Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 8:59
At this moment, I’m as ashamed to be an American as I’ve ever been.
Terri Schiavo has just died.  The United States of America has just finished failing her.  We have failed Terri.
This will be the only post today.  The next post will require the strongest asbestos underwear to read, and I will not care whether or not it offends you.
That is all.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 6:48
Quick, hide the Pontiff from Mikey Shitstain and Georgie-Porgy Dolphin-Humper™!!!
Pope John Paul II is getting nutrition from a feeding tube through the nose, the Vatican said on Wednesday, shortly after the frail pontiff appeared at his window in St. Peter’s Square and unsuccessfully tried to speak.
Vatican spokesman Joaquin Navarro-Valls said the tube was aimed at improving the pope’s calorie intake. It was not visible when the pope made his appearance.
Hey, if it’s good enough for Pope John Paul II, Fellatios the Pro-Death Pussy™, why isn’t it good enough for Terri, you son-of-a-crack-whore-bitch?
Three ropes, three lampposts, the Unholy Trinity™.  Some assembly required.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 21:36
Johnnie Cochran, OJ Simpson’s criminal attorney, died today at his home in Los Angeles.  He was 67.
There’s nothing I feel like saying about him that won’t sound incredibly snarky, so I’ll just leave it at that.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 20:25
And now…a non-Terri post.  (Hold the applause.)
The Realm™ extends prayers and get-well wishes to Jerry Falwell, who has apparently had a relapse of the viral pneumonia that sidelined him a few weeks back.
You can’t go yet, sir.  You still have too much to do here.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 17:15
I’m not sure quite what to make of this.
On the one hand, I’m encouraged that Mikey Shitstain is going to “allow” this autopsy – especially since it appears that he’d have had to anyway.
(Floridian legal beagles, front and center:  I’ve heard that cremation candidates must  have an autopsy done prior thereto.  Is this the case?)
UPDATE:  Hat tip to Denizen David Hartung:  According to WND, Florida law does  require such an autopsy.
How magnanimous of Mssrs. Shitstain and his fucknozzle-excuse-for-an-attorney to graciously  accede to this.
On the other hand…any autopsy would be done at the Pinellas County morgue.  It would not be a stretch to say that if any high muckety-much in Pinellas County told me that the sky was blue, I’d go out to double-check.  It is not outside the realm of possibility that Mikey Shitstain and Georgie-Porgie
Fellatio Felon Felos are even now attempting to intimidate the coroner there.
I guess we’ll see how far this conspiracy extends, won’t we?
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 8:55
I generally agree with most of the stuff Joseph Farah of WorldNetDaily has to say.  Oh, there’ll be the occasional disagreement, but usually Farah has a good take on things.
And then, every once in a while, he gets the nail flush-bang-on-foursquare on the head.  His column for today is just such an occasion.
Go read it – and keep your head on a swivel; that’s how much you’ll be nodding in agreement.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 13:19
Terri received over $1M in a medical malpractice suit back in 1992, according to this story in WorldNetDaily.  The money was supposed  to be used for her long-term care and rehab.
Not a dime of it has been used for that purpose – and now, we learn the remaining balance of the judgement is in the neighborhood of around $50K.
“So where’d all this money go, Spats?”, I hear you asking.
When a jury awarded Terri Schiavo more than $1 million in a medical malpractice suit against her two physicians in 1992, it did so believing the money would be used to pay for the brain-injured woman’s long-term care and rehabilitation.
But instead of the therapy he promised he’d provide for Terri, her estranged husband, Michael Schiavo, 41, who is also her legal guardian, used most of the money to pay attorneys to arrange his wife’s death; and he did this with full court approval.
The money awarded Terri was placed in a trust fund, and a judge approved all expenditures from pedicures to attorney bills. The latter has skyrocketed over the years, as Terri’s parents, Robert and Mary Schindler, battled their son-in-law in the Florida courts over their daughter’s right to live.
In April 1993, Terri’s money was valued at $776,254. According to a financial planner, it’s been estimated that if the principle had not been touched, the fund during the mid- to late 1990s would have grown and at the same time generated an annual income of at least $70,000. This easily would have paid for her care in the finest nursing home in Florida, including rehabilitation.
However, under Florida law, if Terri should die, Schiavo as spouse and guardian stood to inherit her entire trust fund.
No sooner was Terri’s money in the bank than Michael Schiavo refused to begin the long-awaited rehabilitation program. He directed the nursing home where she lived not to give her antibiotics for various infections and had a “do not resuscitate” order attached to her chart. He later testified doctors had advised him that her condition was hopeless and if she became ill he should “let her die.”
