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Pat Sajak @patsajak
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Damn! Just about to settle in for SOTU when I remembered I haven’t watered my Chia Pets. Big collection. Will take time.
7:57 PM – 28 Jan 2014

BWAH~!!!!1!!!ONE!!1!!ELEVENTYTHOUSANDBILLION!!!!!1! 

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Fox News’ Juan Williams said earlier today that it’s Republicans’ fault that the Bambicare websites utterly failed like they did.

Yes, he really said that.

Yes, he really said that.

He also said that two-thirds of Americans want Republicans to ease up on criticizing Bambi & the Demoscum.

Why the hell  did Roger Ailes ever think it was a good idea to bring this asshat aboard?

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Item:  Bambi today blamed the recent partial governmental shutdown  on “meddling bloggers and ‘activists who profit from conflict’”.

Reaction:  Where’s my paycheck?

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After many years, we’ve finally found the fatal error in Firefox.

Mack Swaringen @mswaringen

Not sure why, but http://healthcare.gov only works with Firefox for me. On Chrome, IE, & Safari, it’s stuck on the waiting page. #obamacare
3:11 PM – 7 Oct 2013

I anticipate a patch no later than Firefox 26.0 Beta 3.  Which, come to think of it, should be just right around the corner…

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Bambi’s wanting to go toss some grenades (I’m working on my understatement.  How do you like it?) at Syria.

If there were a vote RightAboutNow™, he’d get his ass handed him.

The Praetor of the Ronulan Empire (aka Ron Paul), says it would be an “historic defeat”.

I’d call it Congress just doing its fucking job.  And long-effing-overdue, truth be told.

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(Hat tip:  Hoft.)

Drudge is reporting that Mo-Mo Morsi, late of the Mooselim Sisterhood (and one of Bambi’s butt-buddies), has had his ass unceremoniously dumped as Egypt’s president.

On Wednesday, Gen. Abdel Fatah Said Al-Sisi announced a military coup in Egypt. He said that the Constitution had been suspended, that early elections would take place, and that there would be a “code of ethics” for the media.

Would that something like that could happen…elsewhere. 

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Those of you who have read me for any  length of time – well, you probably knew it was coming all along, didn’t you? – but you know damned well what this is.

For now, click the link.  Go ahead.  Click it.  I effin’ dare  you.

And turn it up.  Waaaaaay  up.    )

That’s right, sportz fanz:  It’s vacation time for His Rudeness™.  A chance to Get Away From It All™, as it were.

Thanks to Bambi & his shitty economy, though, Mrs. Venomous & I are staying in town and not doing a helluva lot, due to the money just not being there.

MRS. VENOMOUS:  Ohhhhhh, don’t worry, sweetie.  We’ll find plenty  of things to do. (wink)

VENOMOUS

Vicar, General – you guys have the conn.  General…when you’re done chlorinating the gene pool of Twinkie-hating union goons down there in the Southern Command™, could I borrow another squadron of those black helicopters…? 

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(Hat tips:  Hoft & Drudge)

First-time jobless claims for this week:  439,000.

Inflation up.

Recession in Euroweaselstan – the second since 2009.  Headed here soon.

Yeah, Demo-bastards…how’s that hopey-changey shit working out for youse?

Fuck it all.

Let God’s judgement rain down on this country.  It’s earned it.

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The people in Ohio said that if I voted for Romney, their food stamps would be cut back.

Dammit, they were right!

Ohio families receiving food stamps could get an unwelcome surprise come January: $50 less every month in assistance.

For the 869,000 households enrolled in the program for the poorest Ohioans, that could amount to about $520 million annually out of the grocery budgets.

Because of the way the federal government calculates utility expenses for people receiving the benefit, a mild winter nationwide last year, and a lower price for natural gas, many families could experience a significant cut in aid, those familiar with the program say.

Recipients should get a letter from the state Department of Job and Family Services this month explaining the change, said Ben Johnson, a spokesman for the agency.

Gee, I guess elections have consequences, after all.

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(Hat tip:  Riehl.)

Denizens, remember when I said that Al-Obambi was cooking the books?

Chalk up yet another WITY™ for Yours Truly™.

Revisions to the way payroll data firm ADP counts private sector job creation have resulted in a sharp drop in the September employment count.

ADP’s new calculations put the monthly job creation at just 88,200, down from the 162,000 the firm originally reported earlier this month.

October doesn’t look like it’s going to be so hot, either.

Heckuva job, Barry.  You sure as hell did build that.

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Trillions in debt.

Running billion-dollar deficits out the effing wazoo.

The United States credit rating downgraded twice  in his four years occupying the White House.

A laughingstock overseas.

