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My faith in Wal-Mart may have been restored a little bit.

Went there yesterday to purchase a couple of items on which to munch for lunch.&#160 (Yeah, I know – but they were the only store around where I happened to be.)&#160 Came to the 20-items-or-less checkout to pay.

In front of me:&#160 a young black woman with a scowl on her face…and the bimbo in front of her, who had 40&#160 items in her basket if she had one.

(I hesitate to point out here that the bimbo looked very much like an illegal.&#160 Would not have surprised me had that been the case…but I digress.)

Apparently the young black woman had complained to management about the situation.&#160 “For all the good that’s&#160 gonna do her”, I thought…

…until another cashier relieved she who had&#160 been going to allow the 40+ items, and politely informed the illegal bimbo that she needed to find another line.

(Insert stares of wide-eyed disbelief here.&#160 &#160 )

First store I’ve ever been to in my life that actually cared enough about its other&#160 customers to enforce an item limit in the express line.

Thanks, Wal-Mart.&#160 Maybe you’re not all a bunch of morons, after all.

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Happy Memorial Day, Denizens.

The annual posting of the Memorial Day column can be found here.

It remains a very good read, even today.&#160 Hie thee hence.&#160 Go.&#160 Shoo.

And remember why we have this day today.

Thatisall&#153.

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Memo to The Six Or Seven Of You Who Still Read This Blog&#153:

I’ve been trying to stay ahead of a medical condition that’s plagued me for the last ten-plus years or so.&#160 (Those of you who know me well know what I’m talking about.)

Anyway, the bastich has caught up and smacked me upside the head again, necessitating a probable, slight change in routine.

Bottom line:&#160 Posting will be even more erratic than it is now.&#160 We’ll have the annual Memorial Day post tomorrow, then posting will be on an as-I-can-get-to-it basis. (IOW, standard operating procedure, only moreso.)

Will have more on the medical condition soon as I have it under control.&#160 Watch this space.

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You guys remember those items I mentioned regarding curiouser and curiouser???

Go have a look at Misha’s take thereupon.

Good reading.&#160 Very highly recommended.

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Denizens, it’s difficult tonight to know where, or how, to start expressing the outrage.

The Imperial RINO Senate told the American people to go fuck themselves today.

If Limpdickya signs their piece-of-shit bill (that is, assuming it makes it out of committee), 20 million illegal alien fucktards will walk.&#160 And so will the fucking bastards who employ them.&#160 Bastards whom you should be boycotting even now.&#160 Tyson Foods and Cargill Meats, for starters – and I can probably dig up a few more if you ask.

The GOP has given away the Senate for a very long time to come.&#160 The House may not be far behind, especially if they crack:

Representative John A. Boehner of Ohio, the House majority leader, said today that he was hopeful that the Senate and House could reach a compromise. But when asked what form that compromise would take, he acknowledged he did not know.

Here’s your “compromise”, Boehner, you goat-felching tosser:&#160 You go along with the Senate on this, you lose your jobs.&#160 How’s that for a “compromise”?

And the White House is all but assured to go back to the Demoscum in ’08, unless we get a Tancredo-style or George Allen-style conservative as the candidate.&#160 Certainly McCluetard (RINO-AZ) has all but killed his chances two years hence.&#160 And for you Bush-loving imbeciles…don’t even think&#160 of Jeb getting into the White House.&#160 To paraphrase Pappy, “Nope…ain’t gonna happen…nope…”

Congratulations, Grand Ol’ Pissants.&#160 It’s not many political parties that can go from having their collective foot on their opponents’ collective throat to being completely swept out of power in a four year span.&#160 But you shit-for-brains Rockefeller Republicans are about to pull it off cleanly.

Fuck ’em all,&#160 the end.

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Item:&#160 William “Bribes, Lies & Videotape” Jefferson’s Capitol Hill office gets searched over the weekend by the boys at the FBI.

Item:&#160 In a surprise move, Denny Hastert (RINO-Ill Noise) joins San Fran Nan “Breck Girl” Pelosi in demanding the return of the materials the FBI confiscated.

Item:&#160 Federal officials indicate that Hastert is now part of the investigation, even though DOJ says he’s not.

Curiouser and curiouser…

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&#160

Jessie “I’m not an Army Ranger, but I play one on Peace Videos” MacBeth and Michael “Forsake The Troops (ekthept for that one, he’th cute)” Crook.

Don’t they just look like the cutest couple?