So, instead of spending all that money trying to assist Terri’s recovery…Mikey Shitstain used it to kill her.
Oh, yeah.  That’s  being a “doting husband”, all right.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 8:53
And in keeping with the countenance of a man desperate to keep people from finding out about the heinous crime he’s committed, Mikey Shitstain is now trying to destroy the last remaining evidence linking him to the impending murder of his wife – that being the body.
He wants her cremated, you see.
Michael Schiavo decided to have his wife’s body cremated after her parents’ lawyers obtained medical records showing she had sustained broken bones, a nurse who cared for Terri Schiavo is now claiming.
“He wanted her cremated after the bone fractures and dislocations were found,” nurse Carla Sauer Iyer, who cared for Terri in the mid-1990s while she was at the Palm Gardens Convalescent Center, told ABC Radio host Sean Hannity on Friday.
“He immediately went to court and [said he] wanted her body cremated at that time,” she said, “after we got hold of the records that proved there were dislocations and fractures.”
Yeah, that really sounds like someone who “did everything he could vis à vis rehabilitation, medical care, etc., until it became hopeless.”
Sounds more like someone who keeps ranting about when is that bitch gonna die” to me.
And the conspiracy continues to grow:
Nurse Iyer said she recently contacted Palm Gardens to encourage co-workers who also cared for Terri to speak out – but said they have been muzzled.
“The administrator had gotten them together and they talked about what happened with Michael,” Iyer told Hannity. “The people who have worked with Terri who are still there, they cannot talk to reporters – they would be terminated.”
If I’m Bob & Mary Schindler, I’m having the best lawyers in the country prepare the largest-ever civil lawsuit.  And it’s gonna target not only Mikey Shitstain, but the twin Georgie-Porgy pisspots, Greer and
Fellatios Felon Felos, plus  the state of Florida and the nursing homes who keep threatening these nurses with their jobs.
And several people/companies wind up owing me several hundred million dollars before it’s all done.  Hey, guys, you’ve heard of the concept of “wrongful death”, right?
I just hope Bob & Mary have the wherewithal left to take these motherfuckers to the cleaners.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 23:30
(Ed. note:  This post will stay up on top all day, unless Terri dies.  Look below for other new stuff.)
Now after the Sabbath, as the first day of the week began to dawn, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary came to see the tomb.  And behold, there was a great earthquake; for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven, and came and rolled back the stone from the door, and sat on it.
His countenance was like lightning, and his clothing as white as snow.  And the guards shook for fear of him, and became like dead men.
But the angel answered and said to the women, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified.  He is not here; for He is risen, as He said.  Come, see the place where the Lord lay.  And go quickly and tell His disciples that He is risen from the dead, and indeed He is going before you into Galilee; there you will see Him. Behold, I have told you.”  So they went out quickly from the tomb with fear and great joy, and ran to bring His disciples word.
And as they went to tell His disciples, behold, Jesus met them, saying, “Rejoice!”  So they came and held Him by the feet and worshiped Him.  Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid. Go and tell My brethren to go to Galilee, and there they will see Me.”
And may God add His blessings to the reading of His Word.
Denizens, today – March 27, 2005 – is Easter Sunday.  Remember why  we celebrate this day.
It isn’t about bunnies or colored eggs or candy, and it never has been.
He is risen.  Rejoice!!!
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 8:34
Acidprick says that better blogs than mine have de-linked him.
Whatever.  I’ll be the first to admit – Instapundit I ain’t.
But by the same token, I’m linking better blogs than Gut Rumbles.
This guy’s good.  Damned good.  You need to make him a daily read.  I know I’m  going to.
UPDATE:  American Expat in Southeast Asia is also a very good read.  It is my pleasure to add them to my blogroll.
Check ’em both out.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 8:00
We find Our Hero (me) in Wonderland this morning, as down seems to be up and up, down.
Reason:  I find myself agreeing with a liberal Democrat and  wanting to rip the balls off a son-of-a-bitch who is supposedly  a Christian-conservative Republican.
The liberal is Lanny Davis, who is appalled at the brutal way in which Terri is being murdered.
“In this situation on a personal and moral level, I go with the parents who are willing to take care of this young woman,” former White House Counsel Lanny Davis told Fox News Channel’s Geraldo Rivera. “And I cannot comprehend why this husband is standing in their way.”
“I see no reason why the rule of law, or in this case, [why] there shouldn’t be an exception to that rule,” Davis said, adding that Michael “can’t convince me that he’s certain of this tragic woman’s wishes.”
