Local time where you're at. ("Where you're at"?)

I have one question after yesterday:&#160 Why is Tom Brady still ambulatory today?

Arlington Heights 7, at South Hills 14
Texas Christian 38, at Stanford 36
at UBuffalo 43, Toledo 33
at #6 Oklahoma 41, #11 Missouri 31
#1 LSU 37, at #17 Kentucky 15, Motherfucking Blind-Assed Biased Pro-Kentucky Excuse-For-An-Officiating-Crew 28
at Dallas 27, New England 14, Pansy-asses’ In-Our-Back-Pocket Blind-Assed Zebras 34

Defense ruled the day in Fort Worth as Arlington Heights could only manage 139 yards (101 passing) and South Hills could only go for 121.

Heights gave the game away, though, as the deciding points came on a 65-yard fumble recovery by the Scorpions.

…

Somebody forgot to tell the Toledo & UBuffalo defenses that the game had already started.&#160 The Zips & the Bulls combined for 38 points in the first quarter alone, and 55 points for the first half.

James Starks had 231 yards and three touchdowns for the Bulls, who are now 3-1 in Mid-American Conference play.

…

Something happened on the way to yet another loss for the Texas Christian Horned Frogs Saturday:&#160 They found their offense.

Andy Dalton completed 23 of 34 for 344 yards and two touchdowns as the Frogs scored 21 second-half points to overcome a four-point halftime deficit.

Even at that, TCU nearly gave the game away in the fourth quarter – after Aaron Brown scored a touchdown with 4:13 left, sophomore kickoff specialist Drew Combs squibbed one only about 20 yards or so, giving the Cardinal incredible field position.&#160 Only a Robert Henson bat-down of a Travis Pritchard pass from the TCU 18 saved the day for the Tadpoles.

…

After a quick Mizzou touchdown to start the game, Oklahoma then scored 23 of the next 26 points to take a 23-10 lead.&#160 Sam Bradford built on his TU performance in throwing TD passes to Enrique Iglesias and Jermaine Gresham.&#160 The Tigers would roar back…

KORRIOTH, OZY, MERLIN, T-BONE:&#160 CORRRRRRRRRR-NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

LSIK&T:&#160 Shut up.

…to take a brief one-point lead, at which point reserve RB Chris Brown would score the second of his three touchdowns to lift OU to a 29-24 lead.

It was at this point that the game turned.&#160 Mizzou QB Chase Daniel took a shotgun snap, then attempted a forward hand off to tailback Jeremy Maclin, who was expecting Daniel to pull the ball back.&#160 Curtis Loftin returned the fumble 12 yards for the score and OU never looked back.

…

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again now, and I’ll say it forevermore:&#160 Eleven-on-eighteen is not a fair fight.&#160 Especially when, as was the case in Ken-Fucky, seven of the eighteen carry whistles & flags.

Bottom-fucking-line:&#160 The God-forsaken excuse-for-an-officiating crew, led by a buffoon who I swear is Oliver Willis’ twin brother, fucking gave&#160 this game to the Wildcats.&#160 LSU had no business losing this game, and I promise you, Denizens, they wouldn’t have had the game been called evenly & fairly.

LSU couldn’t so much as breathe&#160 on anyone wearing The Ugliest Blue Uniforms In The World™ without drawing a flag – usually for pass interference.&#160 So help me God, the motherfucking zebras were directly responsible for sustaining no fewer than four (4) drives that led to touchdowns, by calling penalties that were too damned timely to be a coincidence.

HOWEVER!!!, Ken-Fucky players could lead with their helmets on blocks (in one case knocking Tiger linebacker Craig Steltz out of the game and causing him a pretty good gash), push Tiger linemen back with hands to the face (a sure 15-yard penalty in the pros), without so much as a raised eyebrow from this sorry-assed crew.

A sample:

First quarter:&#160 LSU penalty for offsides puts the Pussies at 1st & 5 at the LSU 20; they pick up the first down and go on to score.

Second quarter:&#160 Offensive pass interference called on receiver Terrance Toliver (it wasn’t); then a 10-yard illegal block penalty on Brandon LaFell (again, it wasn’t) cost the Tigers 4 points as they were forced to kick a field goal.

