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Even before I ripped on Michelle “Malicious” Malkin for her hypocritical photoshop of Rick Perry over GAAAAAARRRRRRRRDDDDDIIIIIIISSSSSSIIIIIIILLLLLLLL – right after she bitched about Spewsweek’s  Tina Brown performing her own “stupid photo trick” (Malicious’ words, not mine) against her honeygirl, Michele Bachmann – there was always something about her that rubbed me the wrong way.  A hunch, if you will.

Well, now I know why:  Malicious Malkin is a fucking stoner.

It’s 9 a.m. on a weekday, and I’m at the Marisol Therapeutics pot shop. This is serious business. Security is tight. ID checks are frequent. Merchandise is strictly regulated, labeled, wrapped and controlled. The store is clean, bright and safe. The staffers are courteous and professional. Customers of all ages are here.

There’s a middle-aged woman at the counter nearby who could be your school librarian. On the opposite end of the dispensary, a slender young soldier in a wheelchair with close-cropped hair, dressed in his fatigues, consults with a clerk. There’s a gregarious cowboy and an inquisitive pair of baby boomers looking at edibles. A dude in a hoodie walks in with his backpack.

And then there’s my husband and me.

[...]

Our stash included 10 pre-rolled joints, a “vape pen” and two containers of cheddar cheese-flavored marijuana crackers (they were out of brownies). So far, just one cracker a day is yielding health benefits. Carole [her mother-in-law  - DV] is eating better than she has in three months. For us, there’s no greater joy than sharing the simple pleasure of gathering in the kitchen for a meal, with Grandma Carole at the head of the table.

I don’t give a flying fuck at a rolling donut hole, quite honestly, if she does  claim it’s “medical”. They make THC in pill format.  Her MIL could go the pill route and get the same benefit.

But no.  That’s not good enough for the special snowflake Malicious Malkin. Gotta be the joint, don’tcha know. 1ooo/ (Pretend that’s my left hand.)

Don’t get me wrong – I don’t want to see anyone, not the least of whom is Malicious Malkin’s mommy-in-law, suffer needlessly.  But there are other ways to treat “Grandma Carole’s” condition, better ways, and a joint ain’t one of ‘em.

But that’s Malicious Malkin for you.  It’s all about her and her support for pot, both “medicinal” and recreational, to hell with what’s right or proper.

(Or legal, for that matter.  Don’t forget, pot’s still a federal no-no, never mind what the Ayatollah Choomster thinks.)

Just like how she whined about Tina Brown, but felt perfectly justified when it’s her slandering Rick Perry.

Fuck off, Malicious, you effing stoner.

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Five’ll get you a hundred that Philip Seymour Hoffman got his start on marijuana.

Morons in Colorado & Washington State, take note.

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Y’know, Denizens, usually I’m in whole-hearted agreement with the good folks over at Downtrend.com – they’re a conservative, anti-Bambi lot whose words I often enjoy reading.

But not this time.

Rapper 2 Chainz and his entire entourage were arrested on drug charges Tuesday, after their bus was stopped for having a broken tail light. After smelling traces of weed and seeing smoke in the bus, the police felt this was enough “probable cause” to search the vehicle.

Got news for you, Nathan Eyre:  the police were right.  Visible smoke, combined with the scent of pot does, indeed, constitute probable cause.

Ain’t no “felt”, nor sneer-quotes about it.

Aw, come on! Is that all you got?! >

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Actually, I can’t really take credit for this WITY™ – but I’ll be happy to credit blogger Billy Johnson, Jr, whom I quoted here:

While the cause of death has not yet been revealed, one can only wonder whether it was drug-related.

The results of the autopsy were released today.  Annnnnnnd…bingo.

Whitney Houston was a chronic cocaine user who had the drug in her system when she drowned in a hotel bathtub, coroner’s officials said Thursday after releasing autopsy findings that also noted heart disease contributed to her death.

The disclosure ended weeks of speculation about what killed the Grammy-winning singer on Feb. 11 on the eve of the Grammy Awards.

[...]

Coroner’s Chief of Operations Craig Harvey said cocaine and its byproducts were found in Houston’s system, and the drug was listed as a contributing factor in her death. He said the results indicated Houston was a chronic cocaine user.

Okay, that’s the WITY™ for Mr. Johnson.  Here’s my  WITY™.

Toxicology results also showed Houston had marijuana, Xanax, the muscle relaxant Flexeril, and the allergy medication Benadryl in her system. Houston died just hours before she was scheduled to appear at producer Clive Davis’ pre-Grammy Awards bash.

Uh-huh.

What?  Did?  I?  Tell Ya™???

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This…is not  good.

Fifteen TCU students, including four members of the football team, were among 18 people arrested early Wednesday after a six-month drug sting in which deals allegedly went down everywhere from players’ homes to a Hooters restaurant.

[...]

The bust ensnared members of the Horned Frog football team, which recently celebrated an invitation to the Big 12 conference, and information in the documents revealed a surprise team-wide drug test on National Signing Day.

