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Denizens, we’ll start this edition of the Perfect Football Weekend&#153 by talking about a couple of big free-agent signings.

First off, as you all know, Widdle Mikey “Dog Fight Club” Vick signed last week with the Phuckadelphia Beagles.

Oh, my.&#160 Did I really say that out loud?&#160

Now, ’tis true that Vickie is one hellacious athletic talent.&#160 And it’s no secret that The World’s Greatest Ever Quarterback In The History Of Ever, Ever&#153, Donna McCrabbs, is entrenched as the quarterback in Philthy.&#160 Therefore, it is safe to assume that Vickie will get a lot of playing time at back or receiver (or maybe both) – and the Beagles will be that much more dangerous offensively because of it.

However, as the C’boys proved for the last three years, signing an immense talent possessing a certain notoriety doesn’t always bode well for the signing team.&#160 (Widdle Terri Owens, call your office.)&#160 If Vickie isn’t free of the character flaws he possesses, he could turn out to be a locker-room cancer, and bring the Beagles down from within.

Which would please me no end.

As for the other&#160 free-agent signing…raise your hand if you didn’t see this coming.

(crickets)

Yeah, I didn’t think so.

For the Uninitiated&#153, Brett Favre was forced out of retired from the Green Bay Packers at the end of the 2007 season, then – after a major assload of “will he or won’t he” drama – came back and played one semi-forgettable season with the New York J-E-T-S-JetsJetsJets!!!, then retired again.

Or so we thought.

For the last six months or so, Favre has been teasing us with more “will he or won’t he”.&#160 He was talking with the ViQueens – no, he wasn’t&#160 talking with ’em.&#160 He was at the Minne-haha facility to get a physical – no, he wasn’t.&#160 He was definitely coming back – well, maybe not.&#160 Until this past week, when he threw all pretense to the wind and signed with the ViQueens.&#160 Which just goes to show – Brett Favre is an attention whore who can’t stand to be out of the spotlight.

As for how Minne-haha will do this year – Favre may win two or three games for them.&#160 But he’ll lose twice that many, and the ViQueens will realize that they’ve gotten hosed again.

On to the PFW.&#160 It sucks not having NFL Network any longer, since I can’t see as many games as I’d like.&#160 But if I catch any on ESPN or so, I’ll chronicle them here.

In the meantime, the C’boys cut the football ribbon on their new billion-dollar Jones Mahal when the Tennessee Titans come calling.&#160 As was the case last week, the starters will play about a quarter or so, then the Titans’ backups will demolish ours, since Jerrah Jones (aka Owner Jethro – thanks again, Gil LeBreton of the Fort Worth Startlegram) still can’t draft worth a shit.

We’re back Monday for the recap.&#160 In the meantime…is there any news from Buckyville, HDD?

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2 responses to “PFW:&#160 Signings”

1. HDD says:

   August 22, 2009 at 5:25 am

   I haven’t been paying as much attention to the news out of Camp Randall, because, frankly, it’s really hard to do it from the other side of the country. Coach Bielema has had the program on a definite trend, though…down. His defenses are soft, his offenses can’t move the ball against air, and his special teams never take the field, because of the first two problems. But, I suffered through worse before the arrival of Barry Alvarez, so, I’m going to suffer through this era, as well. I just wonder how long Barry can watch the team he built over all those years under-perform as badly as it has, before he pulls the trigger and finds a new coach.

   Brett ain’t gonna lose 6 games for the Viqueens this year. Someone will ‘retire’ him long before he has the chance to even play 6 games. He’s playing on borrowed time.

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2. Alan K. Henderson says:

   August 22, 2009 at 1:39 pm

   Drop by the blog today – I have a post about the Jerrytron’s punt interference.

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