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Yup, that’s right….we all know Darth has HT’d this writer something close to ad nauseum.  Then again, she is good.  And generally right on target too!

So what’s Michelle Malkin targeting now.  Well, none other than the DREAM Act: Electric Amnesty Boogaloo, Part Deux.

Once again the, democrappers are trying to convince us it’s a really, really, REALLY good idea to grant amnesty to the 20+ something MILLION illegal aliens residing inside our borders. 

Felipe Calderon, white courtesy phone.  Yo dude, fix YOUR government before you go suggesting and subsequently start PUSHING your citizens to enter MY country ILLEGALLY.  Mkay hombre?  You habla????

K. Thx. BuhBye.

Holy WTF is going on here????  The progressive asswipes in the Senate seriously think that trying to disguise an AMNESTY bill as an EDUCATION bill is gonna cut it?  Hello CLUEBAT?   Remember how you just had to pick up yo nappy 7-day shitters off the floor back oh gee, just like what TWENTY-EIGHT DAYS AGO!?!??!?!?!?!  If you really need some more whomp up side yo head with the Ronco Cluebat™ we CAN arrange it.

Come on Michelle, tell us what you REALLY think about this bill…..

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Unfortunately, it’s not the round, orange vegetable variety that got chunked.  Read on here.

Sorry about the play on words, but I’m right in the middle of stress relieving measures that involves large quantities of adult carbonated beverages. 

Time for the eye for an eye concept of justice RSN.

UPDATE:&#160 (From Venomous) Added to the “Sickening Stuff” category.

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Didja see this?

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Except this time the egg was something north of 250k State Department documents.  And Humpty is Wikileaks. The dumping is still the same.

Normally I would agree (within reason mind you) with the argument that releasing classified intelligence information is REALLY not good for the folks “in country”, but something strikes me different about this documentus dumpicus.  Now given that the loudest shrilling is coming from a progressive-lite Republican by the name of Peter King and he’s calling for the Secretary of Frump and Eric “I employ illegal aliens as housekeepers” Holder to designate Wikileaks as a domestic terror organization, I get the unabated sense that something is wrong.

And I have an idea what it could be.  Once again, the “most ethical and transparent administration in the history of the U.S” (Nancy SanFran Piglousy’s words, not mine) got caught with their pants down fornicating away with those at the center of all these documents.  Namely which is Al Queda and those nation-states that support it.  Now OF COURSE each and every member of the House Homeland Security Committee has read EVERY word of all 250,000+ documents released and can say with 100% assurance that “it’s not us”.

I say BULLSHIT and I’m calling global shenanigans on this one.

Al-Obambi’s foreign policy ain’t worth the paper the documents are printed on.  Then again, the domestic policy ain’t in much better shape either!

So I say, let’s see all 250,000+ documents and we prosecute the REAL criminals and let Wikileaks do it’s job. Because no other REAL news organization (yes I’m glaring straight at you CNN, (P)MSNBC, New York Times, Washington Post, and Politico) seems to be able to do their job.

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(Hat tip Doug Powers on Michelle’s site.)

Every so often, I’ll post on someone who’s just shuffled off this mortal coil, and I’ll say something like “condolences from the Realm&#153, so-and-so’ll be missed.”

But Denizens, I gotta tell ya – this one hurts like Hell.

Leslie Nielsen, who traded in his dramatic persona for inspired bumbling as a hapless doctor in “Airplane!” and the accident-prone detective Frank Drebin in “The Naked Gun” comedies, died on Sunday in Fort Lauderdale, Fla. He was 84.

The Canadian-born actor died from complications from pneumonia at a hospital near his home at 5:34 p.m., surrounded by his wife, Barbaree, and friends, his agent John S. Kelly said in a statement.

“We are saddened by the passing of beloved actor Leslie Nielsen, probably best remembered as Lt. Frank Drebin in ‘The Naked Gun’ series of pictures, but who enjoyed a more than 60-year career in motion pictures and television,” said Kelly.