A United States ambassador (J. Christopher Stevens) murdered, sodomized, dragged through the streets of Libya and Cthulhu knows what  else.

Other US embassies attacked, vandalized and torched.

And all B. HUSSEIN!!!  Obambi can come up with…is Big Bird.

Nice. 

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Just got this from my sister-in-law.

It’s kinda long, so it’s below the fold, but you’ll like it, so read it.

That’s an order. 

COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America .

ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It’s 9%.

COSTELLO: That many people are out of work?

ABBOTT: No, that’s 16%.

COSTELLO: You just said 9%.

ABBOTT: 9% Unemployed.

COSTELLO: Right 9% out of work.

ABBOTT: No, that’s 16%.

COSTELLO: Okay, so it’s 16% unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, that’s 9%…

COSTELLO: WAIT A MINUTE.

Is it 9% or 16%?

ABBOTT: 9% are unemployed. 16% are out of work.

COSTELLO: IF you are out of work you are unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, Obama said you can’t count the “Out of Work” as the unemployed.

You have to look for work to be unemployed.

COSTELLO: BUT THEY ARE OUT OF WORK!!!

ABBOTT: No, you miss his point.

COSTELLO: What point?

ABBOTT: Someone who doesn’t look for work, can’t be counted with those who look for work. It wouldn’t be fair.

COSTELLO: To whom?

ABBOTT: The unemployed.

COSTELLO: But they are ALL out of work.

ABBOTT: No, the unemployed are actively looking for work. Those who are out of work gave up looking and if you give up, you are no longer in the ranks of the unemployed.

COSTELLO: So if you’re off the unemployment roles, that would count as less unemployment?

ABBOTT: Unemployment would go down. Absolutely!

COSTELLO: The unemployment just goes down because you don’t look for work?

ABBOTT: Absolutely it goes down. That’s how Obama gets it to 9%.

Otherwise it would be 16%. He doesn’t want you to read about 16% unemployment.

COSTELLO: That would be tough on his reelection.

ABBOTT: Absolutely.

COSTELLO: Wait, I got a question for you. That means there are two ways to bring down the unemployment number?

ABBOTT: Two ways is correct.

COSTELLO: Unemployment can go down if someone gets a job?

ABBOTT: Correct.

COSTELLO: And unemployment can also go down if you stop looking for a job?

ABBOTT: Bingo.

COSTELLO: So there are two ways to bring unemployment down, and the easier of the two is to have Obama’s supporters stop looking for work.

ABBOTT: Now you’re thinking like the Obama Economy Czar.

COSTELLO: I don’t even know what the hell I just said!

ABBOTT: Now you’re thinking like Obama.

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He’s cooking the fucking books.

Period, end, stop.

And anyone who believes this number should not only have their head examined…they should be prohibited from voting, they’re that stupid.

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I.  DON’T.  MOTHER.  FUCKING.  THINK!!!  SO!!!!

One step closer, Demoscum.

One.  Fucking.  Step.  Closer.

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Denizens, the Comment of the Month™ comes from someone moniker’d “Love of Country” over at Twitchy.  (Yeah, it’s Malicious Malkin’s site – so what?)

Below the fold, ’cause it’s rather long – but it’s Well Worth Your Time™.  So click it awready, hm?