I am reminded of a time nearly 30 years ago.  TCU’s new head coach, Jim Wacker, had just led his Horned Frogs to an 8-4 record and a berth in the Bluebonnet Bowl, and things were looking good for the Purple & White for the foreseeable future.

Then came 1985.

NCAA investigators arrived on the Texas Christian University campus Wednesday to look into reports that as many as 29 players accepted money from alumni trying to beef up the school’s football program.

[...]

TCU turned itself in to the NCAA for inspection and suspended seven players, including All-American running back Kenneth Davis, who admitted taking money from boosters.

The resulting scandal crippled the Frog program for 15 years.  Only when Dennis Franchione brought his act from New Mexico did Frog fortunes begin to turn.

Now we’ve got this.  And it’s all over the media here – the three four major affiliates, ESPN – everyone’s covering it.  Dale Hansen even went “unplugged” on it (gee, wonder why the fatass never goes “unplugged” when something good  happens to them, hm?).

One of the perps, Devin Johnson, stated to police that as many as 82 players failed a mandatory drug test sprung on the players by Gary Patterson on Feb 1st.  And if that’s  the case, one wonders how long it’ll cripple TCU this  time.

I’ve got a bad  feeling about this…

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Y’know, I was going to try and offer a short eulogy/tribute to Whitney Houston – who, as I’m sure you guys are all aware by now, died yesterday at the age of 48…

…but then I read this from Yahoo! music blogger Billy Johnson, Jr.

Too many of us—myself included—are guilty of making insensitive jokes about the demise of Whitney Houston, her frail frame, loss of one of pop’s purest voices, and battle with drugs.

But none of us are laughing now.

[...]

Houston’s fans were concerned when she married R&B bad boy Bobby Brown in 1992, but they professed their happiness.

By the late 1990s, Houston’s drug problems began to become tabloid fodder. In a 2002 interview with ABC’s Diane Sawyer, Houston admitted to her struggles, but maintained that she was doing fine.

The public received its first real glimpse of Houston behind-the-scenes in 2004 when she appeared on Brown’s reality series “Being Bobby Brown.” The bad publicity move depicted Houston as profane, combative, and delusional, seemingly supporting the behavior of someone on drugs.

Among the saddest indications of Houston’s fall was her 2009 comeback album, “I Look To You.” While the album received positive reviews, her live performances signaled that the damage to her voice was beyond repair.

Concertgoers stormed out of her 2010 “Nothing But Love World Tour” angry, complaining that Houston was not fit to sing live, and they demanded that their ticket costs be refunded.

On stage, Houston made light of her vocal struggles, and even seemed to be confident when doing so.

But the public scrutiny intensified, and was followed by additional stints in rehab.

While the cause of death has not yet been revealed, one can only wonder whether it was drug-related.

I think that, of this, there can be little doubt.

People like me have been shouting loud & long from the rooftops about the dangers of illegal drug use, from marijuana right on up the scale (pun not really intended, but it fits here, doesn’t it?).  For our efforts, we’re pooh-poohed, laughed at, ostracized, sniffed at, dismissed and just generally treated like pond scum by the so-called “enlightened” among elitist shits who think that there’s no harm in “just a little recreational drug use”.  Just a li’l toak ever’ now-and-then, cain’t be allllll that  bad, now can it?

Whitney Houston very likely started with marijuana.  You tell me.

Rest in peace, Whitney.

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On a rerun of the program Gene Simmons Family Jewels, I have just overheard Gene saying he was responsible for developing the careers of the group Pet Shop Boys.

Reaction:  Oh, shit – you mean it’s all his  fault? 

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Maybe Detroit isn’t such a worthless town after all.

Behold Chuckles Sheen in all his…uh…”glory”…at the opening of his so-called “Violent Torpedo of Truth” tour in the Motor City.

Yeah, that’s the ticket. 

Reportedly, he did better in Shit-caca…but then, that’s Shit-caca, Ill-noise for you.

Save yourself from this  one, “Warlock”. 

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How high has Carlos “Charlie Sheen” Estevez jumped his personal shark?

Even his publicist can’t take any more.

Veteran Hollywood publicist Stan Rosenfield, who represented Charlie Sheen through the actor’s rehab attempts and breakup with his employers on the hit sitcom “Two and a Half Men,” abruptly resigned on Monday.

“I have worked with Charlie Sheen for a long time and I care about him very much,” Rosenfield wrote in a brief statement. “However, at this time, I’m unable to work effectively as his publicist and have respectfully resigned.” In a follow-up e-mail, Rosenfield said he had represented Sheen for at least seven years.

The move came on the same day that Sheen turned up in another round of interviews on ABC, NBC, TMZ and elsewhere, attacking everyone from CBS to his father, former “The West Wing” star Martin Sheen. Since CBS and Warner Bros. decided last week to halt production on “Two and a Half Men” after Sheen attacked his boss, Chuck Lorre, the actor has gone on a manic round of media interviews.

Damn.  Just, damn.

Just an idle thought here:  Five’ll get you ten he started with pot. y’think?

Just sayin’.

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(Hat tip to Allahpundit.)

