Posted by Darth Venomous @ 16:13
This week’s edition of the Perfect Football Weekend kicks off…
MERLIN, KORRIOTH, OZY, K’HADIBAK’H, T-BONE, DR. FEELGOOD: CORRRRRNNNN…
MERLIN, KORRIOTH, OZY, K’HADIBAK’H, T-BONE, DR. FEELGOOD: …nnneeeee???
…kicks off with the NFL’s answer to pro wrestling’s Jim “Warrior Warrior Warrior Warrior Warrior…” Hellwig – that being The Receiver Formerly Known As Chad Johnson
Who, it says here, has officially changed his last name from Johnson to “Ocho Cinco”:
Two years ago, Johnson gave himself the moniker — a reference in Spanish to his No. 85 — and put it on the back of his uniform before a game. Quarterback Carson Palmer ripped it off before the kickoff. After the season, coach Marvin Lewis — who dislikes Johnson’s attention-getting stunts — referred to the receiver as “Ocho Psycho.”
Give that man a see-gar. You don’t get any more bang-on than that.
“It’s something I don’t think anyone has ever done before,” he told the team’s Web site.
Obviously the jerkweed has never heard of Rod Smart.
Let’s get on with the PFW. Tonight coach Steve Pate takes my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets down to Azle to play the Hornets. Azle always plays them tough, but Heights managed to eke out a 28-24 victory there last year. There is a temptation to have a letdown game after the Birdville victory last week, but it’s hard to imagine Azle giving them trouble after that. We’ll see.
Tomorrow, Turner Gill’s UBuffalo Bulls travel to Pitt to play Dave Wannstedt’s Panthers. I fear for the Bulls, as Pitt is still smarting from the embarassment against Bowling Green, so I’m not very hopeful here. The line is 14, so a 24-point loss (per the UBuffalo rule) will count.
Also tomorrow, the Oklahoma Sooners will be fed another sacrificial lamb, as Cincinnati’s Bearcats pay a visit. The line’s OU by 21½, so I expect Stoopes’ Troops to snore though a 10-point win.
Nebraska will host the San Jose State Aztecs in Lincoln tomorrow afternoon. San Jose’s not chopped liver, but Vegas likes Nebraska by 26½, and so do I. Bo Pelini will not let them lose focus after that mini-scare vs. W. Michigan.
Tomorrow evening, Bambi will face Godzilla as the Stephen F. Austin Lumberjacks of
Division I-AA the NCAA Football Championship Subdivision (*cough*) come to Fort Worth to play the Texas Christian Horned Frogs.
Just to give you an idea of what kind of game this is gonna be – Vegas doesn’t even have the game rated, but a line I saw on the Dullest Moaning Snooze had the Tadpoles favored by…uh…45.
Memo to Gary Patterson: You want to send a message to SMU
T here. Let the Shitland Ponies know what awaits them next week in two weeks.
UPDATE: Oops. Forgot about Stanford.
Sunday, the Dallas C’boys open the season in the Dog Pound at Cleveland. Based on what I saw of the Browns this preseason (and yes, HDD, I know preseason games don’t mean squat), I shouldn’t really be worried – which is why I won’t have any nails left by gametime. Dallas has this weird knack for playing down to the level of its competition, and it’d be the perfect excuse to have a letdown against Romeo Crennell’s bunch.
We’re back Monday for the recap. In the meantime…LC John Wardle, are the ‘Skins really that bad? I have their defense in my other fantasy league…
2 Comments to “PFW: The receiver formerly known as…”
Write a comment
You need to login, m'liege.