Posted by Darth Venomous @ 19:45
(Hat tip to the SpatulaGoddess – long may she exude, etc, etc.  )
I’m always loathe to quote Politico – but I think this is Damn Fine Stuff™ – even if it is  by Benji “Lips Firmly Planted On Obambi’s ass” Smith.
House minority leader John Boehner’s spokesman confirms the accuracy of this quote, from an Ohio student newspaper:
“Now, listen, I’ve voted ‘present’ two or three times in my entire 25-year political career, where there might have been a conflict of interest and I didn’t feel like I should vote,” Boehner said. “In Congress, we have a red button, a green button and a yellow button, alright. Green means ‘yes,’ red means ‘no,’ and yellow means you’re a chicken s***.
“And the last thing we need in the White House, in the oval office, behind that big desk, is some chicken who wants to push this yellow button.”
My only question is:  Where the Hell™ was this three months ago when we needed it?
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 17:53
Well, no, not really.  Your obdt. svt. (a little Blackie Sherrod lingo, there) was out like the proverbial light & dead to the world.  But it appears the earth did  move last night.
Two minor earthquakes shook the Dallas-Fort Worth area overnight, waking residents, setting off car alarms and spooking pets. But no major damage was reported.
The U.S. Geological Survey says a 2.5-magnitude earthquake centered in the Grand Prairie area was reported at 11:25 p.m. Thursday. A slightly stronger 3.0-magnitude quake centered in the Irving area occurred 36 minutes later.
And no, Mr. Hartung – I may have been Chick Chasing™ last night, but that doesn’t mean I caught one…
MERLIN, KORRIOTH, K’HADIBAK’H, OZY, T-BONE:
VENOMOUS:  Oh, hush, you.
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 6:46
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 17:00
While doing a little Chick Chasing™ today, I came across this.
One evening Mike went over to his friend Terry’s house to play cards with some friends. Mike sat directly across from Terry’s wife. Mike dropped a card on the floor and bent down to pick it up. When he looked across the table he saw that Terry’s wife had her legs open and no panties on. He sat up and was flushed. He went into the kitchen to get a drink of water.
To his surprise Terry’s wife had followed him into the kitchen and said, “Did you like what you saw?” Mike said “Yes I did.” She said, Well you can get more than that but it will cost you $500.”
So Mike thought about this financial situation and said, “O.K.” She said, “Come here tomorrow at 2:30 because Terry will be at work then.” Mike said, “I’ll see you then.”
The next day, Mike came over, they had sex, he paid her, then he left. Later, Terry came home and asked, “Has Mike been over here today?” She said, thinking she had been caught, “As a matter of fact, he did.”
Terry said, “Good because that fool came by my job this morning and asked to borrow $500 till this evening, and he said he would leave it with you.”
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 14:09
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 19:54
I have performed my civic duty.  I have voted.
And I have voted the straight Republican ticket, with one notable exception:  I did not cast a ballot for United States Senator.
If you will recall, I declared here that John-Boy Bailout™ had permanently lost my vote.
And you have, Cornyn, you duplicitous dickweed.  If you want to live in socialism, feel free to move to Canada.  Or Cuba.  Or Venezuela.  Or whereever.
But you see, Cor-Whore, we have a capitalistic society here, with an economic system comprised of an archaic, quaint concept called “free enterprise”.  That concept dictates that you have the opportunity to make as much money as you can doing whatever legal activity you choose – but you assume a risk that no one will want to buy what you’re selling.
In other words, Cor-Whore, there are no guarantees.  But you voted for just such a guarantee, to come out of my  pocket, and that is why you will never have my trust – or my vote – ever again.
Best of luck to the rest of the GOP ticket.  Qa’pla!
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 7:00
Guys, as we launch this edition of the Perfect Football Weekend™, I want you guys to take a look at this video:
What happened was that Singletary got in 49ers’ tight end Vernon Davis’ face during the Niners’ embarrassing 34-13 loss to the Seattle Seahawks, then wound up sending Davis to the locker room later.  “Coach Sing”, as he’s known out there, was pissed off at Davis’ seeming nonchalant attitude about the game.
Now, for decades I have hated this franchise with the purplest of passions, as evidenced by my pet name for them – the San Transexual Fairy-Whiners.
But in Singletary, I have to concede that they have one helluva  coach.  And by Cthulu’s left nut, I wish Jerry Jones had hired him.
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 21:15
North Korea threatened Tuesday to turn South Korea into “debris” in an unusually strong statement that demanded Seoul halt what the communist state called its policy of confrontation.
It was issued amid worsening relations between the Koreas, with the North angry about anti-Pyongyang leaflets floated across the border by activists and defector groups based in the South.
