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Denizens, you guys are pretty much aware that I’m not exactly&#160 the most loyal fan that Jerry “Owner Jethro” Jones has ever had.

But as we begin this episode of the Perfect Football Weekend&#153, I can’t help but think that – at some point – piling on is piling on.

I mean, he already caught enough crap for the seating brouhaha at Super Bowl XLV – never mind it was the NFL’s fault, he was the one that got royally bashed for it.&#160 And that was after his miserable-assed attempt to see to it that his team was the first to ever host one.

But now the idiots are beginning to come out of the woodwork.&#160 Call it Hot Coffee In The Lap, Part the Deuxth:

Jennelle Carrillo is suing Jones and the team after attending the Blue & Silver scrimmage at Cowboys Stadium way back in August 2010. Carrillo claims she parked herself on a bench outside the facility and endured third-degree burns on her buttocks.

“Prior to entering the seated area of Cowboys stadium, plaintiff sat down on a black, marble bench outside of and near entrance ‘E’ to the stadium,” the lawsuit reads, via CBSSports.com. “The bench was uncovered and openly exposed to the extremely hot August sun. The combination of the nature of the black, marble bench and hot sunlight caused the bench to become extremely hot and unreasonably dangerous. … As a result of sitting on the bench, plaintiff suffered third degree burns to her buttocks.”

Okay, you got all this, Denizens?&#160 Marble&#160 bench.&#160 Exposed to the sun all day.&#160 In August.

And now for your money quote:

Carillo’s lawsuit hinges on her claim that the “defendants knew or reasonably should have known that the material used to construct the bench would become unreasonably hot when exposed to the August sun.”

You.&#160 Can’t.&#160 Be.&#160 Fucking.&#160 Serious.

She’s claiming that Jerruh & the Dallas C’boys should have known that her delicate, tender hiney&#160 couldn’t withstand a surface on which you could probably slow-cook an egg?

Well, if Jerry “should have known” it…would someone please&#160 tell me why the ever-loving hell&#160 it is that she&#160 didn’t?&#160 Hmmmmmmmmmm?????

Fuck the euphemisms. That’s one stupid cunt, right there.

Speaking of Jerry’s team, they’re in action tonight as they travel to San Diego’s Jack Murphy Qualcomm Snapdragon Whatever-the-hell-it’s-named-today Stadium to take on the Chargers.&#160 Witten’s got a lacerated spleen, Ware’s got a tweaked hammy, Romo and the rest of the bunch will only play a couple series, so I’m not expecting much.

It is&#160 live football, though, so what the hell.

We’re back Monday or so with the recap.&#160 In the meantime…the search for HDD continues…


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2 responses to “PFW:&#160 Hot + black + burned someone = lawsuit”

  1. David Hartung says:

    Methinks that this lawsuit is yet another filed because the plaintiff knows that the insurance companies will settle rather than litigate, if the settlement amount is less that what it would cost to go to court. I am aware of at least one case in which the plaintiff’s case was a bald faced lie, the lie was discovered in a deposition, and she still got money.

  2. LC Purple Raider says:

    She should get what her hiney is worth, mainly $20 an hour.

    When I left Sandy Eggo, it was still Jack Murphy Stadium.

    Quallcom is what they were calling it up till 5 years ago.

    Your guess is truly as good as mine.

    Cowgirls get beat, film at eleven.

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