YES I CAN – Give thanks to the state run media for making all things possible
YES I CAN – Make the largest number of BROKEN PROMISES ever
YES I CAN – Enable the largest number of home forclosures ever
YES I CAN – Promise a new era of civility and then deliberately rip the country in two with unseen fervor and resolve
YES I CAN – Create the largest number of AGENDA-SETTING FAILURES ever
YES I CAN – Make the largest number of SELF-SERVING SPEECHES ever
YES I CAN – Have an incompetent, brown-nosing tax cheat for Secretary of Treasury
YES I CAN – Finally admit Hope and Change was merely a calculated rouse for gullible , low information, racist trolls
YES I CAN – KiII you, an American citizen, with a predator drone if I think you just might deserve it
YES I CAN – Lie my way into two illegal wars while falsely accusing my predecessor of the same thing
YES I CAN – Give ENTITLEMENT PROGRAMS for ILLEGAL ALIENS
YES I CAN – Have sanctuary cities for illegals
YES I CAN – Create the largest DEFICIT ever
YES I CAN – Champion the life long slacker while publicly demonizing those who did everything by the book
YES I CAN – Make ad hominem attacks against the GOP in evey single speech I ever make
YES I CAN – Expand the powers of Eminent Domain to seize YOUR property …
YES I CAN – Tell my Justice Dept not to prosecute bIack people if the accuser is white
YES I CAN – Fail to punish the BIack Panthers who were on film intimidating voters at the voting station with weapons
YES I CAN – Do nothing about the Gulf oil spill for two months
YES I CAN – TAX, BORROW & SPEND 5 TRILLION dollars after promising PAY-GO
YES I CAN – Tell Latinos that Republicans are their ENEMIES and fan the flames of racism for political gain
YES I CAN – Spend millions in legal fees to keep my real birth certificate hidden
YES I CAN – Run and ruin YOUR life
YES I CAN – Increase the size of government
YES I CAN – Spend YOUR TAX DOLLARS on failed programs
YES I CAN – Maliciously slander the Tea Party while PRAISING union thugs
YES I CAN – Put more people on the Govt dole to rob them of their drive and dignity for political gain
YES I CAN – Continue all of Bush’s National Defense policies after tirelessly painting him as the Devil
YES I CAN – Create more unnecessary, crippling regulations
YES I CAN – Create more wasteful spending
YES I CAN – Be the first president to require all Americans to purchase a product from a third party
YES I CAN – Appear on MSNBC and say Fox News is not really a news organization
YES I CAN – Tell congress to pass the Dream Act for illegal aliens
YES I CAN – Sue Arizona for defending itself from ILLEGAL ALIENS
YES I CAN – Increase GOVERNMENT CORRUPTION 20 Fold
YES I CAN – Take over banks, auto manufacturers and the economy
YES I CAN – Call any and all spending cuts pure evil when proposed by Republicans
YES I CAN – Cause the credit rating in America to fall for the first time ever
YES I CAN – Gladly add 15 million slackers to Food Stamps
YES I CAN – Bow to other world leaders like a TRAINED FLEA
YES I CAN – Earnestly promote union card check strictly for purposes of intimidation to CONTROL who YOU vote for
YES I CAN – Feign and scream racism when an Arizona Governor enforces immigration laws
YES I CAN – Fill my cabinent with unelected czars like self avowed Communists Van Jones and Anita Dunn
YES I CAN – Shut down oil drilling on Public lands and take credit for all the drilling done during the Bush Administration
YES I CAN – Turn the highest office of the land into a laughingstock of the world at your expense …. your kids’, too
YES I CAN – Take several vacations while millions of gallons of oil leak into the gulf and destroy whitey’s way of life
YES I CAN – Force healthcare down America’s throat that 76 % opposed
YES I CAN – Be the most non transparent president of all times
YES I CAN – Take a 17 day vacation during the worst economy in decades
YES I CAN – Make sure GE pays no taxes on 15 billion dollars worth of profits
YES I CAN – Tell 1000 lies and FULLY EXPECT the State Run Media to completely ignore, spin, or bury all of them
YES I CAN – By-pass Congress and implement the Dream Act through executive fiat
YES I CAN – Give a great speech until the TELEPROMPTER goes down….
YES I CAN – Divide the USA like never seen since the Civil war
YES I CAN – Keep my main agenda to turn the USA into a SOCIALIST FAILURE
YES I CAN – Blame anything that goes wrong on my watch on the last administration even after 4 years
YES I CAN – Apply for college aid as a foreign student and then pretend it never happened
YES I CAN – Create 450,000 new govt jobs and dozens of new bureaucracies …. all paid for with your taxes
YES I CAN – Visit all 57 states
YES I CAN – Forget how old my daughters are
YES I CAN – Subvert the American people at every conceivable turn
YES I CAN – Speak Austrian
YES I CAN – Speak from a teleprompter at my kids’ birthday parties
YES I CAN – Be the TROJAN HORSE that brings America to her knees
YES I CAN – Promise to cut the deficit in half and then more than double it
YES I CAN – File lawsuits against half a dozen states
YES I CAN – Have a portrait of Mao Tse Tung on my Whitehouse Christmas Tree ornaments
YES I CAN – Have the fastest dive in popularity ever for a President
YES I CAN – Take dozens of uber lavish vacations at YOUR expense during the economic crisis of a lifetime
YES I CAN – Destroy the oil and gas industry and blame the Republicans with the aid of the state-run-media