I only saw him in the aforementioned Airplane!&#160 and Naked Gun&#160 flicks, as well as Gun’s&#160 predecessor, Police Squad! – all six episodes of it.&#160 (Yeah, the article says there were four – don’t believe it, there were six.)&#160 Not many things or persons have caused me to literally ROFL – but Leslie Nielsen did, every time he tried it.

Dammit, Leslie – you left us too effing soon.&#160 There’s a hole in my funny-bone where you’d taken up permanent residence, and this pain’ll be felt for a while.

I pray God will bless your family during this time.&#160 You were loved, and you’ll be seriously missed.

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And the final from Reno, NV:

#3 Smurf Turf Bullshit State 31, at #19 Nevada 34

It is a Perfect Football Weekend&#153 already.&#160 I don’t give a shit what&#160 the rest of my teams do.

Woo-Fuckin’-Hoo!!!!!&#160

UPDATE:&#160 ESPN showed one of the Wolfpack touchdowns coming off what looked like a double reverse (though it coulda been just a single – I only got one look at it).

Memo to Chrissy Peterson:&#160 Live by the trick play, die by the trick play, you dumbass.

Couldn’t happen to a nicer team.&#160

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As always, Ann Coulter gets it right.

If our elected leaders were required to undergo the same security inconveniences as are we, they would change things, and do so quickly.

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(Yeah, it’s a rerun of a rerun of a rerun.&#160 Of a rerun.&#160 Et cetera, ad infinitum, ad nauseam.&#160 Bite Sue me, mkay?&#160 I’m busy cooking. )

I first penned (penned?) this screed (g) on 11/17/01.&#160 I thought it appropriate then (and still do), it being Thanksgiving and all, to jot down a list of those things for which I was thankful.&#160 This year the tradition continues, below the fold, as usual with only a few minor tweaks to keep things current:

First of all, let me once again apologize for not blogging as much as I wish I could.&#160 Ideally, I’d be cranking out two or three posts a day.&#160 There’s certainly that much going on in the world, and it tears at my gut to be missing the opportunities to write about these things.&#160 Pains me even more to think that you, the Denizens, are missing out on most of My Eternal Wisdom&#153.&#160

The fact is that I simply have not had time to do one of the things that I enjoy more than I ever thought I would – writing.&#160 I never for a moment, sitting in my first ever English Composition college class twenty-five years ago, taught by a guy I believed to be an idiot, thought that I would ever come to the point that I actually got a kick out of slapping thoughts on page.

Amazing how things change.

But, I digress.&#160 There’s not been enough time.&#160 There’s never&#160 been enough time, but that’s beside the point.&#160 I’ve been swamped at work, and that’s when I’m not trying to renew a certification.&#160 This is taking me away from the chores I need to be doing – keeping the house clean, doing the laundry in a timely fashion, cleaning the kitchen, picking up dog crap off the carpet, those sorts of things.&#160 Plus, there’s the chore of moving, which (for this year, anyway) means squeezing three bedrooms full o’ stuff that was already packed into two bedrooms, and trying to fit it all into a one-bedroom apartment.&#160 And when I do finally get around to those things, they keep me from doing stuff I like to do – like surfing the Web and writing these columns.

Which brings me around to the topic at hand.&#160 Thanksgiving’s today, and it’s a good time to kick back and tick off the things for which your obdt.&#160 svt.&#160 (a little Blackie Sherrod lingo, there) is thankful:

God.&#160 The God of the Bible.&#160 The God of Abraham, Issac, Jacob, David and Solomon.&#160 That&#160 God.&#160 Not Allah, not Muhammad, not Cthulu, not crystals and/or chakras and/or trees.&#160 God.&#160 Too damned few of us show our Creator too damned little appreciation for everything He’s given us, and do trust me when I tell you that that little tidbit has not&#160 escaped His attention.

His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ, and the work He performed on the cross that allowed me to receive His salvation.&#160 (An aside:&#160 Yeah, in case anyone didn’t know – I’m a Christian.&#160 Not anywhere close to being the best example thereof, to be sure, but I’m still being worked on, and you’re just gonna have to be patient. (grin))

Being an American, and free to worship as I choose.&#160 For now, given whom the morons of this country just put into office.