Third quarter:&#160 LSU called for offsides (they weren’t) on 1st & 10 at the LSU 15; the Pussies would go on to score another touchdown.

Fourth quarter:&#160 Consecutive so-called pass-interference penalties on LSU (one was offset by a holding penalty, which LSU could have used at that point) led to a Ken-Fucky field goal.&#160 After tying the game, a so-called holding penalty on the subsequent kickoff pushed the Tigers back 10 yards.&#160 Colt David’s 57-yard attempt hooked slightly left at the end; a 47-yarder would have been good.

On the Pussies’ last drive in overtime, LSU held on a third-down play – but got called for defensive holding, giving Ken-Fucky a first-and-goal inside the 5.&#160 The bastard zebras even tried to give the Pussies a phantom touchdown on the very next play.

Now, I will grant you that Matt Flynn didn’t have his best game, nor did they have Early Doucet save for a couple of plays in overtime.&#160 But there is No Way In Hell™ that the Kin-Fucking Pussies are better than the LSU Tigers.

And a cleanly-called game would have borne that out.&#160 Bank on that.

…

In like fashion, the New England Pansy-asses got their usual dick-sucking from the bozos in the striped shirts against the Cowboys.

2nd quarter:&#160 A so-called holding penalty on OL Kyle Kosier cost the Cowboys 5 yards.&#160 On 4th and four, Nick Folk is forced to kick a field goal.

Subsequently, on 3rd and 3 from the Pansy 35, Dallas DL Stephen Bowen is called for offsides.&#160 Five yard penalty, first down Pansies.

What happened is that Bowen jumped into the neutral zone, then jumped back.&#160 Immediately, Pansy OT Matilda Light stands up and takes a swipe at Bowen.

Deliberately.

With any other team, that’s called a false start.&#160 Not so the New England Pissants.

During the two-minute drill, Owens gets forced out of bounds on a reception.&#160 Replay calls him out-of-bounds, no catch.&#160 Any other team the Cowboys are playing, that gets called.&#160 Instead, the half-assed officiating just yawns, go run the next play, we don’t care what you think, we want the Pansy-asses to win.

Third quarter:&#160 Moss runs directly into Patrick Watkins on a slant route.&#160 Watkins is obviously there first, and it should&#160 have been pass interference on Moss.&#160 Watkins is the one who gets flagged.

Fourth quarter:&#160 Barber picks up a fourth-and-one at midfield with the Cowboys down seven.&#160 Oops – “holding”, Dallas (it wasn’t).&#160 Cowboys punt – the Pansies go down and score.&#160 Ball game.

Fourth quarter, Dallas still trying to come back:&#160 Corner route in the end zone to Hurd.&#160 Hurd’s pushed by Hobbs of the Pansies.&#160 Illegal contact at the very least&#160 – no call.

You get the idea.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again:&#160 The New England Pussies cannot win shit&#160 without help.&#160 They’re nothing but fucking cheaters.

And then in the last minute of the game, instead of taking a knee, that son-of-a-bitch Tom Brady keeps pounding the ball in until they score their 48th point.&#160 Lemme tell you something – Billie-boy Belicheat is damned lucky Wade Phillips has enough class not to go for Brady’s knees at that point.&#160 Had I been the Cowboy head coach, you Pansy fans wouldn’t have your quarterback today.

This week:&#160 3-3.&#160 Overall:&#160 30-10.

The PFW returns on Thursday, as the Froggies will get an early jump on things.&#160 In the meantime, I imagine the Humble DevilDog is nearly suicidal at this point, Bucky having lost two straight…

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One response to “PFW:&#160 The old saw about eleven-on-eighteen”

1. Robert Huntingdon says:

   October 17, 2007 at 2:49 am

   I miss getting this over at the Rott. What happen, did chicken little Alwhine kick you out? I really don’t know why the Emperor keeps him around. The site is still slow, granted it looks cool (most of the time) but putting up with an arrogant idiot like that is just not worth it in my book. I’ve taken to not even bothering to read his idiotic replies, because I’m tired of listening to an idiot so retarded that he actually thinks steaming piles of horse dung are caviar and fine wine.