“I have no comprehension as to where he gets his anger from. He’s even denied a their request for a final Communion,” he complained.
Lanny, it completely befuddles me, too, especially given this information, also uncovered by NewsMax.
Greer – a conservative Christian and longtime Republican known for an easy manner – has become the public face of the judiciary in this internationally watched fight. But despite the mounting pressure, he has been steadfast in his rulings that Terri Schiavo is in a persistent vegetative state and did not want to be kept alive artificially.
Yet another memo to the Republican Party:  Gentlemen, I’m not sure if judges at his level are appointed or elected down there.  But if they’re elected, and you give him so much as one penny  for a re-election campaign, then I’ve voted for my last Republican, so help me God.
And I don’t give a flying fuck who  the Republican might be.  If the GOP supports this Flamingo-Felching Fascist Fucknozzle™, then the GOP can go to Hell™, AFAIC.
As for the Dolphin-Humper’s so-called “Christianity”?  I’m fond of pointing out that I’m probably one of the worst examples of a Christian since the apostle Paul labelled himself thus in one or another of the Epistles.  But I think I may have found someone worse.
I just hope he doesn’t claim to be a Southern Baptist.  I think that’d just about tie it for me.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 12:54
Sean Gleeson at Diary of an Oklahoma Artist reports that Jeb Bush may have grown a spine, after all.
According to this story from Knight-Ridder (not all that credible a source – yes, I know, but still…), Jeb had a team of state police on their way to pick Terri up.
Hours after a judge ordered that Terri Schiavo wasn’t to be removed from her hospice, a team of Florida law enforcement agents were en route to seize her and have her feeding tube reinserted – but they stopped short when local police told them they would enforce the judge’s order, The Miami Herald has learned.
Agents of the Florida Department of Law Enforcement told police in Pinellas Park, the small town where Schiavo lies at Hospice Woodside, that they were on the way to take her to a hospital to resume her feeding.
For a brief period, local police, who have officers around the hospice to keep protesters out, prepared for what sources called a showdown.
In the end, the state agents and the Department of Children and Families backed down, apparently concerned about confronting local police outside the hospice.
“We told them that unless they had the judge with them when they came, they were not going to get in,” said a source with the local police.
So, in essence, the Florida State Police were stared down by a bunch of Pinellas Park Podunk Pigs™.
Oh, that’ll  look good on the résumé, guys.
That tells me two things:
1) Jeb really doesn’t  have the balls to be governor – and, since his widdle brother Shrub didn’t do a damned thing about it, neither does he have the balls to be President.
2) It also tells me that Jefferson’s Tree of Liberty is a helluva lot drier than even I thought, and watering time is not far off.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 10:59
This is painless???  Dignified? This  is what Terri would have wanted, Mikey Shitstain?
Well, pardon me for saying so, but BULLSHIT!!!
Contrary to predictions that Terri Schiavo’s starvation death would be painless and dignified, an eyewitness who visited her hospice room early Saturday morning reports that she is now bleeding from the eyes and mouth.
Fox News Channel’s “Fox & Friends” reports:
“Barbara Weller, who’s is one of the attorneys for the Schindlers, says that the last time she checked in, not very many hours ago, Terri’s eyes and tongue were bleeding now.
“Her eyes are sunken and her skin continues to flake off,” Weller added.
On Thursday Terri’s parents reported that their daughter now resembles “an Auschwitz victim.”
Oh, yeah.  That’s  “death with dignity”.  That’s  “painless”???  That’s  “what she would have wanted”???
Oh.  Wait – no, it isn’t.
Another legal maneuver included a late afternoon filing asking Pinellas Circuit Judge George Greer to order the reinsertion of the tube, claiming Terri Schiavo tried to say “I want to live” when her tube was removed.
Well, so much for the claims of “persistent vegetative state”.
Hey, but it’s okay, isn’t it?  Like you pro-deathers keep saying – Terri’s not there anymore; Terri’s not a person anymore, she’s Mikey Shitstain’s property;  he can do with her what he wants, can’t he?
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 12:44
(Okay, Denizens, 48-hour rule in effect.)
Well, well, well.  Isn’t this interesting?
Terri Schiavo had a bad fight with her husband the night before she was discovered unconscious in the hallway of her St. Petersberg, Florida home fifteen years ago, and intended to seek a divorce, a close friend said Friday.
