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Denizens, as we begin this edition of the Perfect Football Weekend, we are amused that Joseph “Lightfingers” Randle simply Can.  Not.  Keep.  His.  Mouth.  Shut™.

Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Dez Bryant and running back Joseph Randle got into an argument as the media was entering the practice field Friday.

Bryant did not divulge what the argument was about when asked after practice, but a source said it was related to a comment Randle made during the running back’s arrest earlier this month in reference to a July 2012 incident involving Bryant and the receiver’s mother.

[...]

“Dez didn’t miss no games for slapping his mama,” Randle said in the video, obtained by KDFW-TV, that was taken while he was being booked after stealing underwear and a tester bottle of cologne form a Dillard’s in Frisco, Texas.

Randle was wondering aloud if he’d be suspended by the team for the shoplifting arrest.

Bastard shoulda been cut – especially after coughing up the ball the other night against the Foreskins.

In the video, Randle also made a comment about Josh Brent, who was convicted of vehicular manslaughter for his involvement in an accident that led to the death of teammate and friend Jerry Brown in 2012.

“Josh Brent, he’s still up in the locker room. He was driving drunk. That’s stupid,” Randle said.

[...]

Randle made other flippant remarks while being booked, including asking a female jail employee if she would give him a massage if he paid her $100 and asking why his height and weight were not on his mug shot.

Asshole thinks he’s a hot shit, when he’s not even among the top three running backs at Valley Ranch.

Dumbass.

Let’s get on with the football.  My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets, having all but won District 7-5A, have to fight against a letdown tonight when they play the Trimble Tech Bulldogs here in a little bit.  South Hills handled the Green & White pretty easily a couple of weeks ago, so I expect Heights to roll here.

Tomorrow afternoon, Gary Patterson’s seventh-ranked TCU Horned Frogs have what will probably be their toughest test, as they’re in Morgantown to play the 20th-ranked West Virginia Mountaineers.

How tough?  WVA gave Baylor what should have been their second consecutive loss – had it not been for the LIttle Darlings™′ hand-picked zebras a couple weeks ago.

TCU’s a 5½-point road fave, which means it’ll come down to Jaden Overkrom, most likely.

Sunday, it should be a near-walkover for the Cincy Bengals, as Andy Dalton’s crew hosts the worst team in the NFL, namely the Jacksonville Jaguars.

Running back Giovani Bernard is out for the Black & Orange; hopefully, that won’t make much of a difference.  AJ Green returns, though, so that should get them through.

The wildcards this week will be 18th-ranked Oklahoma taking out their frustrations on Iowa State, 3rd-ranked Auburn at 4th-ranked Ole Miss (I’m going out on a limb on this one), and Indiana for the upset special at Michigan (trust me, sportz fanz – Brady Hoke is on his way out).

With any luck, we’ll have a timely recap this week. In the meantime…the crumb-crunchers are about to start knocking at my door, so… 

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RCOB WARNING!

I spent eleven years of my life standing in the defence of our nation’s constitution, and I understand that the General served for even longer. That document was written to provide the government necessary for a civil society, and at the same time to protect us from being oppressed by that government. More and more it seems that our government does not care about the document which is supposed to be our supreme law. Read this, and try to keep your temper.

It seems that after a routine traffic stop, the police in a New Mexico town decided that the driver had drugs concealed within his body. They took him to the local hospital, did anal probes, gave him enemas and forced him to defecate in front of hospital staff and the police. All this without a warrant. After finding no drugs, the driver was released and the hospital sent him the bill.

General, remind me again why we served?

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Okay, now that we’ve had another mass shooting, let’s go through the liberal checklist, shall we?

* White Anglo Saxon Protestant, che…oh, wait.

* Christian, che…oh, wait.

* Teaba…oh, wait.

Due to the excessive availability of guns, che…oh, wait.

Hmmm…looks like the libtard narrative is being found to be somewhat wanting, isn’t it?

Well, leftist doucherifles, you may rest assured of one thing:  You still  can’t have my guns.  Don’t even think  about it.

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Y’know, Denizens, usually I’m in whole-hearted agreement with the good folks over at Downtrend.com – they’re a conservative, anti-Bambi lot whose words I often enjoy reading.

But not this time.

Rapper 2 Chainz and his entire entourage were arrested on drug charges Tuesday, after their bus was stopped for having a broken tail light. After smelling traces of weed and seeing smoke in the bus, the police felt this was enough “probable cause” to search the vehicle.