My wife, Mrs. Venomous.&#160 Yes, Denizens, I haven’t really mentioned it all that much this pas year, given my track record with such pronouncements (rueful grin) – but it’s once more through the marriage breach, dear friends.&#160 That’s five now – yes, it does pain me to say that – and So Help Me Cthulu&#153, this is the last one, forever & ever, a-freakin’-men.&#160 But this one has convinced me that the institution of marriage really is a Good Thing&#153 – she cares for me more than the other four combined.&#160 (No offense intended, D.)

My current home – a one-story, one-bedroom jobber I share with the aforementioned Mrs, a chow/terrier and a huge lump of muscle & energy in the shape of a collie/sheltie mix.&#160 Not the cozy cottage in Forney, but at least I have an office again from which to pen (pen?) these screeds.

My son – Stephen Geoffrey “Skip” Crager, Jr.&#160 (although his doublewide-assed mother insists on calling him “Geoffrey”).&#160 Even though I haven’t seen you since 2003, Skip, I still love you.&#160 Always will.&#160 Always remember that.

Friends & family, some more than others.&#160 Even the ones who are diametrically opposed to me in their beliefs.

And while I’m thinking about it – and I should have really mentioned this last year, too – my sister in law.&#160 My brother, heretofore doomed to a lifetime of Eternal Bachelorhood&#153 – not necessarily a Bad Thing&#153, given his sibling’s aforementioned catastrophic track record – was pulled from that abyss by a wonderful woman he met only a couple of years prior.&#160 They celebrated their first anniversary back in August, and while it hasn’t been Easy Street&#153 for them, they’re doing better than okay.

Employment.&#160 Specifically, mine as a desktop technician, where I get to play with computers all day long – in effect, getting paid to practice my hobby.

(Thankfully, I’ve had a full-time gig since 2006, for a company known to me and only to me – since I know pussies like Cianderella Tierney, who bitched long and loud about me being a NetKKKop before having his ass exposed as a lying skank that doesn’t work at EDS, would love to find out where I work and try to get me fired…)

Okay, where was I…?

MP3s.&#160 The ability to take all my all-time favorite songs, regardless of format, and transfer them to something I can listen to in my car.&#160 Fuck you,&#160 Hilary Rosen.

Turkey.&#160 Lots of it, preferably drumsticks.

Leftovers.&#160 Turkey sammiches with lots of mustard.&#160 YEAH!

(Well, hold the bread on that.&#160 I have got to-got to-got to start paying more attention to Atkins.)

An American President who, though he is still not completely trustworthy in my eye, is at least giving the impression that he is, at least, trying – which is a damn sight better than what we could have had, hm?&#160 And at least this guy understands that the Presidency isn’t just one big frat party.&#160 (This will be crossed out at least until 2012.)

The military which he commands.&#160 Peepz, these men & women do a helluva job protecting you and yours and the freedoms you enjoy, and they do it for pretty much next-to-nothing.&#160 Next time you see one, take a moment to say, “Thank you”.&#160 (Another aside:&#160 When I first posted this, I left out one very important group of guys:&#160 the Coast Guard.&#160 Unconscionable, since one of my readers served in that very branch.&#160 Mr. Slagle, my apologies – and my thanks.)

My car:&#160 A 2007 Chevy Cobalt.&#160 Quick, cozy, and twice the gas mileage of my old truck.&#160 In this day and age, that’s important.&#160 For $10 more per month, I get all that, plus a 5/50 warranty.&#160 Good stuff, that.

A seafood restaurant chain here locally by the name of “Ole Whiskers”.&#160 Catfish, chicken, ribs, stuffed crab, onion rings, and a host of other great stuff.&#160 Catfish topped with Tabasco&#169 sauce has become a staple.

My current box – a Pentium 2.66-GHz with 2 gigs of DDR RAM.&#160 Two 21″ monitors so that I don’t have to squint anymore when I write these things.&#160 (Well, not much, anyway – at 1280×1024, things are still awfully small.)