“They were talking about divorce at the time that Terri collapsed,” Jackie Rhodes told Fox News Channel’s “Fox & Friends.” Rhodes became a friend of Ms. Schiavo’s when they worked together at an insurance company.
Rhodes said the fight came as Terri and Michael considered splitting up.
“They were talking about a divorce at the time that Terri collapsed, and I do feel they were headed for divorce,” Rhodes said.
So.  They fight.  The very next night, Terri supposedly has a “heart attack” and suffers brain damage which puts her on a borderline between minimal consciousness and a vegetative state.
Mikey Shitstain tells a half-assed excuse-for-a-judge that Terri “wouldn’t want to live that way”.  Georgie-Porgie Greer, the Flamingo-Felching Fuckwit™ – who, it’s also interesting to note, doesn’t have all that great a track record when it comes to cases involving imminent danger to wives – buys the hearsay evidence  of Mikey Shitstain hook, line & sinker, and orders the feeding tube removed.
$700,000 has been set aside for Terri’s rehabilitation as part of a $1M malpractice settlement.  None of it has been spent on that rehab.  Mikey Shitstain stands to inherit the remaining balance of it when Terri dies.
No rehabilitative therapy has ever been given to Terri, and in fact, Mikey Shitstain has continuously halted all efforts to provide Terri any rehab at all.
Moreover, it’s now been alleged that this bastard injected Terri with insulin.
At last check, Terri wasn’t a diabetic.
I post this in part because some of you (Elisson, call your office) think that this so-called “Guardian Ad-Litem” report on Georgie-Porgie Dolphin-Humper’s desk portrays Mikey Shitstain as a doting husband who “did everything he could vis à vis rehabilitation, medical care, etc.”
Well, I call bullshit.  I think that this bastard attacked Terri the night after the argument, and he’s just trying to finish the job he started 15 years ago.  Because he knows that if Terri survives and rehabilitates to the point of coherence, she can finger him for attempted murder.
But that’s okay with some of you, isn’t it?  After all, Terri’s the exclusive property of Mikey Shitstain, isn’t she?
Just like in the good ol’ days.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 7:04
One is the highest-ranking elected official in Florida.  A man who, with one word, could save Terri Schiavo’s life.
The other is the most powerful man in the world.  The leader of the most powerful country on the face of the planet.
And both  of them have bowed in supplication to a flamingo-humping fucknozzle in a swamp.
It’s not often Gov. Jeb Bush is frustrated pursuing his goals. He was the first governor to start a statewide school voucher program. He got rid of civil service protections for tens of thousands of state workers. He pushed through billions of dollars in tax cuts. His goal of prolonging the life of Terri Schiavo is proving much harder.
“It is frustrating for people to think that I have power that I don’t, and not be able to act,” Bush told The Associated Press on Thursday. “I don’t have embedded special powers. I wish I did in this particular case.”
You have those powers, motherfucker.  Florida statutes clearly  mandate that you, through the Department of Children & Families, have the power to go in and take Terri Schiavo with or without Georgie-Porgie Dolphin-Felcher’s express say-so.  But your performance in this crisis clearly  indicates that you’re afraid to so much as take a shit without that fuckheaded bastard’s permission.
And your so-called “compassionate conservative” brother excuse-for-a-President has been deafening in his silence.  Shrubby won’t so much as lift a finger to save this innocent woman, and the fat-assed son-of-a-syphilitic-crack-whore-bitch excuse-for-a-husband who killed her is going to get off scot-free – all because you two cowardly fucks refused to get up off your yellow asses and do  something about it.
(UPDATE:  Oh, sure, he’ll get up in the middle of the night for a hot chocolate and sign a bill that tells others to do his dirty work for him  – “Here, Fed Judge, go look at this and we wish you’d maybe see it in your black heart to perhaps could possibly, y’know, reinsert a feeding tube if you find time…” – but he won’t send federal marshals down to Pinellas County to take Terri into protective custody?  He can hold terrorist suspects at Gitmo for God knows how long without so much as a habeas corpus,  but he can’t go save a dying woman???)
Well, this conservative pro-lifer will not forget.  And I’ll make sure my fellow conservative pro-lifers won’t forget, as well.
Say goodbye to your political chances in ’06, and you can forget about retaining any majorities in 2008.  You’ve taken us down this primrose path before – talk a good game, but then show a decided lack of balls when push came to shove over our issues.
Now your chickenshittery has cost a young, innocent woman her life, and the asswipe mass of rejected afterbirth is going to get away with murdering her.  And we in the pro-life movement hold you  responsible.
And from this point forward, we’re going to make you pay.