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[Scene:&#160 the bridge of Pegasus, where Korrioth, K’hadibak’h, Merlin, Ozymandias McCool and T-Bone McManx anxiously await the arrival of Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant™ from the daily PC wars.&#160 (PC, in this case, standing for “Personal Computer”.)&#160 His Rudeness™ was suppoesd to write the PFW post today, and nothing’s come in to this point.&#160 Korrioth is visibly upset, fearing the worst – that something’s happened to Spats and that he’ll&#160 have to start writing the damned things.]


KORRIOTH:&#160 Scan for any ships in the area, Tactical!

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 Captain, I have…

KORRIOTH:&#160 DON’T START WITH ME, LIEUTENANT!!!

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 …already been scanning continuously since you gave the original order.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Oh.&#160 Very good, then.&#160 Report!

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 Still nothing on sensors, Captain…wait.&#160 Small blip coming into extreme sensor range, traveling at warp 5.

[Two minutes later…]

KORRIOTH:&#160 Report, Lieutenant.

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 Contact IDs being received now…It’s the admiral, Captain, transmitting his personal warp signature…

[Korrioth breathes a sigh of relief.&#160 It’s short-lived.]

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 …he’s in the Hum-a-Zoo, sir.

[Korrioth blanches.&#160 His Rudeness™ had&#160 gone out in his personal Talon-class fighter Phoenix.]

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 No…wait.&#160 It’s not the Hum-a-Zoo, Captain.

[Korrioth starts to breathe another sigh of relief, then goes bug-eyed as he realizes that there’s only one thing that could mean…]

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 It’s the prototype.

[The prototype, For the Uninitiated™, is the precursor to the Hum-a-zoo, the absolute worst ship that His Rudeness™ will let go on patrols.&#160 And the prototype is worse.&#160 It’s a warp-core breach waiting to happen.]

KORRIOTH:&#160 Open a channel, McManx.

T-BONE MCMANX:&#160 Open.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Pegasus&#160 to prototype, respond, please.

LSIK&T:&#160 Pegasus, this is the prototype, Spatula here.

[Spats doesn’t sound too happy.&#160 Korrioth actually cringes.]

KORRIOTH:&#160 Admiral…are you all right?

LSIK&T (very&#160 snippy):&#160 I’m fine, Kor – but I want that half-assed excuse-for-a-wizard’s commission re-activated and his lazy ass transferred back to the shipyards to whip some of those fuckheads into something resembling shape before we go on another hunting mission, is that clear???

[Both Korrioth & Merlin gulp audibly.&#160 Merlin looks as scared as anyone’s ever seen him.]

KORRIOTH:&#160 Acknowledged, Admiral.&#160 Stand by for landing inside the shuttle bay.

Sorry, Denizens.&#160 Running a little behind schedule as of late.&#160 Let’s get on with the PFW.

My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets have their last game of the year (at least, we hope) against the North Side Steers tonight at 7:30.&#160 Heights will win this game, no doubt, as North Side’s 0-8 and couldn’t beat a middle school team.&#160 If Heights should screw this one up, however, expect coach Duke Christian to be “reassigned”.

Tomorrow, the Horned Frogs of Texas Christian will play host to fellow Mountain West Conference foe New Mexico.&#160 Just to show you how close the game is, as well as how far the Froggies have fallen – TCU’s a 3&#189-point favorite.&#160 Remember that home field is worth 3 points, and there you go.&#160 I personally think the Lobos are gonna win.

Also, Turner Gill’s UBuffalo Bulls will travel to the Former Land of Rothelisberger, the U of Miami (Ohio).&#160 The Bulls are only a 6&#189-point dog here, but they still need to learn to play a decent opponent on the road.&#160 I doubt UBuffalo will either win or cover.

Fifth-ranked Oklahoma gets some good home cooking against the woeful Aggies of Texas A&M, led by their mercenary coach, Dennis “Inside Info” Franchione.&#160 We’re gonna make this a double, since it’s one of my teams against one of my Anti-Teams™.

MERLIN:&#160 So why wasn’t TCU-TU a double?

LSIK&T:&#160 How’d you like to go back to the shipyards without benefit of a ship?

MERLIN:&#160 Eep.

Third-ranked LSU will take part in the first official Saban Bowl™ tomorrow when they travel to Tuscaloosa to take on the 17th-ranked Alabama Crimson Tied.&#160 Now, I’ve all but forgiven Bama for the Franchione fiasco, but I wouldn’t mind here if LSU made them pay a bit for hiring their old head coach.&#160 They’re a 7&#189-point favorite.

Sunday evening, we’ll join Madden, Michaels and Keith Olberdouche back at the studio as the Dallas Cowboys travel to the City of Brotherly Shove, Phuckadelphia, to play the Beagles and The World’s Greatest Quarterback Ever In The History Of Ever, Ever (Just Ask Him)™, Donna McFlabb, son of that ugly-assed fat hog Wilma.

Just a clue for Donna:&#160 Those wheels of yours ain’t what they used to be – and we’ve gotten a lot better on defense.&#160 Ain’t gonna be no more 29-second scrambles for you, chumpette.

(Oh, by the way – did you guys hear where Fat Boy Reid’s kid is in trouble again?&#160 Or where a judge called Fat Boy’s house a “drug emporium”?&#160 Makes you wonder if any of Fat Boy’s other&#160 kids (read: the ones who play for him) have been hopped up at one time or other?)

We’re back Monday (Tuesday?) for the recap.&#160 In the meantime, somebody get LC leoni2 over here, so I can laugh in his face when his Beagles get spayed.&#160


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(KORRIOTH:  Oh, great.  More wormholes.)

Mozilla Firefox doesn't do too badly, either; in fact, it's His Rudeness' browser of choice.
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And don't even  get me started on Opera or Chrome.  I'm not about  to trust any browser that won't let me change its color scheme.
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