Pat Robertson, people, has jumped the shark.

Count this among the 10 things nobody ever expected to see in their lifetimes: 700 Club founder Pat Robertson, one of the cornerstone figures of America’s Christian right movement, has come out in favor of legalizing marijuana.

Calling it getting “smart” on crime

…Robertson became a fool.

Well, at least there’s Scriptural precedent, y’know?

Robertson aired a clip on a recent episode of his 700 Club television show that advocated the viewpoint of drug law reformers who run prison outreach ministries.

Yeah, y’know, Pat – drug runners have a “prison outreach ministry”, too.  Usually, it has something to do with passing along instructions on how to run the cartel.

A narrator even claimed that religious prison outreach has “saved” millions in public funds by helping to reduce the number of prisoners who return shortly after being released.

Yeah, I’ll just bet.  Or maybe it’s just a strong desire to avoid a return “engagement” as Bubba’s bitch, if you will.

“It got to be a big deal in campaigns: ‘He’s tough on crime,’ and ‘lock ‘em up!’” the Christian Coalition founder said. “That’s the way these guys ran and, uh, they got elected. But, that wasn’t the answer.”

Uh, Patricia?  Yes, it was.  “Lock ‘em up”, and keep locking ‘em up until the drug-addled dumbasses get the clue.

Who knows?  Maybe one of ‘em will pick up the one you’ve lost, Pattianne.

I think, over the next few days/weeks, you will see donations to the 700 Club take a plunge off the cliff.  Followed shortly, of course, by Pattianne Robertson’s sudden decision to “retire” to “spend more time with his family”.

Perhaps they can spend it toking. 

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(Should be a hat tip here, but I don’t quite know upon whom I should bestow it, so…)

Probably gonna get a WITY™ from HDD on this one – but, what the hell, I prob’ly deserve it.

Denizens, for lo these last two years or so, you guys know I’ve been an ardent supporter of Sarah Palin.  Even when she started saying and doing things that raised the proverbial SpatulaEyebrow, I was in her corner, and would have supported her in any political venture she chose to undertake.  (And maybe the fact that she’s a hawtie with a nice rack had something to do with that.  Bite Sue me.)

Aw, come on! Is that all you got?! >

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(Hat tip Doug Powers off a buzzworthy from Michelle Malkin.)

The “Down Is Up, Up Is Down” Department, seeing His Rudeness™ feeling like crap the last few days, has decided to try and brighten his mood by telling him a funny.

I mean, how else  could you explain Kaiser Wilhelm von Slickmeister going all PotKettleBlack™ on us, hm?

Former President Clinton has sent out a fundraising letter on behalf of the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee under his own name warning that Republicans are trying to “derail’ President Obama’s agenda.

Gee, he says that like it’s a Bad Thing™…

Yes, Der Kaiser, but we’re not trying to “derail”-sneer-quotes it, we’re trying to derail it.

Destroy it.

Disrupt it.

Put.  A.  Fuckin’.  Stop.  To.  It.

What specific part of that does your feeble, one-track-only-and-that’s-sex mind not effing understand, hmmm?

Oxford must have been pretty damned desperate to have taken you as a student, lemme tell ya.

Not much unexpected there.

Well, at least someone  at the Post gets it.

But along with the letter, Clinton has included a flyer from the DSCC that’s bound to raise eyebrows.

Okay, Denizens, last warning.  I’m putting the money-quote here below the fold.  Make sure you’re sitting down before you open it up.  MASSIVE SPEW WARNINGS.

Aw, come on! Is that all you got?! >

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If you ask me – and I know you didn’t, like I give a flying… – the motherfucking bastards who came up with this idea should be shot on sight.

— A New York City-funded guidebook for heroin users offers information on how to prepare drugs carefully and care for veins to avoid infection.

The state’s top official with the Drug Enforcement Administration calls the “Take Charge Take Care” guide a “step-by-step instruction on how to inject a poison.” DEA special agent-in-charge John Gilbride says the handout is disturbing.

Which – and do  pardon me for pointing this out – was still illegal, last time I checked…?

“Oh, well, don’t break the law, yer not s’posed to, but if you do, here’s how you do it…”

Oh, well, don’t blast a .45-caliber hole through someone else’s head, mkay?  But if you really wanna, this is how ya go about it…

Great.  Honkin.  Cthulu. 

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So on one of the 411 Mania wrestling pages we get where one of the indy wrestlers is calling out the guy known as Rob Van Dam for being a stoner.

(Which is why I have no particular use for Rob Van Dam, but that’s another post.)

Anyway, “Damien Demento” (probably not his real name, but who gives a shit; Van Dam isn’t his  real name, either) attracts his share of stoner pussies who whine and bleat and generally berate him for having more common sense than a gnat’s ass.

(Which in itself is yet more than these stoner pussies have combined, but that’s yet another post.)

Anyway, this comment caught my eye (you’ll have to search for it – there’s no direct link):

So Americans don’t have self control? So what else should be kept away from us? If I can’t control myself what else should I be banned from having?

My vote goes for “oxygen”. 

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