Posted by Darth Venomous @ 23:28
Hey, Artie Briles! Hey, Widdle Bwice Pussy!
Not quite as fucking easy when it isn’t your hand-picked zebras calling the game, is it, you pathetic bastards?!?!?!
Baylor was penalized 18 times for a Big 12-record 215 yards. Seven were for pass interference.
Live by the zebra, die by the zebra.
Gotta. Love. It.
Posted by David Hartung @ 6:19
It does happen. this past Saturday, not only did the MSU Bulldogs decisively beat Texas A&M(48-31), but Ole Miss beat number one ranked Alabama 32-17. For the first time since 1962 Ole Miss is 5 and 0, and the last time both teams were rankle in the top 15 at the same time was the 1950s. Needless to say, Mississippi college football fans are in a very good mood. From a Mississippi standpoint, about the only thing that could have made it better would be if our other major university had managed a win; unfortunately, Southern Mississippi seems to be rebuilding this year.
From the standpoint of the Vicar’s family, Mrs. Vicar grew up near Pittsburgh, and the Vicar grew up in Wisconsin, and both of us are USAF veterans. Air Force beat Navy 30-21, and both Green bay and Pittsburgh NFL Teams won.
The question is, can we do it twice in a row, Mississippi State plays Auburn this coming Saturday at Scott Field in Starkville, both teams are undefeated, but Auburn is a 2.5 point favourite. Ole Miss will travel to Texas to play the Aggies, the hope here is that they will win so decisively, that the Aggies develop a complex about Mississippi!
We shall see!
Posted by David Hartung @ 11:50
It would have been a good weekend, it seems that Green Bay delivered a sound drubbing to Chicago(38-17). The downside is that Mrs. Vicar’s Steelers managed to pull defeat from the jaws of victory, losing to Tampa Bay 24-27.
Posted by David Hartung @ 9:18
For those who do not follow SEC sports, Death Valley is what schools in the South Eastern Conference call the LSU home stadium in Baton Rouge. The reason? Louisiana State University has not lost a home game since 2008. That six year streak came to an end last evening when unranked Mississippi State beat number 8 LSU 34-29. The moral of the story is that is never pays to underestimate the Mississippi State Bulldogs.
Despite his best efforts, the Vicar finds himself becoming interested in college football.
Posted by David Hartung @ 11:18
I wasn’t watching the game real close, and cannot give a play t by play, A couple of things which got my attention:
MSU elected to receive, and managed to score within the first 3 minutes of the game.
Saturday was the SEC channel’s first weekend and about the only glitch was really beyond their control. The Arkansas/Auburn game was on weather delay when the MIS/USM game began, and when play resumed, they cut back to Auburn/Arkansas for about 15 minutes.
The odds makers predicted MSU by 31 and we almost had that covered by halftime.
On a humorous note, on one play, the play interference was actually one of the referees. Dak Prescott threw the ball and the ref couldn’t get out of the way in time, and was caught between two potential receivers. Picture a maroon sandwich with a stripped filling. The ref was shook up, but was able to continue the game.
The only real problem with the high scoring game is that the Vicar had bought Mrs.Vicar a cowbell, and with every score that dang thing was rung, and rung loudly!
The current line on today’s game against Auburn is MSU by 28.
Posted by David Hartung @ 12:57
Michael Sam is now a Dallas Cowboy.
Posted by David Hartung @ 20:48
Mississippi State was favored over Southern Mississippi by 31 points. If we can keep Southern from scoring, we have the spread covered.
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 7:09
Denizens, the “decision” to which I had referred back in April (yeah, yeah, I know…some “next few days”, eh, Venomous?) was going to be to close This Fine Blog. I have neither the time, nor inclination anymore, to write.
I have a new house. The workload at my job is ponderous. Ponderous, man, fuckin’ ponderous! (a little Casey Kasem lingo, there) And not to put too fine a point on it…certain in the Blogosphere have proven to me that it’s not worth putting up with it.
But, having said all that…I still have one last Perfect Football Weekend season left in me.
Those of you who’ve read me for any length of time know that about this time every year, I start jonesing for football (not to be confused with Jerry Jonesing for football, which means making stupid-assed decisions year after year, thinking having a Victoria’s Secret© at AT&T Stadium is more important than having a winning football team on that house’s field, that sort of thing), which means everything & everyone else take back seats.
So here we are. Once more through the breech, dear friends.
Same rules as always: I follow my teams here, you follow your teams in comments. I don’t give two flying fucks at rolling donut holes how your teams do – just how mine do. And the football weekend isn’t Perfect unless all my teams win. (Unless I declare Executive Fiat, which will always come with an explanation.)
Here are the teams I’m following:
1. High school: The (Fort Worth) Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets. Year Two for Phil Young and the Jackets, and the good news this year is that Aledo (a 7-84 loss last year) is not on the schedule. Thus, a 5-5 playoff team from last year looks to have a better season. They start with White Settlement Brewer (wait, not Azle? not Birdville?) in four weeks.