Got news for you, Nathan Eyre:  the police were right.  Visible smoke, combined with the scent of pot does, indeed, constitute probable cause.

Ain’t no “felt”, nor sneer-quotes about it.

Aw, come on! Is that all you got?! >

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DIE, SWINE, DIE!!!!! 

Justice.

Buford.  T.  Justice.

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Denizens, since I don’t feel like writing at the moment, go read this from the good Professor (actually, his associate Andrew Branca) over at Legal Insurrection.

Be prepared to do a helluva  lotta head-shaking.

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(Hat tip:  Fox News – specifically, Hemmer & McCallum.)

Giving new meaning to the name “Hotel California”

Prisoners in Fremont, Calif., sentenced on misdemeanor charges can fulfill their prison stays in an isolated, less-crowded section of the city jail – for a price.

The new “Pay to Stay” program is new to Fremont, but not new to California, said Geneva Bosques, a spokeswoman for the Fremont Police Department. Similar programs, for example, exist in Southern California.

During sentencing deliberations, people can apply to be enrolled in the program. In order to gain approval from the judge, one would have to pass a health screening, which includes a TB test, and a background check to ensure that they do not have a violent past. Once an application is approved and a onetime $45 fee is collected, the inmate can stay in this “quiet” prison for $155 a night.”

“Mirrors on the ceiling, pink champagne on ice, and she said, ‘We are all just prisoners here…of our own device…’” 

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Denizens, don’t let anyone fool you:  The Second Civil War has been on for quite some time, albeit in a cold sort of way.

Looks like that’s about to change, however.  A security guard for the Family Research Council is the latest vicitim.

The armed man who walked into the Washington headquarters of the Family Research Council and reportedly shot a security guard Wednesday morning has been identified as Floyd Corkins, 28, of Virginia, NBC News reports.

Corkins was taken into custody by the FBI following the shooting and was being interviewed.

Sources told Fox News that after guard took away his gun, the suspect said, “Don’t shoot me, it was not about you, it was what this place stands for.”

Perkins was an outspoken defender of Chick-fil-A President Dan Cathy’s public stand against same-sex marriage, which made the fast-food chain a flashpoint in the nation’s culture wars. The Cathy family foundation has funded the Family Research Council.

There you have it.  The little chickenshit thought he was going to go into FRC and shoot up the place.  Thanks be to God for the security guard who upset the princess’ little applecart.

As for you, libtard pussies, you’ve sown the wind – you’re one step closer to reaping the whirlwind.

You bastards think you’re such hot shits?  We still outnumber you, and  we outgun you.

And you’re coming dangerously close to the day when we say “fuck it, and you”.

ThatIsAll™.

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Y’know, Denizens, the surprise is not that Rodney King finally kicked the bucket (he was 47).

The surprise is that – given his continued history with drugs & alcohol and making seemingly continuous appearances in the judicial system – it took so long for him to finally go.

(Incidentally, that’s the reason for the category – where else would I put it?  I don’t feel like memorializing him, and I don’t hate him at all, so “Good riddance” is inappropriate, as well.)

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Denizens, today is supposed to be the Bloggers’ Day of Silence in protest for what’s being done to fellow blogger Aaron Walker by He Whom Will Always  Be Known As The “Speedway Bomber”™, aka limp-wristed chickenshit short-bussed pusstard Brett Kimberlin, the Boil To End All Boils On The Collective Ass Of Society™.

I haven’t blogged, of course, not because of that cowardly faggot Kimberlin – but because I’m up to my ass in work.

C’est la vie.

Nevertheless, I support the effort – and Aaron, soon as I can find some loose change, guy, it’ll be on its way to you.

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Denizens, your homework assignment for the weekend is to read this treatise by Zilla of the Resistance.  (It’s a long read, which is why you have all weekend.)  Additional information can also be obtained here and here.

(Yes, that last one is a link to Malicious Malkin’s column, but there’s a reason for it.  Don’t get ahead of me, mkay?)

Today is “Everybody Blog About Brett Kimberlin Day” in the Blogosphere.  This chickenshit needs to be put down like the rabid dog he is, and together we can all play a part in doing so.

Oh, and Kimberlin?  Fuck you, you pussified douchetard.  Try coming after me or mine, and I’ll see to it you don’t go after anyone else.

Bank on that, chickenshit.

