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In a piece of great news to start the Vicar’s cruise off on the right foot, a federal judge – who for once, wasn’t  acting in the role of a black-robed tyrant-wannabe – just took Bambicare and shoved it right back up Bambi’s ass:

The full text of the decision from Federal Judge Roger Vinson is not available yet, but according to reporters who’ve seen the decision, he’s ruled the entire Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act unconstitutional. The ruling favors of the 26 state attorney generals challenging the law. The judge ruled the individual mandate that requires all Americans to purchase health insurance invalid and, according to the decision, “because the individual mandate is unconstitutional and not severable, the entire Act must be declared void.”

And what makes it even more delicious is the way this Hemingway turd phrased it.  You could almost see & hear the tears flowing as he wrote it.

One down, two to go.  Gotta love it.

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Tomorrow is the Day!

Thirty one years ago, when I met the wonderful woman who became my wife, she wanted to go on a cruise. Tomorrow it will finally happen! As Internet access on board the ship is very expensive(around $0.50/minute), I will be out of pocket. Of course, I am not the major poster here, but just sayin! :)

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Denizens, remember The Receiver Formerly Known As Chad Johnson™?

Yeah, this guy.

Two years ago, Johnson gave himself the moniker — a reference in Spanish to his No. 85 — and put it on the back of his uniform before a game. Quarterback Carson Palmer ripped it off before the kickoff. After the season, coach Marvin Lewis — who dislikes Johnson’s attention-getting stunts — referred to the receiver as “Ocho Psycho.”

Well, guess what?  Now that the novelty’s worn off, now that people have finally started giving him the rolled-eyes treatment, now that he’s finally an average player on a piss-poor team…the light’s finally come on in that skull-still-full-o’-mush of his, common sense has finally taken hold…and he’s changing his name back.

Chad Johnson is making a comeback. Three years after changing his last name to Ochocinco, the man born Chad Javon Johnson will be going back to his given surname.

“I’ve done enough with Ochocinco,” the former Mr. Johnson told ESPN’s Trey Wingo. Yes, like having the least productive stretch of his career since the name change became official.

What with being a not-all-that-and-a-bag-o’-chips-type player ‘n all – in other words, being unable to walk his talk, he’s finally realized that he’d best snap out of it before he becomes a bigger joke than he already is.

Welcome back to the Real World™, Chad.  Some of us, of course, never did buy in to that “Ochocinco” bullshit – we’ve just been waiting for you to rejoin us, is all.

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Not that anyone’s counting or anything…but a cursory examination of the blog Yeah, Right, Whatever  (home of the SpatulaGoddess) will reveal that as of today, it’s been exactly one year since the last new post appeared on the site.

And not to put too  fine a point thereupon…but even then, the post was an auto-jobber from the Wednesday’s Hero crowd.  Fact is, my beloved SpatulaGoddess hasn’t posted anything of her own since June 23, 2009.

Sweetie, sabbaticals are one thing.  Losing yer muse…that’s one thing.  This ain’t that.

Don’t misunderstand me here…but isn’t it about time you officially hung it up?

With much love,

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Dennis Miller had the line of the night on O’Reilly tonight concerning the SOTU show:

“I didn’t watch it.  If I’d wanted to see a room full of big asses, I’d watch the Kardashian show.”

Ba.  Dum.  Chee

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I’ve been watching Michigan-Michigan State all evening long.

From 2004.

And frankly, I’m more entertained watching that than I would’ve been listening to Bambi.

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In case you missed it back on Monday, the Illinois Appeals Court ruled that Rahm Emanuel was ineligible to run for Chicago mayor because he did not meet the residency requirement.  Now since then, the Illinois Supreme Court has spoken that his name can stay on the ballot until they make a final ruling.

What makes this funny to us here at the Southern Command is that Rahm was replaced in his former Chief of Staff position by the one of the Chicago Daley clan, Bill.  With current mayor Dick Daley confirming that he was not going to run for a seventh term, Rahm figured he be a shoo-in…..especially if he got a Daley to take his place in the White House.  Ipso facto, Chicago politics in action.

If this latest development holds up (let’s pray it does), and the IL Supreme’s state that the Appeals court got it right you can bet there’s going to be an “emergency” that Rahm will make sure he doesn’t miss.  For now, we wait to see how the high court decides the matter.

StayTuned™

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I’m not 100% certain if His Nastiness and the General will agree, but it seems to me that this sort of lawsuit is long overdue. We all want to be secure when we travel, but there has got to be a way to ensure this security without destroying our rights and dignity.

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Eric Cantor (RINO-VA), the House Majority Leader, suggests (though not in so many words) that Michelle Bachmann doesn’t speak for the Republican Party.

Maybe that’s the problem.

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There are two ways to take this:

– Gibbs snuck a jab at the so-called birthers who don’t believe Obama was born in Hawaii. “I think rational people have — have long ago, many when they first heard and saw the president, come to the conclusion of his citizenship,” he said.

One can say, “Yes, Baghdad Bob – I do  consider myself “rational”…far more rational than you, in fact…and I’ve come to the conclusion that your honeyboy Bambi is hiding something.  So where is it, asswipe?”

Or I can take Baghdad Bobby’s meaning, and invite him to come say it to my face.

Anytime you grow a set larger than pinheads, Gibbsy.

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…I don’t have to put up with Moochelle’s Wookiee stench in two weeks.

Thank you, Green Bay.

Now if you can just handle Pathetics-burgh and the seven zebras they’re gonna bring with ‘em in two weeks…

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So back on Friday, the news that Keithy-weefy Olberman has jumped shark and severed his contract with the illustrious (P)MSNBC.  Just when things were going soooooo welll.  Not.

