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(Or, Never Mind The Dog – Beware Of Owner! (grin))
Mrs. Venomous is…uh, shall we say…reticent  around the preferred method of defense in the Realm™.
RAYEGUN:  Y’mean, she’s afraid of guns?
VENOMOUS:  A severe character flaw, I know.
MRS. VENOMOUS (with skillet):  WHAT?!?!?!?!?!
MERLIN:  And you married her despite this?
MRS. VENOMOUS (with skillet):  
VENOMOUS:  Gentlemen, may I suggest you start running now?  I’ll finish the post whilst you save your asses.
MRS. VENOMOUS (with skillet):  Grrrrrrrr…
Anyway, the Department of Improvisation™ relates to us the story of this Florida couple who demonstrates to us that one doesn’t always need a firearm to defend oneself.
Things just didn’t pan out for whoever invaded 81-year-old Bobby Smith’s Jacksonville home Saturday afternoon.
In fact, you might say the robber got the point – literally – after the Korean War Navy veteran was through with him.
Smith and his caregiver used a pan full of fried potatoes and a pitchfork to drive the attacker away. A compact man with a close-trimmed gray haircut, Smith said he wasn’t scared.
“I was angry; I was upset; and I was as mad as all outdoors,” Smith said Wednesday. “If I’d had my gun, like I normally would have, I would have shot him because he was in my home. I don’t like people hurting my family or my home.”
Now there’s  Castle Doctrine™ for you.  Get the point?
ALL:  Ew.  Just, ew.
Now, if y’all will excuse me, I have a frying pan to actively avoid…
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2 responses to “Improvisational defense…of sorts”
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- It helps, though, if you have Microsoft Internet Explorer
set about 1024x7681280x1024 with your Favorites windowactivated on the leftdeactivated. (At least until I can get a better handle on how WordPress works.)
(KORRIOTH: Oh, great. More wormholes.)
Mozilla Firefox doesn't do too badly, either; in fact, it's His Rudeness' browser of choice. -
You can use
Nutscrape,
if you so desire - but why in blazes would you want to use a browser from a company that had to hide behind Janet El Reño's skirt to be successful?
And don't even get me started on Opera or Chrome. I'm not about to trust any browser that won't let me change its color scheme.
Given her apparent skill with the cast iron skillet, does Mrs. Venomous really *need* firearms? 🙂
Not all are on Mr. Smith’s side.
“By grewupinjax | 04/16/11 – 02:20 pm Don’t believe everything you read.I know this man who is made to look like a hero in this article.He lives in this house because after marrying my elderly mother,he abused and neglected her until she ended up in a nursing home penniless and near death.She put a lot of money into this house over the years,and Bobby Smith robbed her of the house and her life savings. This is a mean and abusive person whom I have known to tell many,many lies,and I seriously doubt the credibility of his story.”
He couldn’t be so dumb as to be the perp, would he?
And please watch for incoming frying pans.