at what has happened in the past 40 years makes me wonder what will happen in the next 40.