Welcome to the Realm™ - Version 5.0...

(SCENE:  Aboard the Klingon Bird-of-Prey Pegasus.   The ship has just exited its sixth wormhole of the past 90 minutes after yet another failed attempt to go to warp…and none too smoothly, either.  Chief Engineer & Magician Merlin picks himself up off the deck again.)

MERLIN:  Dammit, I’m gonna catch Hell™ for that  jolt…

(as if on cue) LSIK&T(on speakers):  Merlin, would you mind coming up to the bridge, please, sir?

(Merlin warily eyes the rest of the engineering crew warily.  Lord Spatula’s tone-of-voice sounded way  too cordial for his comfort.)

MERLIN:  Uhhh…aye, sir? (trudges toward the bridge)

(SCENE:  On the bridge of Pegasus.   The doors part and Merlin comes to stand to the right of Lord Spatula’s command chair.  Tactical officer Korrioth, the Klingon-Vulcan hybrid, stands behind Spats’ right shoulder, directly to Merlin’s left.)

MERLIN:  Reporting as ordered, m’Lord…?

LSIK&T:  (pleasantly) Mr. Korrioth…?


(Korrioth delivers a wicked backhand to the side of Merlin’s head.  Merlin literally flies across the bridge, coming to rest in a crumpled heap in the forward section thereof.  Lord Spatula comes to stand over him.)

LSIK&T:  I trust I’ve made my point, Wizard…?

MERLIN:  (groggily) Aye, m’Lord.  I’ll…get it right…unnnh…this time…ow…

LSIK&T:  Mr. Korrioth, will you please carry Merlin back to Engineering, place him gently in his chair and double-check whatever calculations he comes up with?

KORRIOTH:  (grunt)

LSIK&T:  Thank you, gentlemen.

(SCENE:  Six hours later.)

KORRIOTH:  Bridge, this is Korrioth.  Try it now, m’Lord.

LSIK&T:  There’s a Cluebat™ with your name on it if it’s wrong, Korrioth…!!!

KORRIOTH:  All simulations test positive, m’Lord.  We have the proper formula balance now.  We may proceed at warp nine, if you wish.

LSIK&T:  I’ll hold you to that, targ-breath.  (to the helm) Mr. K’hadibak’h, if you please?  Warp…(glances back behind him, as if towards Engineering)…one.

(Pegasus  shoots into warp one more time…)

Okay, guys, I’ve tweaked the formatting of the blogroll and the email advisory to my liking; now I think we’re ready to go (he said as he tapped a neutronium ClueBat™ in his hand).  Now that the main page looks the way I want it to look, I can start installing some scripts.

Bear with me and keep your fingers crossed… (sigh)


Glossary -  Disclaimer - Privacy Policy - History - The SpatulaFAQ
This blog is best viewed with your eyes. 
It helps, though, if you have Microsoft Internet Explorer  set about 1024x768 1280x1024 with your Favorites window activated on the left deactivated.  (At least until I can get a better handle on how WordPress works.)

(KORRIOTH:  Oh, great.  More wormholes.)

Mozilla Firefox doesn't do too badly, either; in fact, it's His Rudeness' browser of choice.
You can  use Nutscrape,  if you so desire - but why in blazes would you want to use a browser from a company that had to hide behind Janet El Reño's skirt to be successful?

And don't even  get me started on Opera or Chrome.  I'm not about  to trust any browser that won't let me change its color scheme.
Spatula City BBS! was based on WordPress platform 2.6 (it's 3.05 3.31 now), RSS tech , RSS comments design by Gx3.