The aforementioned crap-on-the-carpet dogs – she’s still a precious little lapdog, and she captures the heart of anyone that meets her.&#160 The aforementioned collie mix – a whirling dervish that tears everything up, but he has an infectious personality.&#160 Even my brother’s little min-pin and dachsund, Mindy & Demi respectively – two of the most affectionate dogs you’ll ever see.

Ham.&#160 Not as much as a turkey drumstick, but leftover ham does go good with eggs.

Any college football team that severely thrashes the Texas A&M Aggies.&#160 (Not anymore.&#160 Now that they’re rid of Dennis “The Mercenary” Franchione, and they’re getting their heads handed them on a weekly basis, it’s probably more appropos to pity them.) (Rescinded until such time as they prove they can beat someone without officiating help.)

Any college football team that severely thrashes Nebraska.&#160 (Not since they hired Bo Pelini, and hopefully never again.)

Any college football team that severely thrashes Miami.

Any college football team that severely thrashes Arkansas.

Any college football team that severely thrashes Texas.&#160 (Unless it’s Arkansas.)

TCU’s Horned Frogs.&#160 Your best job (again) ever this year, Gary Patterson.&#160 Even if you don’t win the BCS bowl to which the Froggies’ll get invited, you’ve established yourself as one of, if not the&#160 best coaches the program’s ever had.&#160 Do the city of Fort Worth a favor – don’t go all Franchione on us and jilt us for Bama or Notre Dame or somesuch, mkay?

Any college football team that severely thrashes SMUT.

Any college football team that severely thrashes Bastard Smurf-Turf State.&#160 (That’d be you, Boise, and until you can prove that you can win something without having to resort to “trickeration”, that’s the way it’ll stay.&#160 You potato-humping pussies are nothing bur frauds.)

Any pro football team that kicks the crap out of Donna McNabb and the Philthydelphia Beagles Warshington Foreskins – something the Cowboys did last year (twice), should have done this year in Warshington, and will do this year in Dallas.

Tony Romo.&#160 Especially if he ever wins a playoff game… (sigh)&#160 (Assuming he can come back in one piece, and can play behind something resembling an offensive line.)

MERLIN:&#160 Yeah, that line’s offensive, alright.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Hush, you.

MERLIN:&#160

Jerry Jones – for signing that extension for Romo. (grin)

Southern Baptist churches that aren’t afraid to call themselves “Baptist”. (Not since they climbed into bed with the enviro-nutjob movement.&#160 Now it’s any church that unashamedly preaches the Gospel and refuses to compromise with its enemies.)

An occasional road trip – maybe to go fishing, or even if it’s work-related.&#160 I love staying in hotels where I can crank up the AC at night, and not have to worry about the electric bill (grin).

Microsoft.&#160 No, all you morons at the federal judiciary – Bill Gates does not run a monopoly, and you damned well know it.&#160 What he does do is run an extremely successful company, one that you bastards tried to shake down for $$$$, and failed.&#160 It’s not a secret that the tech sector crashed simultaneously with Janet El Reño’s baseless attack against Microsoft.

Spanish-language television channels.&#160 You will not find a better-looking collection of major babes anywhere on Planet Earth.&#160 And they don’t mind letting people know that they’re women either, dammit.&#160 Take that, NOW.&#160 🙂

Mashed potatoes.&#160 With a ton of gravy.&#160 (Atkins be damned on this one.&#160 (grin))

Ranch-style beans™.&#160 (Well, not so much now, seeing as ConAgra Backstabbing Foods has decided to shut down the Fort Worth plant that RSB has called home forever – but it’s still a nice little bean.)

Sweet tea – even though, being a Type II diabetic, I can no longer drink the stuff (make mine Sweet ‘n Low, 3 packets per 40 ounces, please unsweetened, unless it’s peach or cranberry tea, please).

