Welcome to the Realm™ - Version 5.0...

The General – along with the rest of you anti-Microsoft bigots (grin) – will be pleased to learn that Yours Truly&#153 has started down the path of one particular Dark Side&#153.

For this post…is being written on a Linux box.

More later.&#160 Gotta go pick up Mrs. Venomous’ car and cough up $500 to turn off a “check engine” light.&#160


This is only a test. Had this been a real post, I might have made sense! 🙂


…Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone.  Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone.

The red zone is for loading and unloading of passengers only.  All unoccupied vehicles will be towed.

…Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone.  Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone.

No, the WHITE courtesy phone.


Denizens, it’s come to my attention that certain instances of IE were not displaying This Fine Blog&#153 correctly – IOW, the posts were appearing below the right sidebar, f’rinstance.

Your assignment (and this goes for all you non-libtard visitors, as well – register on the site if you need to) is as follows:&#160 Tell me how it looks on your browser (and (duh) lemme know what you’re using).&#160 Does everything look in place – IOW, are the posts in the middle under the banner; do the sidebars look okay; is the “Local Time Where You’re At” caption underneath the clock, instead of to the side, etc?

Lemme know.&#160 And thanks.


Denizens, I need some help here, and you’re the only ones who can do this.

(If you’ve never registered here, and you’re passing by, or just bored or whatever, feel free to register and offer your views, too.)

Take a look at that Rolex© watch face over there on the right sidebar.

Question:&#160 Do you see a white background surrounding the watch?

Here’s the deal:&#160 I saw the watch in a white square the other day while on another machine running Internet Exploder.

However, I can’t reproduce the effect on my machine, but I don’t trust my weird-assed color scheme.&#160 This is where you come in.

If you’ll do me the honor of telling me what you’re seeing, I’d be most grateful.

Thanks in advance.&#160 (And thanks for reading this blog, too, while I’m thinking about it.)

UPDATE:&#160 Actually, I think I like this clock with the starfield background better.

Still, if you see anything there but the black page b/g, lemme know if you would.


Denizens, obviously (that is, if you’re paying attention it’s obvious) I’m testing out some new features to put on This Fine Blog&#153.&#160 Your patience is most appreciated.

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 As if they had any choice.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Hush, you.

K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 (smirk)

Not sure if we’re gonna keep any of these, or if they’ll even work if/when we decide to upgrade the WordPress version.

RAYEGUN:&#160 You’re actually gonna do that?

VENOMOUS:&#160 When I’m damned good ‘n ready, awright?!

RAYEGUN:&#160 It was just a question, geeze.

MERLIN:&#160 Little touchy this morning, are we?

MRS. VENOMOUS:&#160 He’s still p.o.’d about the Cowgirls.

MERLIN:&#160 Ah.

MRS. VENOMOUS:&#160 Hey, be glad you’re just on staff.&#160 I&#160 have to live with him 24/7.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Our condolences, ma’am.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Would you all PUT A CORK IN IT?!?!?!

This is what happens when I hire non-union help.



Anyway, keep yer eyes peeled for more of this stuff.&#160 ThatIsAll&#153.


Denizens, if the blog starts acting a little weird…

MERLIN:&#160 Yeah?&#160 And when doesn’t&#160 it?

VENOMOUS:&#160 Hush, you.

…don’t panic.&#160 I’m testing some stuff over here.



Yes, that’s right – I’m testing something.

Yeah, that’s pretty much all I got for now.

UPDATE:&#160 General, check in, if you please.&#160 I haven’t figured out how to add this to the editor yet, so it’ll have to be executed manually for now, and you’ll want to know the code.


This is a test.


[Scene:&#160 the engineering section of Pegasus.&#160 Lieutenant Commander Ozymandias McCool has rivers of sweat pouring from his brow after four days of hard work.&#160 He steps back, makes one last check for loose connections, wipes his brow and heads for the intercom.]

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Engineering to Bridge!

KORRIOTH (over speaker):&#160 Bridge.&#160 Korrioth here.

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Captain, please inform the Admiral that the new shields are ready to deploy.

[Cut to the bridge of Pegasus.&#160 Exec Officer Korrioth and His Rudeness listen to McCool’s report with satisfied looks on their faces.]

LSIK&T:&#160 Acknowledged, Commander, and thank you.&#160 Bridge out.&#160 (to Korrioth) Captain, if you please…?

KORRIOTH:&#160 Tactical!&#160 Raise shields!

Denizens, I’m trying some things behind the scenes here.&#160 If all goes well, you won’t notice a thing.


Denizens, if the page starts looking kinda funky, bear with me.&#160 I’m working on something.

I’ll let you know what it is if I’m successful with it.

If not, that sound you hear will be McCool getting shoved out the airlock.

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Eep.

UPDATE:&#160 Okay, those of you perusing my fine work (cough) via InterTubes Exploder are seeing something I lifted off of this site here (and please, try not to ogle Carmen Electra too much, mkay?).&#160 Obviously, it’s a clock that chases your mouse pointer.

I don’t know if Ciampis did this himself, or lifted it from someone else, but I think it’s damn cool.

Firefox users (me included), be patient. You can’t see it yet, and I’m trying to find out why.


Denizens, this is a test.&#160 Feel free to ignore.


(SCENE:&#160 Aboard Pegasus.&#160&#160 Sparks are flying from Ozymandias McCool’s communications panel.)

LSIK&T:&#160 Dammit, Ozy, that’s the third one today!!!&#160 I told&#160 you not to put your Romulan Ale on top of that board!!!