2. College: The Texas Christian University Horned Frogs. Year Three in the Big
12 11 10 However Many There Are for Gary Patterson and the Tadpoles. GP still has the delustional idea that Trevone Boykin is a quarterback, so look for another 4-8 year or so. But he has a couple of new offensive co-coordinators, and he still has a decent enough defense, so we’ll see what happens. Now to see which teams are crappy enough to lose to them…
3. Pro: The Dallas Cowboys. Another year, another Sean Lee season-ending injury – this time before training camp even starts. His knee, of course. Thus, a defense that was already suspect is probably going to be just as bad this year.
One more new piece for the offensive line, plus a new play caller (Scott Linehan), and they’ll have to keep the Cowgirls in games again.
Look for 6-10, and Jason “Red-Headed Jebus” Garrett’s exit from the franchise shortly thereafter.
In addition, this year we’ll play things a little differently. I’ll pick one or two games at random that interest me – some from past PFW teams, some from teams that have never shown up here before. (Look for Turner Gill’s Liberty University team a lot here. And anytime I sense that one of my least favorite teams is going to get their heads kicked in – you know, SMU, Arkansas, Boise State, that sort – it’ll show up in the list.)
Now, I was hoping to at least have a blurb about the Hall of Fame Game in Canton prior to publication, but that home thing reared its ugly head again. So I’ll just mention that the NY Football Douchebags beat Buffalo last night – seriously, who doesn’t beat Buffalo? – and leave it at that.
We’ll return Thursday with the first installment of the season, when I rip the Hall of Fame committee (or whomever picks these guys) for one of their stupid-assed selections.
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 16:20
The No Fuckingballs League announced the Pro Football Hall of Fame’s 2014 class last night.
Now, it’s bad enough that widdle Mikey “Gap Toof” Strahan gets in. He owns a “record” for sacks that Brett “Hey, Jenn, lookit my balls” Favre laid down – literally – to give him. No respect for players like that at all.
But, when Aeneas Effing Williams of the Phoeniz Cardinals (yeah – that piss-poor excuse-for-a-football-team) gets in, with zero Super Bowl rings, while Charles Haley (only player in NFL history with (ahem) five) gets snubbed again…
Fuck you, NFL writers. You pissweasels are as irrelevant as the bastards who dish out the Nobel Peace Prize.
Posted by David Hartung @ 7:03
It seems that the price people are willing to pay for tickets to the Super bowl have been going down, the current price being just under $1800 a head. Even this *low* price is out of reach to most Americans. In addition, it seems that the lowest price tickets for regular season tickets are about a hundred dollars. With the average player salary being about $1.9 million dollars, pro football is most assuredly not a poor man’s game.
While I personally would not be caught dead paying these prices to be entertained, I have no quarrel with those who do. However I do have a question. Professional athletes and other top rank entertainers make a tremendous amount of money working in a vocation which really contributes very little to our society, and the left has no problem; Let a man who runs a company which provides jobs to tens of thousands of people make the same money, and the left screams bloody murder. Where is the logic here?
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 19:19
Something I caught whilst watching the NBC pregame show just now:
The slogan: “Subway – Where winners eat”.
And whom just happens to be one of their spokesmorons?
Why, none other than ARRRRRRR GEEEEEEE OH-AND-THREEEEEEEEE!!!
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 23:59
Well, Denizens, now that the Texas
s stRangers are well on their way to Oblivion (six games out of first as of this writing, and falling), it’s finally time to turn our attention to the Official Sport of the Realm…
MERLIN: Running libdouches through with bayonets?
OZY McCOOL: Knocking them upside the head with spiked maces?
KORRIOTH: Feeding them to the Sarlacc on Tattooine?
Ah, I love my job.
No, guys, it’s time to crank up the phenomonon known around these parts as the Perfect Football Weekend.
If you’ve been reading me for any length of time – and yes, I know, that’s only about Six or Seven of you – then you know what this is about: Every Thursday or Friday or so during football season, I chronicle the exploits of my favorite football teams – “hah skrewl” (a little Rush lingo, there), college & pro. I size up their games for a given weekend…and if my teams all win, it’s a PFW.
Occasionally, at my whim and mine alone, I will declare a PFW by Executive Fiat – usually because a team I hate with The Purplest Of Passions gets their heads handed to them (yes, even if it’s by one point). More on that later.
(And as usual, I don’t give two shits about your teams – that’s what the comments are for, of course. Knock yerselfs out. You people who are reading this and would like to get in on it – now’s a good time to get an account set up here. Email me. (Link on the right sidebar.))
Now, back in February, I promised that changes were coming – and, so help me Cthulhu, I bloody well meant what I said.
(Once again, Denizens, let me acknowledge For The Record that the World At Large does not revolve around me. I’m perfectly aware that all this angst-filled rhetoric has the net effect of a gnat’s fart in a whirlwind. This is as much for my entertainment as it is for yours, mkay?
Bite Sue me.)
With all that in mind, here are the teams I’m following in 2013:
High school: The (Fort Worth, TX) Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets. I kept seeing indications that Ged Kates was coming back to coach the Jackets, and my heart raced. But it sounded too good to be true, especially after the disaster that was the Todd Whitten era.