   Anyway, on to football… or 11-17/18/whatever the heck it is. Again, the bungles lose a game to the zebras and I’m quite tired of it. Granted the bungles didn’t play very well but they had a promising drive killed by a BLATANTLY bad call in the 3rd that gave the KC Chicks an extra TD they shouldn’t have had… had the Bungles kept the ball (as they should have on the OBVIOUSLY completed pass) then at the very least they would have punted from a better spot and buried KC deep in their own territory, but I expect that drive could very likely have given the Bungles’ a TD instead, which would have made it 17-20 midway through the third and all of a sudden we have a ballgame again. At the very least it should have still been 10-20 with the Chicks deep in their territory instead of on the wrong side of the 50. Dunno if you got to watch the “failed” challenge by Marvin on the play, but I was screaming at the TV after that pile of steaming horse dung. GRRRR.

   For the first time in the season I’m able to watch my Saints play a decent game… and miracle of miracles it’s actually a game of 11-on-11 for once as well. Maybe the Seattle Zebras decided to repent of their blatant bad calls a few weeks back against the Bungles? Or maybe their contact orders came in in the meantime? Either way, it was fun to watch. I wasn’t at home for the start but I’ve watched the punt replay now something like 30 times… 🙂 I actually came home early in the second quarter and said “well I guess I’ll see how bad my Saints are losing”… whoops! They were already up 14-0 and about to block that FG… man that was a nice surprise.

   Man you gotta feel sorry for the Bears when even the Viqueens can beat you… NOT! Hah that was a fun thing to watch. Last year the Seahawks managed to break a fairly long streak of the SB loser missing the playoffs the next year… may the curse return this year! 🙂

   Well while I’m posting a book why not give you my PFW predictions for next week…

   Widdle Tommy Bwady will throw a few more TDs and Miami will remain winless and hopeless. At least I’ve got the skank on my fantasy team, if I have to watch the nauseating display at least I can win some fantasy games off him (I’m 6-0 so far).

   Finally the Bungles face a run defense that makes their own look halfway competent. And with the (long overdue) return of another couple of linebackers “Chinny” and Geathers may be able to move back to their real positions… baring further injuries things finally may be able to turn around a bit. Maybe. Of course the burning question is whether the Cinti zebras got their contacts in the mail yet. But if so, I’m expecting the Bungles can at least get this losing streak snapped and maybe have some mild hope of turning things around. The Jets make people wonder if it really was the zebras all along as they make the Bungles look like a real team for the first time since opening night: Bengals 35, Jets 16.

   Shaun Alexander discovers that there is indeed life after Mack Strong and runs wild in St. Louis. As long as he gives me a few fantasy points this week I’m not too worried about whether the Hawks win or not, but in what pipe dream could they not?
   The Saints get to play at home against a team that is one or two more bad games from complete meltdown. Widdle whiny Joe Horny comes back to town, his hammy behaving itself (for now), odds are 6-5 and pick ’em whether he will last the night, if it isn’t retweaking his hammy his pinky will get bruised… or something. Either that or he will seduce a teammate’s wife during the week and show up with a black eye (or worse) and play even worse than normal (if he’s able to play at all). Somebody will keep it from being a shutout by scoring either early or late, but the Saints D finally realized that they do know how to play football after all last weekend and they aren’t interested in forgetting how this week, they will have more trouble finding ways to NOT make it through the Atwaahnta O-Line than the other way around. Plus the Bumpkineers and Punkthers need to be caught up with, and Atwaahnta is in the way. Too bad for Atwaahnta. Saints 42, Atlanta 7.

   The Evil Pitsfart Stoolers will face a team that is in free fall, but retains a significant degree of talent as well. They still should win, but I will be cheering for the Broncos anyway. Just in case.

   Buttimore gets to face a team that knows how to play Defense too, and similarly doesn’t have much of an offense. In a snoozefest the Mavens barely avoid getting shut out when their defense scores their only points of the game: Bills 10, Ravens 7.

   Oh and yes I’ll be nice and cheer for Dallas this weekend. I’ve got Crayton on my fantasy team. But I’d like to see a Dallas-NO NFC championship so I need your boys to win a few more games…

   RH