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Denizens, the Christmas edition of the Perfect Football Weekend&#153…kicks off…

CREW:&#160 CORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR-NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

VENOMOUS:&#160 Merry Christmas, guys.

MERLIN:&#160 And the merriest of Christmases to you as well, m’liege.

KORRIOTH, K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 QISmaS DatIvjaj ‘ej DIS chu’ DatIvjaj.

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Nollaig shona duit.

T-BONE MCMANX:&#160 Bliain úr faoi shéan is faoi mhaise duit.

…kicks off with yet another story about everyone’s favorite Widdle Terri Owens-wannabe, DeShawna Jackoff.

Seems the little needle-dick pulled another showboating act during the game with the NY Football Douchebags, where the D-bags suffered a total collapse, losing the game on the very last play.

That play, as you all know, was a punt that coach Tommy-boy Coughlin told his punter to kick out of bounds, but saw him kick it to Jackoff anyway.&#160 Whereupon Jackoff muffed the punt, then picked it up and raced to the goal line.

At this point, it gets interesting.&#160 What you saw on your TV screens was Jackoff taunting the D-bags by running parallel to the goal line for about 25 yards before scoring.

What you didn’t&#160 see…was here.

DeSean Jackson’s goal-line grandstanding could have caused his miraculous game-winning punt return to be wiped out, a review of FOX replays show.

As the Philadelphia Eagles return man was running parallel to the end zone, delaying his touchdown for maximum showboating effectiveness, a number of his teammates ran onto the field from the sideline, a clear violation of the NFL’s “too many men on the field” rules.

The new wrinkle on Jackson’s return was first noticed at BallHyped.com. Because he took a turn at the 6-yard line instead of running into the end zone, a number of his teammates and some coaches spilled out onto the field in anticipation of his touchdown, which didn’t come until a few seconds later. A flag could have been thrown, bringing back the touchdown and sending the game to overtime.

Which, of course, it wasn’t.&#160 The zebras could have…and should have…called it.&#160 But…just as we saw with the aforementioned Widdle Terri Owens, his then-quarterback Donna McCrabbs and the now-infamous Roy Williams Rule, the league protected its butt-buddy honeyboys in Pussydelphia and looked the other way.

Which is to say that the Beagles are just like their NFL counterparts, the New England Pansy-asses, and the Smurf Turf Fucknozzle State Bronc-ettes…they can’t win playing straight-up football.&#160 They have to have help.

Of course, none of this would have happened if the C’girlz had had any testicular fortitude and taken out little Ms. Jackoff at the knees two weeks ago.

Speaking of the C’girlz, tonight we have them traveling out to the Arizona desert to take on the Phoenix Cardinals.&#160 Phoenix is starting a rookie quarterback, and their defense hasn’t stopped anyone this year – but they still have Larry Fitzgerald at receiver, and the C’girlz have a wire-strainer defense…it lets everything&#160 through.&#160 Cardinals in an easy win.

We’re back Sunday for the recap, then we’ll have the Bowl Edition&#153 next week.&#160 Keep it here.

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