Then I went to this FWISD page, and got my answer.
Arlington Heights High School has selected Philip Young to serve as the new Head Football Coach. Coach Young graduated from Texas Tech where he played football on teams that played in the Independence Bowl in 1986 and the Coca Cola Bowl in Tokyo, Japan in 1988. While completing graduate work in History, he worked as a graduate assistant coach for two years at Rice University. He later coached at the University of North Texas from 1991 to 1994. Later, Coach Young started coaching and teaching at Denton Liberty Christian High School was part of two state championship teams. He also coached two state championship games as the offensive coordinator at Gainesville High School, winning the title in 2003. Before joining the Arlington Heights High School staff this year, Coach Young also served as head coach at Cleburne High School.
Okay, then. Best of luck to you, Coach Young. You’ve got a near-empty cupboard with which to work, so I don’t envy you. Let’s see what you can do.
College: The Texas Christian University Horned Frogs. It’s Year Two of the Big XII experiment for Gary Patterson’s bunch, and even though there was once again attrition that we didn’t really want to see, this group should be better able to handle it.
Josh Boyce & Stansley Maponga took their talents to the NFL – Boyce through graduation (apparently, he was a senior when I thought he was a junior), Maponga through listening to some fool agent who convinced him that he’d done all he could at TCU.
Devonte Fields will take over as the Defensive End To Stop – he already has a Big XII Defensive Player Of The Year under his belt, and should only get better. Jason Verrett & Sam Carter return to anchor a secondary that helped TCU lead the Big XII in defense last year
Casey Pachall is back, and even though Coach P is being coy about who will start against LSU, conventional wisdom dictates that Pachall is a better quarterback right now than Trevone Boykin. He’ll have Waymon James & B.J. Catalon to hand off to, and Cam White, LaDarius Brown & Bailey Desormeaux to throw to (and why Desormeaux isn’t playing for LSU, I’ve no idea).
It’s about a month to LSU at the Death Star, and we’ll find out a lot about this group in a hurry right about then.
College: The Liberty University Flames. It’s Year Two for Turner Gill as well at Jerry Falwell University, and things are looking up:
Seniors Kevin Fogg and Richard Wright have been named to 2013 Phil Steele Preseason FCS All-American teams, while 13 players are among those listed by the organization in its preseason all-conference lists.
Both Fogg and Wright were named to the Phil Steele Preseason FCS All-American first-team listing, with Fogg grabbing a spot on the team as a kickoff return specialist and Wright at long snapper.
Liberty was the only Big South program to have two first-team honorees on the Phil Steele listing. Players from Gardner-Webb (one second-team and one fourth-team) and Coastal Carolina (both third-team) were also named to the FCS All-American listing.
The first game is vs. Kent State in about one month’s time. As usual, Liberty will be under the SpatulaLine, getting points when they appear way overmatched.
Pros: The Houston Texans. It’s time the Southern Command got some love from HQ, and I’m sick & tired of Cowgirl mediocrity, so the Texans get the nod this year.
Matt Schaub is back at QB, Arian Foster runs the ball, Andre Johnson catches it, and JJ Watt will anchor the defense. It got them a 12-4 record & an AFC South championship last year, and there’s no reason why they shouldn’t be a contender this year as well.
More teams may be added to this mix as I see fit, or not. In the meantime, this is a good group.
First games are next weekend, and I have a helluva story to launch with, so watch this space.
In the meantime, I’ll leave you with this.
Here’s to football!
UPDATE: Oops – almost forgot.
The team that I hate with the Purplest of Passions…
K’HADIBAK’H: You mean, besides SMU & TU?
VENOMOUS: Something like that.
…is the Penn State Nittany Lions.
For the way they dragged Joe Paterno’s name though the mud, they are on the Eternal Shit List. Anytime they lose, it doesn’t matter what any of the rest of my teams have done – I will declare a PFW by Executive Fiat, because they got their asses kicked.
Now let’s go have some fun!
Posted by David Hartung @ 10:16
Though I am not the big Football fan in this forum, I must point out that Mississippi State goes into this weeks match-up against Alabama with a 7 and 0 record. This is the second time since 1895(the start of MSU football) that the school has accomplished such a feat. I think it safe to say that Dan Mullens is doing a god job.
Unfortunately, Alabama is also undefeated and against them MSU cannot afford to take a quarter off, like they did against Middle Tennessee. They are going to have to play 4 quarters of all out quality football, if they hope to repeat the results of 1980.
Posted by David Hartung @ 18:15
Last evening, in the last seconds of the Mississippi State, University of Tennessee game, we saw this:
State was already three points up, all they had to do was to keep the ball away from UT. As luck would happen, this guy was open, and State won 41-31. We are now 6 and 0. Next week, we have a chance to be 7 and 0. The following week we play Alabama. On that game, all bets are off.
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 22:21
Not quite as easy when your All-Universe offense is going against an experienced defense, is it?