Even the Associated Piss found out that (P)MSNBC and Keithy-weefy weren’t BFFs.

Keith Olbermann’s exit from MSNBC appeared abrupt to viewers of his show, but the TV news commentator and his network were involved “in a relationship that’s been failing for a long time,” an NBC Universal executive said Saturday.

Sounds like the execs at the network were tired of cleaning up the trash Keithy-weefy caused from all of his barking moonbat excrement.

Olbermann was nearly fired in November but instead was suspended for two days without pay for violating an NBC News policy by donating to the political campaigns of three Democratic candidates, including the congressional campaign of Arizona Rep. Gabrielle Giffords. He returned and apologized to his fans, but not the network.

Gee, guess that kinda confirms that the execs decided they weren’t gonna play janitor no more.

I have a couple of theories on the the REAL reason Keithy-weefy is now finding himself in the unemployment line.

First, Keithy-weefy was SOOOOOOOOO sure he was getting the well-used leather chair over at the Communist News Network and fill the spot recently vacated by another old dude that when CNN announced that the spot was filled by Piers Morgan ol’ Keithy-weefy didn’t understand the irony that just bitchslapped him.

Second, and more probable IMHO, is that he knew The Onion was about to start up their news show this week and just could not bear the thought of giving them volumes of free material to work with that he had to get outta town before the last stagecoach departed. Yup, The Onion News Network is kicking off it’s cable show this Friday the 28th at 9pm ET on IFC.

Finally, all I gotta say is “BUH BYE Keithy-weefy.” That’s one less progressive screaming his mantra on the airwaves.

ThatIsAll™

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On this day, 38 years ago, seven men  decided what, exactly, women could do with their bodies.  (That’s for you feminazi bimboids who still bleat about how men shouldn’t have a say in any abortion that occurs anywhere, anytime.)  It was considered – and is still today, in some quarters – an “enlightened” decision that would “liberate” women.

Thirty-eight years later, this carnage in Pennsylvania is what our “enlightenment” has brought us.

An abortion doctor killed hundreds of babies by cutting their spinal cords with scissors after removing them from mothers late in their pregnancies, prosecutors said on Wednesday.

Philadelphia District Attorney Seth Williams charged Dr. Kermitt Gosnell, 69, and nine associates with eight counts of murder, following a year-long investigation by a grand jury, whose report was unveiled on Wednesday.

The defendants are charged with first-degree murder in the cases of seven babies for which there is substantial evidence, Williams said.

Hundreds of other babies are likely to have died in Gosnell’s West Philadelphia clinic, which he operated from 1979 to 2010, Williams said.

No doubt right now there are in this country some feminoid bitches and pussy-whipped (or maybe cock-whipped, who knows?) bastards who still – still – consider this Mengele-wannabe a fucking hero.

As the RCOB™ drapes over my eyes solid red, I have only two things to ask:

First, whaddya wanna bet that the Innocence Project tries to get him off at some point?

And, since Pennsylvania’s bleeding-heart court system will probably be wooed by a slick-talking John Edwards-type defense attorney into either letting him off light, or walking altogether – where’s Scott Roeder when you really need him?

ThatIsAll™.

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ITEM:  T-sip U. the other day inked a 20-year, $300 extra-large (that’s million  to those of you in the Church of the SubTarded) contract with the four-lettered Mickey Mouse outfit (that’d be “ESPN” to the aforementioned SubTarded) to broadcast TU athletic events.

UT President William Powers Jr. said the agreement, which also involves IMG College, a company that handles marketing and licensing for the university, will create 50 to 100 network jobs based at Royal-Memorial Stadium, fund some academic initiatives and further cement the university’s sports brand, already one of the most lucrative in the nation.

”We see this as a very important part of sort of continuing to reinvent the models through which we do business,” Powers said. “This is reflective of being much more creative in how public higher education positions itself as we go forward, even aside from the athletics.”

LORD VENOMOUS’ REACTION:  Well, they have to meet the player payroll somehow.

(NOTE:  The above is my First Amendment-protected opinion.  TU attorneys – you can turn it sideways and go fuck yourselves with it.)

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ITEM:  Guy by the name of James Eric Fuller – at least, we think  that’s his name; there appears to be evidence out there to the contrary – was one of the shooting victims last week in Tucson.

Apparently, the little jackwagon blames the Tea Party.

In its story on the arrest, The New York Times said Fuller reported last week that he had trouble sleeping after he was wounded. The paper said that in an interview last week, Fuller repeatedly denounced the “Tea Party crime syndicate,” and said he placed some of the blame for the shooting on Sarah Palin and other Republican leaders, saying he believed they had contributed to a toxic atmosphere.

Oh, yeah – the arrest.  Seems he wanted to take his frustrations out on the Tea Party physically.

In an unexpected twist to the Arizona shootings, a man wounded in the attack was arrested and taken for a psychiatric exam after an outburst at a town hall meeting, during which he took a picture of a tea party leader and yelled, “You’re dead,” authorities say.

James Eric Fuller, 63, was detained on misdemeanor disorderly conduct and threat charges Saturday during the event taped for a special edition of ABC’s “This Week,” Pima County sheriff’s spokesman Jason Ogan said.

The Tea Partier was apparently suggesting that we not go all knee-jerk on proposing new gun-control laws.  (Or, as the Demoscum would call it, “standard operating procedure”.)

For his trouble, Fuller got the white jacket.

Ogan said deputies decided he needed a mental health evaluation, and he was taken to a hospital, which will determine when he will be released.

My question is…why?  He was only being a typical Demoscum, after all.

Then again, what’s Savage always said?  About how liberalism being a mental disorder ‘n all…? 

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