That’s really all we need RightAboutNow™.  Wars going on in two theatres, a pansy-assed Communist limp-wrist on the cusp of
illegally occupying the White House (which may or may not bring yet another war in yet another theatre), and now N.Korea’s on the verge of forcing NATO’s hand.
And does anyone want to start a pool on China moving on Taiwan shortly thereafter?
“The puppet authorities (Seoul) had better bear in mind that the advanced pre-emptive strike of our own style will reduce everything… to debris, not just setting them on fire,” the North’s military said.
“It will turn out to be a just war… to build an independent reunified state on it,” it added in a statement carried by the state news agency.
Translation:  “We’re going to bomb the shit out of Seoul, and you’re just going to watch, American dogs, and not do a fucking  thing about it.”
And, given who’s about to occupy the White House, it’s a safe bet that they’re bang-on.  The Manchurian Muslim™ is probably creaming his jeans with that needle-dick of his over it this very minute.
And a large number of you couldn’t care less, because you jutht hate Boooothh.  Don’t you?  I mean, it doesn’t matter to any of you Oprah-worshippers out there that a potential world war is about to be starting halfway across the globe, and you imbeciles want that jug-eared, dickless wonder at the helm of State instead of a former military man – no, that doesn’t matter, ’cause Lindsay Lohan and America Ferrera are having a catfight!!!11!1!!ONE!!1
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 19:33
Just as her career was getting back on track, Lindsay Lohan suffered two setbacks. The actress’ guest role on “Ugly Betty” was cut short reportedly due to conflicts with series star America Ferrera. Lohan was also sued by three men for the wild car chase that led to her arrest in 2007.
What you sow, Lohan, what you sow…
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 7:00
I was wrong about the Frog defense outscoring the Wyoming offense.  They didn’t.
But the special teams did.
Arlington Heights 63, South Hills 13
at #15 Texas Christian 54, Wyoming 7
#4 Oklahoma 58, at Kansas State 35
at Nebraska 32, Baylor 20
at Dallas 13, Tampa Bay 9
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 11:42
A black-robed, tyrannical, Obabmi-dick-sucking sycophant bench-jockey has thrown out a challenge to B. HUSSEIN!!!  Obambi’s supposed US citizenship.  A challenge, it’s worth noting, Obambi allowed to stand by refusing to answer it.
Surrick ruled that Berg lacked standing to bring the case, saying any harm from an allegedly ineligible candidate was “too vague and its effects too attenuated to confer standing on any and all voters.”
Hmmm.  Guess the tinhorn must have adjudged an individual citizen of the United States of America to be a “legal fiction”.
Funny that liberal groups like PETA, ACLU, LULAC, NAACP, etc, never seem to have thie problem.  Only conservatives & conservative groups.
The Tree of Liberty™ is getting awfully damned dry…
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 21:45
Item:  Last week, our beloved (?) county hospital, a ragtag Mickey-Mouse outfit known as Parkland Memorial, charged a young lady nursing a broken leg $162 dollars for an emergency room visit.
What did that $162 get her?  About five minutes’ worth of triage.
Oh, and about 19 hours of waiting in emergency room chairs.
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 8:00
Malkin is reporting that the NY Slimes  is standing on the precipice of junk-bond territory:
Moody’s Investors Service said on Thursday it may cut its ratings on New York Times Co into junk territory, citing concerns about continuing revenue declines and risks associated with refinancing its debt.
Moody’s said it may cut the New York Times from “Baa3,” the lowest investment grade. Downgrades into junk territory can significantly increase a company’s borrowing costs.
To borrow a phrase from the Rev’r’nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd Jackass-i-miah Wrong – looks like Pinch’s chickens have come home to roost.
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 21:59
Posted by Darth Venomous @ 7:30
We’ll start off this week’s edition of the Perfect Football Weekend™ with a WITY™ (What’d I Tell You?) of sorts.
Remember a couple weeks ago, I was lambasting the Cowgirls for playing excuse-me football – and I quote:
Instead, once again you’ve played down to the level of the opposition, and lost a game you should have won because of it.  Once again you’ve played your little soft zone like Coach Cupcake wants you to play, and once again little Janie Campbell got to play tea-party with his boyfriends.  Once again you failed to hit  anyone – “Excuse me, Miss Portis, ma’am, may I tackle you now?” – when you could’ve  laid some wood on some people and put the Fear Of Gawd™ in them…and once again, it’s cost you dearly.
Well, now I’m getting backed up on my assessment of the C’girls – and from a couple of experts, no less:  Phil Simms & Bill Cowher.