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The Dullest Moaning Snooze reports that Lloyd Bentsen died today at the age of 85.

My mamma taught me that if you can’t say anything nice about a left-wing, pork-barrel-tax-and-spend, pro-abort, cheap-shot-artist son-of-a-bitch…then don’t say anything.

So I’ll just say that Lloyd Bentsen died today, and leave it at that.

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(Hat tip Michelle Malkin via Misha.)

Among those who will be cleared of past crimes under the Senate’s proposed immigration-reform bill would be the businesses that have employed the estimated 10 million illegal aliens eligible for citizenship and that provided the very “magnet” that drew them here in the first place.

Buried in the more than 600 pages of legislation is a section titled “Employer Protections,” which states: “Employers of aliens applying for adjustment of status under this section shall not be subject to civil and criminal tax liability relating directly to the employment of such alien.”

Supporters of the legislation insist that such provisions do not amount to “amnesty”.

Oh, no, don’t call it “amnesty”.&#160 Under no circumstances whatsoever call it “amnesty”.&#160 Even when it fits the dictionary definition of “amnesty” – by no means call it “amnesty”.

More »

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Mheh.&#160 Someone up in southern Kentucky must be reading me. (No, I don’t really&#160 think so, but it’s fun to imagine they do.)

If you’ll recall, an ACLU-dick sucking, black-robed, tinhorned excuse-for-a-judge had forbidden a member of the senior class of Russell County “Hah Skrewl” (a little Rush lingo, there) to pray.&#160 And, if you’ll recall, I advised those seniors to ignore the pointy-headed bench-jockey.

And lo & behold – they did.&#160 Boy, did they ever:

More »

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Look out, Blogosphere.&#160 My influence is spreading…mhehhehhehheh…

Politics and Religion&#160 makes its grand debut in our little realm…and, speaking of the Realm&#153 – yes, he is my blog-son.

Keep an eye on his blog.&#160 It’s gonna be a good’un.

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Another year, another graduation ceremony…another black-robed tinhorned son-of-a-crack-whore-bitch pseudo-tyrant with delusions of mere sexual inadequacy thinking he can tell free Americans when they can pray and not pray:

A federal judge on Friday blocked a southern Kentucky high school from including prayers in its graduation ceremony Friday evening.

The American Civil Liberties Union filed a federal lawsuit this week seeking a restraining order on behalf of an unidentified student at Russell County High School in Russell Springs, 90 miles south of Louisville.

Memo to those Kentucky kids:&#160 Ignore it.&#160 Those shitheels at the Allah-humping Caliphate Lickspittle’s Union can’t enforce this, no matter how many stormtroopers they send up there.

The student had appealed to principal Darren Gossage to drop the prayer from the Friday evening ceremony, but the principal refused, ACLU attorney Lili Lutgens said.

Hmmmmm.&#160 Might be because the school official, as an extension of government, has to stay neutral in such matters, y’think?

Of course, the Asshatted Crackheads Leprosy Union is well known for its hatred of all things religious.&#160 Unless that religion is the one featuring the Pedophile Prophet (bees pee upon him), of course.

Lutgens argued that any prayer would be unconstitutional because it would endorse a specific religion and religious views. U.S. District Judge Joseph McKinley granted the temporary restraining order Friday morning, prohibiting the school district from having even a student representative say a prayer during the ceremony.

And if there were any justice in the world, he’d find the view from the lamppost most enligtening the next day.

Just sayin’, is all.

The U.S. Supreme Court has held that clergy-led prayer in public school graduations and sporting events is prohibited. Lutgens said earlier this week that student-initiated prayer before or after the ceremony would be OK.

“Heavenly Father, as we’re about to make this sacrifice of the traitorous skank, we ask that You ignore the stench coming from her piehole.

We tried to plug it, but little Lili was just a bit too flatulent, y’know?”

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Okay, let’s see…how to start this…

“Once upon a time…”

MERLIN:&#160 Oh, you can not&#160 be serious.

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Ew.&#160 Just, ew.

LSIK&T:&#160 Oh, all right. (rolls eyes)

“It was a dark & stormy night…”

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Uh, helloooooooooooo???&#160 You traveled in the daytime, remember???

MERLIN:&#160 Great Honkin’ Cthulu&#153, man, if you’re gonna start a story with a clich&#233, at least make it a good one, huh?

LSIK&T:&#160 Day-um, you’re a tough crowd.&#160 Sheesh.