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Question for you, Denizens:  Ever passed a cop running a speed trap & flashed your headlights afterwards to warn oncoming drivers?

Ever get a ticket for it?

Well, now you might actually have a case.

A judge in Sanford ruled Tuesday that a Lake Mary man was lawfully exercising his First Amendment rights when he flashed his headlights to warn neighbors that a deputy had set up a speed trap nearby.

That decision is another victory for Ryan Kintner, 25, who sued theSeminole County Sheriff’s Officelast year, accusing it of misconstruing a state law and violating his civil rights, principally his right to free speech.

He was ticketed Aug. 10 by a Seminole County deputy, but Kintner alleges the officer misapplied a state law designed to ban motorists from flashing after-market emergency lights.

Circuit Judge Alan Dickey earlier ruled that that state law does not apply to people who did what Kintner did, use his headlights to communicate.

On Tuesday the judge went a step further, saying people who flash their headlights to communicate are engaging in behavior protected by the U.S. Constitution.

Now, I expect this to go all the way to the Soprano Supreme Court, so this’ll be something to keep an eye on.

In the meantime, flash your headlights to yer heart’s content. 

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In all the hubbub surrounding the Trayvon Martin-George (Jorge?) Zimmerman brouhaha, there has been (to put it mildly) a lot of noise.

Reports, opinions, accusations, denials, threats – you name it, it’s out there.

I found the following (below the fold) on this thread here.  And before NJ.com scrubs it, I’m presenting it here for you.

The commenter seems to have done a most impressive job of investigating.

Aw, come on! Is that all you got?! >

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A couple of days after being told by a judge that no, pitching tents & fits just off City Hall isn’t  in the Constitution, the Occupussies in Dallas had their makeshift camp torn down.

Needless to say, they – and some of their supporters – aren’t too happy.

(ED. NOTE:  This is part of the Dullest Moaning Snooze’s “protected content”, meaning you have to pay money to see it online.  Sorry, I’m not paying hard-earned money for the DMN’s shit.  The link is where you’ll find the comment I’m about to fisk.)

{feralcat} The government has the ability, through use of police force, to disperse protestors. This doesn’t make it right. Fortunately, the police power of the city of Dallas still doesn’t trump the First Amendment and the movement against the corporate control of government will not be silenced, in Dallas or anywhere else in the nation.

Y’know, you lazy-assed leftard pussies, it occurs to this  writer that you should be on your knees thanking those who exercise “police force” for keeping your skank asses safe.

Consider this:  There are any number of right-thinking types, like yours truly, who would salivate at the chance to match up with you folks.

You have your little homemade maces, nails embedded in spikes; you have your rocks, sticks, bricks, concrete blocks and your “up twinkles” and shit.

My side has .45s, .357s (both sigs & Magnums), .50s, .380s, 12-gauges & 30.06s.

And really, the only things keeping us from using those tools to sweep you back into your mommies’ basements are the fact that:  1) it’s illegal, and 2) those same police about whom you’re kvetching are busy enforcing point 1).

(Note I haven’t said that the aforemetioned tools would actually, y’know, be fired – I tend to think that the sight of several dozen armed patriots advancing on you Occudoches would be enough to make you piss your pants, turn & high-tail it outta there.)

Somehow, I think your odds are somewhat less than scintillating.  Y’know?

Just sayin’, is all.

Anytime you Occutards grow a set.

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Denizens, welcome to this week’s edition of the Perfect Football Weekend™.

Arlington Heights gets its season ended by Birdville tonight, fifth-ranked Smurf Turf Douchebag State proves once again it can’t beat TCU without their so-called “trickeration” (they’ll win, but they’ll have to use trick plays to do so), sixth-ranked Oklahoma has the week off, so we’ll plug in 18th-ranked Wisconsin at UMinne-haha, 19th-ranked Nebraska is at 12th-ranked Penn State, and Dallas has Beefalo at home on Sunday.

And I’m not pontificating on the games this weekend, because I’ve got a Red Curtain o’ Blood™ covering my eyes RightAboutNow™, and a certain Filipina bitch – not to mention a lot of other Lame-Assed Media™ types – are at the top of my shit list.

Some background.  A damned good man lost his job today, and he lost it for the CARDINAL, UNFORGIVABLE SIN!!!!11!!!ONE!!1!ELEVENTYMILLION!!1!…of following Pennsylvania state law.

I refer, of course, to Joe Paterno.

Aw, come on! Is that all you got?! >

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