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…there must be an equal moment of pain.

#3 Texas Christian 10, Smurf Turd Fuckhead State 17

I don’t know who to be more pissed-off at here – a Blue Shit excuse-for-a-team that proved again&#160 that it couldn’t win playing straight-up football, a fuckheaded coach who either (depending on who you talk to) worked his kids too hard or not hard enough, a 3rd-year quarterback who played like a high-school senior in giving away the game, or the shitty officiating (and yes, sportz fanz – it was extremely&#160 shitty).

So let’s take them in order:

1) A half-assed team of Smurfettes that thinks it’s a lot better than it is.

Let’s get one thing straight right off the bat before I say anything else:&#160 Boise Fucking State is not capable of winning a major bowl game, or a game against any superior opponent, without resorting to trick plays.&#160 The Broncettes are simply not.&#160 Talented.&#160 Enough.

They proved this two years ago in the Fiesta Bowl against Oklahoma.&#160 They needed a hook-and-ladder trick play just to get the damned thing tied, then they needed the “Statue-of-Liberty” trick play for the winning points.

Then you blue-orange pussies needed a fake punt on fourth-and-nine to keep that next-to-last drive going against TCU.&#160 By then, the Frogs had figured out what the Mares were doing and had stuffed it back up their asses.&#160 Punt the ball there, and we come down, shove it down their throats and either kick the winning field goal or score the clinching touchdown.

So I don’t wanna hear about Smurfdick State being “better” than TCU, or any other college football team for that matter.&#160 You play chickenshit football, you can’t win fuck-all without either trickery or officiating help, and you’re not deserving of a ranking anytime, anywhere, much less one above TCU.

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2) Pull your head out, Patterson.

The stakes are higher now, Gary.&#160 You’ve proven you can torch the Wyomings, San Diego States and BYUs of the world.&#160 If you want the program to be taken seriously – if you want to not “break the city’s heart” like you kept harping about all during December – now it’s time to win the big games.

And I don’t mean the Poinsettia Bowls, either.

No, it wasn’t the BCS Championship – but it was&#160 a BCS bowl.&#160 There are only four of them besides the championship game, so only eight teams are so honored every year.&#160 Ergo, this honor that was bestowed on you might not be so again for quite a long time – so it’s incumbent upon you to seize the opportunity when it’s there.

And that means that you don’t get “outcoached” on a fake punt that you should have been looking for in the first place.

Seriously.&#160 Up until then, they hadn’t run a trick play all night, and just based on the year before, you knew that that’s their bread-and-butter – and you let them catch you asleep at the wheel on one.

Nice, Gary.&#160 Very nice.&#160 And here I’d gone and retracted my position on you being in over your head.&#160 Guess that’ll show me, won’t it?

UPDATE:&#160 Almost forgot – I mentioned something about the kids being worked too hard.

Was it just me, or did the Frogs’ defense look a step slow in getting off the ball?&#160 Not nearly as quick as they looked during the regular season.

If the Fiesta Bowl had been held only four days after New Mexico, I might understand.&#160 But these boys had over a month between games.&#160 Conventional wisdom dictates that they should have been flying to the ball every down, and that that pussy Kelli Moore should have been on his her ugly ass more often than not.&#160 One has to wonder if they were worn down from over-practicing.

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3) This ain’t 3A-11 anymore, Dalton.

Andy Dalton has played Oklahoma, TU, Iowa State, Baylor twice, plus Virginia & Clemson, not to mention BYU & Utah, neither of which is chopped liver.

Presumably, these programs all employ defensive coordinators who…I dunno…actually game plan&#160 for TCU.

So tell me how it is, Andy, that both times&#160 you’ve played Smurf Turf State, you’ve performed like a high-school sophomore.&#160 Are they not teaching you how to read defenses and audible at the line or something?

The sad fact is, Dalton, that TCU lost because you&#160 gave the game away.&#160 Your first interception provided the winning margin; your third interception sealed the Frogs’ fate.&#160 In between, you generally performed as if it was your very first college game.&#160 Not what we expect to see from a three-year starter – particularly one we were thinking might contend for the Heisman next year.

Fat chance of that now.

You have a lot of work to do on reading defenses, sir.&#160 Suggest you get to it.

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4) Eleven-on-eighteen still&#160 isn’t a fair fight.

The Fox Sports broadcast got a nice closeup of Dalton’s facemask getting grabbed & jerked around – no call.&#160 Jerry Hughes got held with the ball in the end zone on another play – no call.&#160 A Frog offsides call – wasn’t.&#160 The aforementioned Dalton first and third interceptions?&#160 Each was a damned good candidate for a pass interference call – except neither one got made.

In the meantime, as usual, TCU couldn’t so much as breathe&#160 on America’s Little Darlings&#153 without getting flagged.

Memo to the BCS:&#160 Maybe next time, you could schedule a little more professional crew to officiate the game.&#160 Say, my little boy’s Pop Warner league crew.

Bastards.

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Side note:&#160 The Cowboys’ playoff win against the Beagles counts.

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Last week:&#160 7-1.&#160 Final 2009-10 PFW record:&#160 61-27 (.693).&#160 Three (3) Perfect Football Weekends&#153 achieved.

That’s it for the Perfect Football Weekend&#153 for this year, Denizens.&#160 It’s been fun – well, for me, anyway; YMMV and all that.

The PFW – or, as the SpatulaGoddess&#153 called it, the Big XII report (grin) – will return in August 2010.&#160 (Well, can I help it that everyone on whom I keep tabs is there now?)

We now return you to your regularly scheduled ranting & raving…