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Denizens, as we kick off…

[Venomous immediately snaps around to glare at Korrioth, Merlin, Ozy, K’hadibak’h and McManx – who have all taken the hint.]

…this edition of the Perfect Football Weekend&#153, we note with more than a little bit of trepidation that Adam “Pacman” Jones has once again been involved in a little dustup.

Dallas Cowboys cornerback Adam Jones got into an altercation with one of his security guards at the Joule Hotel in downtown Dallas on Wednesday morning, according to Dallas Deputy Chief Vince Golbeck, who is a commander of the central patrol division.

Now, WFAA/Channel 8 is reporting that no one deigned to press any charges, so this might&#160 go away.

MERLIN:&#160 And you’ve got the body of a Greek god.&#160 (snort)

VENOMOUS:&#160 Well, I do&#160 have the body of a god, y’know.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Yeah.&#160 Buddha.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Damn straight.

ALL:&#160

This wouldn’t have anyone on pins & needles regarding the C’boy secondary…except Terrence Newman is now out with a sports hernia.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Ohhhhhh shit.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Tell me about it.

Hmmm.&#160 Wonder where Quincy “Toast” Butler is RightAboutNow&#153…

On to the PFW.&#160 My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets get to play the North Side Steers tomorrow night.&#160 To give you an idea about the Steers…everyone, and I mean everyone, schedules North Side for Homecoming.

Now, Heights isn’t gonna have Homecoming on a Thursday – but you get the idea.&#160 This one will not be close.&#160 In fact, I am proclaiming a Guaranteed Win Night&#153 for Heights, whereupon I will be sorely pissed if the final margin ain’t at least 30.

Saturday, Gary Patterson’s Texas Christian Horned Frogs invade Colorado Springs Fort Collins, Colorado, for a tilt with the Colorado State Rams.&#160 ‘Sfunny – I always predict a CState win, and TCU always routs ’em.

Oh, well.&#160 Why not stick with a good thing?&#160 Gimme TCU and 18,000 points.&#160

Turner Gill’s UBuffalo Bulls are 1&#189-point favorites at home against Western Michigan, which means per the SpatulaLine&#153, any thing under a nine-point loss counts.&#160 But I think I like UB in this one.

Things don’t get any easier for the Nebraska Cornhuskers this weekend, as they have to travel to Lubbock to face seventh-ranked Texas Tech.&#160 Tech is a 20-point favorite, 21 if they have their own refs there, 30, if they also supply their own replay officials.

Sunday, the aforementioned C’boys are playing Dallas West, aka the Arizona Cardinals.&#160 The “Dallas West” refernce comes from the fact that, whenever the ‘Boys play in Arizona, they usually have more fans there than the Cards.&#160 Be interesting to see if that happens again.

But the marquee matchup of the weekend is in Dallas on Saturday at the Cotton Bowl, as Bob Stoopes’ top-ranked Oklahoma takes on fifth-ranked TU in the Red River Rivalry Shootout&#153

There.&#160 I said it.&#160 You PC-types can bite me.

The Shortdicks supposedly have a defense this year, but Sam Bradford’s still tearing everything & everyone up, so I expect the same thing to happen here, but we’ll see.

We’re back Monday for the recap.&#160 In the meantime, Bucky’s a 5&#189-point home dog to JoePa and Penn State and I have to ask HDD – is this Paterno’s last year?

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2 responses to “PFW:&#160 Guaranteed Win Night&#153”

1. HDD says:

   October 9, 2008 at 4:30 pm

   Who knows? Not even JoePa knows.

   Joe Paterno is that rare coach who has earned the right to retire any damn time he feels like it, and there’s nothing his employer can really say about it. If JoePa wants to keep coaching for the next 20 years, and get 2 wins in those 20 years, Penn State will let him. Why? Because he’s earned it. He’s the ONLY head coach they’ve had for going on 4 DECADES now, and has more wins with one school than any other coach. By a lot. He’s also in a “Which week is it?” race with Bobby Bowden, of Florida State, for most wins in Division 1-A football. Along the way, he’s managed to have about 5 losing seasons, and a metric butt ton of winning seasons, including several undefeated seasons, and a national championship or two. He’s also done all of this with class and composure…except when he has to talk to a reporter (which, fortunately for us, is quite often). While I’m not a Nittany Lions fan (don’t hate them, like I do the other Big Ten schools. I’m just not a fan), I do like JoePa, and really hope that he keeps coaching until it is no longer fun.

   All that being said, I’ll take the Nittany Lions, and you can have the points. Bucky has looked HORRID against two teams that aren’t half as good as Penn State looks, and I don’t care that it’s at Camp Randall. This game won’t be close.

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2. David Hartung says:

   October 11, 2008 at 10:22 pm

   I grew up 15 miles east of Madison Wisconsin. My wife is from the Pittsburgh area, and is a life long Penn State fan.

   It is a real good thing that I don’t get exited over football, else I would be real depressed right about now!

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