[SCENE: On the bridge of ISS Titanic. The ship has just returned to Realm spacedock after a successful month-long shakedown cruise to test the new warp core. Chief Engineer Ozymandias McCool is beaming with pride at the rave review being given to him by Admiral Darth Venomous.]
VENOMOUS: …we even got to test the upgraded particle disruptors, and for once, we made it through a successful mission without something or other blowing up. I think you’ve earned that promotion back to Lieutenant Commander, Ozy, and it pleases me to so bestow you now…
OZY MCCOOL: Thank you, Admiral.
VENOMOUS: …and Wizard, if you want to embark on that vacation I’ve been promising you, I’ve taken the liberty of making a reservation for you on Risa.
MERLIN: Thank you, m’liege. At my age, it is sorely needed. No pun intended, of course.
VENOMOUS: Just one condition, my friend: Under no circumstance are you to bring me a horga’hn – Mrs. Venomous would have what’s left of my skillet-battered head.
ALL: BWAH-HAHAHAHA…!!!
[The laughter is rudely interrupted by a massive rocking of Titanic and a simultaneous power failure. The senior staff, including Venomous, are thrown about the bridge. The automatic red-alert klaxons begin blaring.]
VENOMOUS (shouting at the nearest intercom): Bridge to Engineering, report!!!
OFFSTAGE VOICE (over speaker): 1100 1001 1111 0000 1ac420dfee 1010 0101 ac2df19e…
[Even Venomous raises an eyebrow at that. He's never heard a Bynar use hexidecimal before.]
VENOMOUS: Ozy, what the hell was he saying?!?!
[Ozy's face is as white as a sheet.]
OZY MCCOOL: There’s been an explosion in Engineering and they’re losing containment! He’s estimating 10 minutes to a warp core breach!!!
VENOMOUS: Oh, shit, not again. Awright, guys, secure all stations and let’s get out of here! T-Bone, get on it.
T-BONE MCMANX: Aye, sir! [He touches some controls and leans toward the pickup.] All hands abandon ship! Repeat, all hands abandon ship. This is not a drill. I repeat, all hands abandon ship…
VENOMOUS (muttering to himself): Just once could I get some writers whose effing solution to everything wasn’t to blow up the damned ship…?!??!?!?!?!
—
Working through some issues here, Denizens. Will try to post as time allows. (It’s nothing serious, no worries – just a bleeping annoyance.)
2 Comments to “Death of the ISS Titanic, part the oneth.”
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You need to login, m'liege.







It seems every time you try to upgrade, SHTF.
Might want to start building your own boxes.
My big problem is upgrading a box that: 1) has no business being upgraded (i.e. it’s really too old to upgrade), and 2) really needed other parts upgraded first a long time ago.
And I’ll let it go at that for now. Don’t wanna give away too much of the story.