Welcome to the Realm™ - Version 5.0...
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________





…aka the Pansy-Assed Football League.

Denizens, as we start this edition of the Perfect Football Weekend&#153, we are once again reminded of what a bunch of pussified doucherifles the state of Kalifornication has become.&#160 For now, their infectious cancer has touched youth football.

Usually, when a mercy rule becomes a bone of contention it’s because the policy isn’t instituted soon enough, until after a game is already far out of reach. Yet in one Northern California community the opposite is unfolding, with parents furious about a new rule that they feel is cheating their children and coaches of football and money wasted on fines.

As reported by Sacramento NBC affiliate KCRA, the Northern California Federation Youth Football League (NCFYFL) instituted stiff new penalties for any teams that beat opponents by 35 points or more. Specifically, those teams will be fined $200 and their coaches will be suspended from all league activities for two weeks. The penalty is a drastic change for the league of 7-13 year-olds, which previously issued teams with a warning following such blowouts and required a written description that detailed what the victorious team had done to try and keep scores low.

[…]

With the new, harsher penalties, some players have begun insisting that their development is being hurt. One team has stopped attempting any field goals, leaving kicker James McHugh unable to attempt any scoring kicks except points after touchdowns. That’s a problem for a 13-year-old who hopes to serve as a high school placekicker in fall 2014.

Oh, hell&#160 no.&#160 Actually, it’s a problem for any self-respecting human being.

Thankful am I that Skip doesn’t play in such a league.&#160 For if he did, and they passed a fucktarded rule like this, the head of said league would have the term “ass-whipping” re-defined for him.&#160 By me.

And speaking of ass-whippings, let’s get to the football.&#160 It’s my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets, destined to have their magical oh-fer season extended by the Aledo Bearcats.&#160 It’s Guaranteed Loss Night&#153, and the SpatulaLine&#153 is set at 65&#189 for this one.

Tomorrow morning, it’ll be Gary Patterson’s TCU Horned Frogs playing host to SMUT for the Iron Skillet.

And I shit you not – Vegas has the Frogs as an 18&#189-point favorite at home.

With Trevone Boykin at quarterback.

I think the Shitland Ponies win this one outright.&#160 Look for me to be extremely&#160 pissed come Monday.

Also Saturday, Turner Gill’s Liberty Flames take on Kentucky Weslyan, which is apparently such a small program that they don’t even have an ESPN listing.&#160 Flames win comfortably here.

Sunday finds Houston playing host to Golden Taint and the Seattle Seahags.&#160 If the Tex-annes can’t beat Baltimore without RAYYYYMONNNNND LEWWWWWWISSSSSSSS!!!!!, I rather doubt they’ll beat Seattle.&#160 Vegas doesn’t think so, either – the Hags are a 2&#189-point road favorite.

And for a bonus game, the Dallas Cowboys, fresh off a manhandling of the St. Louis Ewes, travel to Mrs. Venomous’ home of San Diego to take on the “San Dee-ayy-go…Superchar-gers…” (a little Chris Berman lingo, there).&#160 Vegas likes Dallas minus 2&#189, so look for the Powder-Blue-And_Gold to romp.

We’re back Monday with the recap.&#160 In the meantime…dang, I didn’t know OU’s Blake Bell could throw

_____________________________________________________

    
_______________
 
 
Glossary -  Disclaimer - Privacy Policy - History - The SpatulaFAQ
This blog is best viewed with your eyes. 
It helps, though, if you have Microsoft Internet Explorer  set about 1024x768 1280x1024 with your Favorites window activated on the left deactivated.  (At least until I can get a better handle on how WordPress works.)

(KORRIOTH:  Oh, great.  More wormholes.)

Mozilla Firefox doesn't do too badly, either; in fact, it's His Rudeness' browser of choice.
You can  use Nutscrape,  if you so desire - but why in blazes would you want to use a browser from a company that had to hide behind Janet El Reño's skirt to be successful?

And don't even  get me started on Opera or Chrome.  I'm not about  to trust any browser that won't let me change its color scheme.
Hacked by ZAKILOUP was based on WordPress platform 2.6 (it's 3.05 3.31 now), RSS tech , RSS comments design by Gx3.