YES I CAN – Count on LAZY, RACIST, FOOLS to vote for me AGAIN in 2012
YES I CAN – Operate on infinite spin cycle and hope no one catches on
YES I CAN – Have the FCC illegally take over the internet
YES I CAN – Give the nuclear advantage to the Russians and give the nuke to Iran
YES I CAN – Start a war in Libya and by-pass going to congress for approval
YES I CAN – Say the Cambridge Police acted stupidly
YES I CAN – Violate the War Powers Act
YES I CAN – Have a hearty laugh with my henchmen over the lack of shovel ready jobs
YES I CAN – Tell the Russians I will have much more flexibility after the elections
YES I CAN – Turn the EPA into the fascist arm of my government
YES I CAN – Have sanctuary cities for illegals
YES I CAN – Provide guns for drug cartels to use against us and kiII our BORDER AGENTS
YES I CAN – Support Palestine while throwing Israel under the bus
YES I CAN – Be the most partisan president of all times inspite of my numerous campaign promises to the contrary
YES I CAN – Create the largest DEFICIT ever …. we’re talking biblical proportions, people
YES I CAN – Champion the life long slacker while publicly demonizing/castigating those who did everything by the book
YES I CAN – Burn 9000 gallons of jet fuel on Earth Day
YES I CAN – Kick Republicans in the teeth in EVERY single speech I ever make
YES I CAN – Expand the powers of Eminent Domain to seize YOUR property …. my reasons are little of your business
YES I CAN – Tell my Justice Dept not to prosecute bIack people if the accuser is white
YES I CAN – Fail to punish the BIack Panthers who were on film intimidating voters at the voting station with weapons
YES I CAN – Wait two months to start helping those white Repunlicans whose businesses were hurt by the gulf oil spill
YES I CAN – TAX, BORROW & SPEND 5 TRILLION dollars after promising PAY-GO
YES I CAN – Tell Latinos that Republicans are their ENEMIES and fan the flames of racism for political gain
YES I CAN – Spend millions in legal fees to keep my real birth certificate hidden
YES I CAN – Run and ruin YOUR life
YES I CAN – Increase the size of government
YES I CAN – Spend YOUR TAX DOLLARS on failed programs
YES I CAN – Maliciously slander the Tea Party while PRAISING union thugs
YES I CAN – Put more people on the Govt dole to rob them of their drive and dignity for political gain
YES I CAN – Continue all of Bush’s National Defense policies after tirelessly painting him as the Devil
YES I CAN – Create more unnecessary, crippling regulations
YES I CAN – KiII NASA
YES I CAN – Be against Chick-fil-A
YES I CAN – Be against fracking
YES I CAN – Be against farmers
YES I CAN – Be against cattle ranchers
YES I CAN – Be against budgets
YES I CAN – Be against home Bible studies
YES I CAN – Be against state’s rights
YES I CAN – Be against the unborn
YES I CAN – Be against gold miners in Alaska
YES I CAN – Overturn Welfare Reform and make it 10x easier for lazy recipients to milk the system in return for votes
YES I CAN – Have a father who was a radical revolutionary communist
YES I CAN – Have a step father who was a radical revolutionary communist
YES I CAN – Have a mother who was a radical revolutionary communist
YES I CAN – Have a grandmother who was a radical revolutionary communist
YES I CAN – Have a high school mentor who was a radical revolutionary communist
YES I CAN – Start a race war
YES I CAN – Start a class war
YES I CAN – Start a gender war
YES I CAN – Start a generational war
YES I CAN – Praise State Run Media while bashing Fox, the very salvation of America and American values
YES I CAN – Give waivers to all groups who supported Owebamacare in the most profoundly disturbing hypocrisy ever
YES I CAN – Produce 1/2 of 1% of all the power we need as a nation with Green energy so let’s stop drilling now
YES I CAN – Play golf and fill out brackets at the same time
YES I CAN – Personify hypocrisy, racism, subversion and fascism all at the same time
YES I CAN – Sue more states than anyone thought possible or certainly ever imagined
YES I CAN – Shut down the Gulf while investing in Petrobras and other George Soros owned entities
YES I CAN – Effectively put every American in the country at each others’ throats
YES I CAN – Have a social security number from a state I never lived in
YES I CAN – Destroy the human spirit on the Left with entitlement addiction in exchange for political power
YES I CAN – Laugh at all the fools who believed me when I said I had shovel-ready jobs
YES I CAN – Attack the constitution to such a degree that even my own Secret Service cannot respect me
YES I CAN – Destroy the oil and gas industry while telling you I’m the only reason for their current success
YES I CAN – Turn my back on the keystone pipeline cause I want 8 dollar a gallon gasoline
YES I CAN – Get all of my talking points from Media Matters …. same goes for MSDNC
YES I CAN – Aspire to 8 dollar gallons of gasoline and try my best to blame it on Republicans
YES I CAN – Act like Solyndra and Fast and Furious were no big deal and deny justice for Brian Terry’s family
YES I CAN – Abate and annul bankruptcy law and turn over control of companies to union supporters
YES I CAN – Destroy the USA
YES I CAN – Be from Kenya

YES I CAN – Be One and Done!

Damn.  Just, damn.

Well done, LoC.  (Even if it is  a C&P job, nice catch.)

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