“Juuuuuust sit right back and you’ll hear a tale…a tale of a fateful trip…”

LSIK&T:&#160 There.&#160 Happy now?

MERLIN:&#160 Well, it’s still cheesy…

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 …but it’ll do.

MERLIN:&#160 Ozy!!!

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Fine.&#160 He can shove you&#160 out the airlock this time.

MERLIN:&#160 Eep!

LSIK&T:&#160 Thank&#160 you.

So here I was, about to leave the domecile and head out on this fantastical odyssey that is the Blown-eyed Blodgers Great Texas Invasion of 2006&#153.&#160 It’s about 8:00 in the morning, my traveling companions Deathknyte and Krondax…

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Hey, how come we&#160 didn’t get to go?

MERLIN:&#160 Yeah, what’re we, chopped liver?

LSIK&T:&#160 You weren’t invited; you don’t write blogs.&#160 Now hush.

…are due in about an hour or so, and I’ve barely enough time to run put my paycheck in the bank, scoot over to Whataburger for a quick breakfast-on-the-go, get the rental car and get to the terminal to pick them up.&#160 It’s now 8:00

8:01:&#160 Enter the Dallas North Tollway.&#160 See the absolutely massive&#160 backup southbound.&#160 Get caught in it.&#160 So much for the bank (fortunately, I still have some chump change left from cashing in my Cingular 401k, so I don’t absolutely have&#160 to make the deposit…

MERLIN:&#160 …while he continues to pay us&#160 minimum wage…

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 …and continues to renege on his promise of giving us a raise…

LSIK&T:&#160 (pulls out Klingon disruptor, sets spread formation, and nails both Merlin & Ozy, who crumple in a heap) There.&#160 That’s&#160 better.&#160 Now, where was I…?

…but now I’m running out of time and need to scoot.

More »

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(Hat tip – and many thanks – to the SpatulaGoddess.)

Damn, I’d give anything if I could be in Altoona, PA on July 2nd.

“Why’s that, Spats?”, you may ask.&#160 “I mean, you’re not a fan of the Great Game&#153, so what gives?”

Well, it might have something to do with the fact that I love laughing at morons, and the Altoona Curve’s special promotion that night would give me nine innings worth of doing just that.

Inspired by a Los Angeles Angels fan who filed a lawsuit against the club because he did not receive a red nylon tote bag as part of the major league club’s Mother’s Day promotion last May, the Altoona Curve have announced that they will be holding Salute to Frivolous Lawsuit Night as part of their Sunday, July 2nd game at Blair County Ballpark.

The Curve’s salute to all ridiculous lawsuits ever filed will include the following:

# A Pink Tote Bag Giveaway to the first 137 men in attendance ages 18 and over
# The first 137 women 18 and over will receive lukewarm coffee so they will not burn themselves
# The first 137 kids will be given a beach ball with a warning not to ingest it
# Angels merchandise and novelty items given away throughout the game
# Honoring some of history’s “Most Frivolous Lawsuits” during the game

A grand prize drawing in which one fan will receive a “clue” and their own frivolous lawsuit.

Additional details will be announced later

“We realize that these giveaways as part of our Salute to Frivolous Lawsuit Night are fairly stupid and serve no real purpose,” said Curve General Manager Todd Parnell. “But if our fans don’t like them, then they can sue us!”

Curve President and Managing Partner Chuck Greenberg, himself a practicing corporate and sports attorney, declined to comment on his club’s promotion because of concerns that his comments could lead to a frivolous lawsuit.

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Supposedly, National Review&#160 is the conservative’s magazine of record.

I’ve read it – even had a subcription to Buckley’s rag at one time – and I can’t say I’m terribly impressed.&#160 True, it does possess a certain right-of-center lean to it – but it’s more of a “country-club” style of conservatism. (Such individuals were commonly known as “Rockefeller Republicans” in extreme dishonor of ol’ John D.)

We’ve been lamenting here lately about how the ever-increasing problem concerning our beloved&#160 government (*cough*) has come to a tipping point, thanks to the way that the RRs in power have completely bungled critical issues like illegal immigration, and the RRs over at National Review Online are stomping on the panic button at the prospect that conservatives might just stay home in droves come November.

One such Shrubya Kool-Aid drinker is a guy by the name of Jim Geraghty.&#160 Jim-bo – like his fellow RRs, fearful that their favorite toy (the Republican majority) is about to be taken away from them – start in with the whining:

More »

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