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Denizens, in this edition of the Perfect Football Weekend&#153, we’re going to integrate the lead-in with the actual schedule.

My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets have the Eastern Hills Highlanders (Highlanders?&#160 There can be only one, y’know) tonight at Farrington.&#160 It’s yet another Thursday game for the Jackets, who play six of their ten games this year on Thursday night.

Memo to the FWISD’s athletic department:&#160 They call it “Friday&#160 Night Lights” for a reason, y’know.

Anyway, Eastern Hills will be a tougher test for Heights, but not one they can’t handle.&#160 That is, unless they start gaping at the drill team up in the stands.&#160 Yowzah.

MRS. VENOMOUS (with cast-iron skillet):&#160 KA-BONGGGGGG!!!!!

…uh, ow.&#160

Saturday, 20th-ranked TCU finally learns whether it’s learned anything from the torching that Baylor’s (hack, spit) Donna-McCrabbs-wannabe, ARRRR GEEEE THREEEE!!!!1!!ONE!!11!, gave them.&#160 They’re at home against the Shitland Ponies of Stan & Muffy University, good ol’ SMUT, who like to throw the ball all over the lot.

TCU’s not a lock for this one (don’t let the -13 in the Vegas odds fool you), so don’t be surprised if I’m in a very&#160 snarly mood come Monday.

Oklahoma’s reward for handling Mizzou at home last Saturday?&#160 A drop to the number-two ranking, behind Swamp Gas U. out in Baton Rouge.&#160 (Memo to the AP:&#160 Mizzou’s better than West Virginia, mkay?&#160 I like LSU okay, but they do not&#160 deserve to be number one.)

Anyway, Stoops’ crew will take out their frustrations on Ball State, who comes to Norman to be a sacrificial lamb (Vegas is giving them 38, and that’s not gonna be near&#160 enough).&#160 Expect the second team early in this one.

Bo Pelini’s eighth-ranked Nebraska Cornuskers have it toughest of all.&#160 They get to go to Camp Randall Stadium to play seventh-ranked Bucky.&#160 I’d pay money to go see this one.

Bucky’s a 9&#189-point favorite here, which is sort of an insult to the Huskers.&#160 Field goal decides this one.

Sunday, Nick Fairley makes his debut in the Detroit defensive line.&#160 Right next to Ndamukong Suh.&#160 And Kyle Vanden Bosch.

And it would&#160 be against Dallas.&#160 (sigh)&#160 Sorry, sportz fanz – the Cowgirlz don’t win this one.

Elsewhere, Turner Gill’s swiss-cheese secondary gets roasted, as Texas Tech comes a-calling to give Rock Chalk a royal spanking.&#160 Vegas is being generous – they’re only favoring Tech by 6&#189.&#160 Mheh.

We’re back Monday with the recap.&#160 And I’m kinda glad HDD isn’t around right now – he might wanna put money on Husker-Bucky…


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One response to “PFW&#160: Thursday&#160 night lights…?”

  1. LC Purple Raider says:

    Good luck at Madison, that place is a madhouse.

    And due to all the Eurogirls, it doesn’t smell that good either.

    Detroit’s defense isn’t THAT good, but my goodness the offense.

    The Cowgirlz will be lucky to keep it within 10.

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