OZY:&#160 Wasn’t the ale this&#160 time, m’Lord!&#160 I’ve got it on the deck here by my foot in this sealed mug! (inadvertently knocks it over.&#160 Fortunately, it really was&#160 sealed, so nothing spills out.)&#160 See?

LSIK&T:&#160 Okay, fine, whatever. (to speaker) Engineering!!!

MERLIN:&#160 Aye, m’Lord?

LSIK&T:&#160 Get another communications panel up here on the double.&#160 This time, set the voltage for 240 instead of 110 like I asked you the first time?!?!?!?!

MERLIN: (wincing)&#160 Aye, sir.

LSIK&T:&#160 Ozy, hurry up and finish your apprenticeship under him, willya?&#160 I’d prefer you take over for him before&#160 he blows this ship up…??? (sigh)

(Ozy tries to suppress a grin as we fade to black)

Okay, Denizens, comments are fixed.&#160 (If you didn’t notice that they were broken, never mind.)



(SCENE:&#160 Aboard the Klingon Bird-of-Prey Pegasus.&#160&#160 The ship has just exited its sixth wormhole of the past 90 minutes after yet another failed attempt to go to warp…and none too smoothly, either.&#160 Chief Engineer & Magician Merlin picks himself up off the deck again.)

MERLIN:&#160 Dammit, I’m gonna catch Hell&#153 for that&#160 jolt…

(as if on cue) LSIK&T(on speakers):&#160 Merlin, would you mind coming up to the bridge, please, sir?

(Merlin warily eyes the rest of the engineering crew warily.&#160 Lord Spatula’s tone-of-voice sounded way&#160 too cordial for his comfort.)

MERLIN:&#160 Uhhh…aye, sir? (trudges toward the bridge)

(SCENE:&#160 On the bridge of Pegasus.&#160&#160 The doors part and Merlin comes to stand to the right of Lord Spatula’s command chair.&#160 Tactical officer Korrioth, the Klingon-Vulcan hybrid, stands behind Spats’ right shoulder, directly to Merlin’s left.)

MERLIN:&#160 Reporting as ordered, m’Lord…?

LSIK&T:&#160 (pleasantly) Mr. Korrioth…?


(Korrioth delivers a wicked backhand to the side of Merlin’s head.&#160 Merlin literally flies across the bridge, coming to rest in a crumpled heap in the forward section thereof.&#160 Lord Spatula comes to stand over him.)

LSIK&T:&#160 I trust I’ve made my point, Wizard…?

MERLIN:&#160 (groggily) Aye, m’Lord.&#160 I’ll…get it right…unnnh…this time…ow…

LSIK&T:&#160 Mr. Korrioth, will you please carry Merlin back to Engineering, place him gently in his chair and double-check whatever calculations he comes up with?

KORRIOTH:&#160 (grunt)

LSIK&T:&#160 Thank you, gentlemen.

(SCENE:&#160 Six hours later.)

KORRIOTH:&#160 Bridge, this is Korrioth.&#160 Try it now, m’Lord.

LSIK&T:&#160 There’s a Cluebat&#153 with your name on it if it’s wrong, Korrioth…!!!

KORRIOTH:&#160 All simulations test positive, m’Lord.&#160 We have the proper formula balance now.&#160 We may proceed at warp nine, if you wish.

LSIK&T:&#160 I’ll hold you to that, targ-breath.&#160 (to the helm) Mr. K’hadibak’h, if you please?&#160 Warp…(glances back behind him, as if towards Engineering)…one.

(Pegasus&#160 shoots into warp one more time…)

Okay, guys, I’ve tweaked the formatting of the blogroll and the email advisory to my liking; now I think we’re ready to go (he said as he tapped a neutronium ClueBat&#153 in his hand).&#160 Now that the main page looks the way I want it to look, I can start installing some scripts.

Bear with me and keep your fingers crossed… (sigh)


Guys, the page is about to start looking very&#160 funky.

Bear with me and things will hopefully start looking much better after I’m done.


UPDATE:&#160 Okay, Denizens – time to check in, all of you.

Don’t ask me how, but I think&#160 I have it.&#160 I’m seeing the header/banner at the top where it should be; the posts in the body on the left side where they should be; the links, archive calendar, search box, email blurb, Digital Brownshirt, Madfishy’s COTBG pic and&#160 my beautiful baby boy – all where they should be (the “Archives” and that crap below it I don’t immediately care about)…

and&#160 the footer info, all where it&#160 should be.&#160 And&#160 I see it not only in Firefox, but in IE, as well, which has me pretty damned geeked at the moment.

(It should.&#160 It took long enough. (sigh))

Your assignment:&#160 Look at this blog.&#160 Is what I just described what you see also?&#160 Denizens, I need you to check in and tell me how it looks to you, if you’d be so kind (and yes – put a cork in it when it comes to the color scheme.&#160 I like it, okay? (grin))

Thank you very kindly.&#160 Now&#160 thatisall.&#160


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This blog is best viewed with your eyes. 
It helps, though, if you have Microsoft Internet Explorer  set about 1024x768 1280x1024 with your Favorites window activated on the left deactivated.  (At least until I can get a better handle on how WordPress works.)

(KORRIOTH:  Oh, great.  More wormholes.)

Mozilla Firefox doesn't do too badly, either; in fact, it's His Rudeness' browser of choice.
You can  use Nutscrape,  if you so desire - but why in blazes would you want to use a browser from a company that had to hide behind Janet El Reño's skirt to be successful?

And don't even  get me started on Opera or Chrome.  I'm not about  to trust any browser that won't let me change its color scheme.
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