Hooters’ hot wings.&#160 Scenery’s not bad, either.&#160

Dueling-piano bars.&#160 Picture two baby-grands.&#160 Picture two players with crass senses of humor.&#160 Picture some of the raunchiest lyrics ever conceived – sometimes on the fly.&#160 Picture yourself laughing your ass off.&#160 Try it sometime.

Rush Limbaugh.&#160 Sean Hannity.&#160 Mark Levin.&#160 Glenn Beck (though Levin seems to not like him for some reason).&#160 Michael Savage.&#160 Michael Reagan – and, in case I’ve not mentioned it before…his dad, too.

Ann Coulter.&#160 Michelle Malkin.&#160 Laura Ingraham.&#160 Sigh, yowzah.&#160

The Blogosphere&#153.&#160 Specifically, Misha and Alan Henderson – for getting me into this blogging thing.

My new hairstylist.&#160 (Yeah, the old hottie got fired.)&#160 In all my lifetime, I’ve only found three people who could fully understand what I wanted done to my hair, and do it right in a minimum of time:&#160 one retired about 15 years ago.&#160 This one’s just as good as her predecessor – and she’s a major babe, too.&#160 (grin)

Broadband.&#160 Forney didn’t get it on a widespread basis – but I have Verizon FiOS Time Warner Cable AT&T U-verse now, and I rock yet again…(though, as soon as Verizon FiOS comes to Arlington… (grin))

And finally (though this list is by no means complete) – you Denizens who keep coming back to the site in hopes that I’ve updated it.&#160 Without you guys, why am I doing this?&#160 Thanks very much for being here.

And Happy Thanksgiving.&#160 Remember the Source from whom the blessings originate…

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Denizens, your first assignment while I’m on vacation is to go read this treatise.

I’m blogrolling this wonderful lady, because she says it better than either I or&#160 Misha could.

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After running the Federal deficit to unheard of levels, our President is now talking frugality and budget balancing. One sign that he is not serious is this article.

In another forum, I have suggested that the 747s be replaced with a couple Boeing Business Jets. Considering the sorry state of our elected leadership, I have begun to wonder if we shouldn’t just fly the whole bunch around in an “A” model C130, with three bladed props!

For the uninitiated, I have been told that three bladed props give a rougher ride than the four bladed variety.

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Those of you who have read me for any&#160 length of time – well, you probably knew it was coming all along, didn’t you?&#160 Especially&#160 given all the counting that’s been going on ’round these parts.&#160 But you know damned well what this is.

(Go ahead.&#160 Click it.&#160 I effin’ dare&#160 you.

And turn it up.&#160 Waaaaaay&#160 up.&#160 &#160 )

That’s right, sportz fanz:&#160 It’s the second third second vacation of the year, the annual post-L-tryptophan pilgrammage for His Rudeness&#153.&#160 And this&#160 time, said vacation is not&#160 going to be spent [un]packing & moving.

That, and lounging around on my fat ass.&#160 But you knew that already, didn’t you?&#160 But at least I’ll have time to post a bit, so I can start catching up on stuff.

Vicar, General – you guys have the conn relax for a bit.&#160 I got this.

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One.

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Two.

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When one does something new, and wants to maximize the chances of success, one smart move is always to look at how other successful people have done the same thing. In our world, the most successful people in the airport security business have long been the Israelis. To me it would have made sense, after 9/11 to have examined how the Israelis secure their airports.

Why haven’t our brilliant leaders done this?

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“So, Lord Venomous”, I (imagine I&#160 ) hear you saying, “does this mean you’re back, now that you’ve actualy thrown up a couple of non-countdown posts?”

Hmmm…&#160

“Thrown up” is such a…double entendre&#160 term…&#160

Anyway, the answer is “yes & no”.&#160 The Big Box&#153 is back online, obviously, and I’m pretty much back in business on this end.&#160 But there’s still a lot of stuff to get done, including finding a storage shed to dump about three-dozen or so boxes, hang pictures, knick-knacks & stuff – so it’s not like I have a whole lotta time to blog.

Thankfully, I have a crack blogging staff to fill in for me in my absence (hint, hint, Vicar)…

So, as always…watch this space.

Oh, and by the way…Three.

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