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Denizens, I may be somewhat on the quiet side for a few days.

I have a friend on Facebook – the other&#160 aspect thereof which the Vicar referenced the other day – whom, after the Dallas Mavericks won the NBA Championship, was ripping former owner Donald Carter for committing the allegedly cardinal sin of standing up there on the podium (at Mark Cuban’s invitation) and accepting the trophy from NBA commish David Stern.

(Apparently, my friend had it in for Mr. Carter all these years for the alleged reason he sold the Mavs to H. Ross Pee-rot, Junior.)

Now, my friend posted these thoughts on FB, in full view of God ‘n Ever’body&#153.&#160 I thought it a very classless thing to do (still do), and gave serious consideration to publicly challenging him on it, unfriending him and telling his ass off before the whole world – both on FB, and here.

As you probably know by now, I wound up doing none of those things.&#160 For once, I held my notoriously acidic tongue.&#160 About the only thing I did was withhold birthday wishes from him last week.

I just found out, a few minutes ago, that my friend died two hours ago of a heart attack.&#160 And it has hit me with all the force of a ten-ton wrecking ball at full speed.

Right now, I don’t have words.&#160 I am, for one of the few times in my life, utterly speechless.&#160 And in the silence, I’m thinking hard about a few things.

Including this blog.

It’s time for some re-evaluations around here.&#160 Vicar, General – you guys have the conn.

UPDATE:&#160 Obviously, I’d not read the General’s own pullback announcement (the gravity of this post will prevent me from making the obvious smartassed remark about it).

General, just do what you can.&#160 Vicar – a sermon outline or two would come in handy at the moment.

Denizens, I want y’all to look at this:

Now, apparently, Bea Arthur’s character is suffering from what they call “chronic fatigue syndrome” (something from which the show’s creator, Susan Harris, apparently suffers) – essentially, she’s got a virus, but that’s not dramatic enough, so let’s give it an ominous-sounding name, mkay? – and her doctor is apparently not bending over backwards to make her feel like a po’ widdle pwincess.

So “Dorothy” gives her ex-doc a sanctimonious, self-righteous tongue-lashing in a public place.&#160 Which gets a major response from what is likely a leftard excuse-for-an-audience.

She then goes over and watches mutely (albeit with a shocked, SHOCKED&#160 expression on her face) as Estelle Getty’s character essentially pulls a con on the restaurant manager to get a free, high-class meal.&#160 Again, to the delirious approval of the audience.

So, essentially, Susan Harris is lampooning about the (lack of) morality of an allegedly-uncaring doctor…then demonstrating her own lack of morality by having her characters con an expensive restaurant (and apparently giving her approval over it).

And the audience just laps it up.

And then we all wonder why this country’s going to hell in a handbasket.

No, I didn’t watch the debate last night – I have better things to do with my time.

Like, say, watching grass grow.

But I’m reading this recap of the thing, and I’m thinking…we as a country are over $14 extra-ginormous-large (that’s “trillion” for you douchebags in the Church of the SubTarded) in debt; our economy is on the verge of complete collapse; we’re seeing, right before our very eyes, the beginnings of civil unrest; we have people entrusted to be our voice in Washington who would rather show their junk to 17-year-old girls while their wives are elsewhere – and we’re asking our presidential candidates whether they prefer deep dish or thin crust?!?!?

UPDATE: I forgot to add what may be the most important point. I had been considering tossing my support to Herman Cain after the first debate, but I have to completely abandon him after he answered the key question of the evening by saying he endorses Chicago style deep dish pizza over the New York, thin crust variety. Too bad, Herman. You were looking pretty good up until then.

Great.&#160 Honkin’.&#160 Cthulu.&#160

(Hat tip to a lotta peoplez on this one – the bile needs to be spread around a bit.)

This abso-friggin’-lutely makes me sick.

A key senator has asked the Social Security Administration to investigate how people who live their lives role-playing as “adult babies” are able to get taxpayer-funded disability payments — after one of them was featured on a recent reality TV episode wearing diapers, feeding from a bottle and using an adult-sized crib he built.

Sen. Tom Coburn, Oklahoma Republican and the Senate’s top waste-watcher, asked the agency’s inspector general to look into 30-year-old Stanley Thornton Jr. and his roommate, Sandra Dias, who acts as his “mother,” saying it’s not clear why they are collecting Supplemental Security Income (SSI) benefits instead of working.

“Given that Mr. Thornton is able to determine what is appropriate attire and actions in public, drive himself to complete errands, design and custom-make baby furniture to support a 350-pound adult and run an Internet support group, it is possible that he has been improperly collecting disability benefits for a period of time,” Mr. Coburn wrote in a letter Monday to Inspector General Patrick P. O’Carroll Jr.

God love him – and I know He does – but there’s a prime example of someone who’s a gigantic (literally) waste of oxygen.

(Hat tip to the Emperor.)

This makes me fucking sick.

Go ahead.

Watch it.

If you fucking dare.

I watched the whole thing.

Now I need some industrial-strength brain bleach.

Ew.&#160 Just.&#160 Effing.&#160 Ew.&#160

This is a young lady named Marizela Perez.&#160 She is the cousin of the lovely & gracious Michelle Malkin.

She is missing.&#160 She was last seen in the Ranier Beach area in Seattle, Washington.

Here is the missing persons’ dossier on Marizela, from Michelle’s site:

MISSING PERSON

Name: Marizela Perez

Date Missing: Saturday March 5, 2011

Last Seen: 1-2 P.M. at the Safeway in University District
(4732 Brooklyn Ave NE Seattle, WA 98105) (this is CONFIRMED)

Possible Routes: Sound Link Light Rail stations, downtown/Chinatown areas, UW Seattle campus, U-district

Description – Asian female, 5’5” tall, 110 lbs, skinny build, asymmetrical bob with short bangs and brown/red highlights hairstyle, tattoo on left inner arm with the words ‘lahat ay magiging maayos’ (Tagalog, meaning ‘all will be well’), last seen wearing a dark hooded jacket, denim jeans, light brown suede laced boots, possibly wearing green eye contacts, possibly carrying a denim drawstring bag with rainbow butterfly screenprint (not the plaid backpack that was before mentioned) with a Macbook Pro laptop, taking medication for depression

Please contact if you have any information regarding this person:

Edgar: 609 – 646 – 0905

Jasmin: 609 – 742 – 2360

Mel: 206 – 760 – 1822

Joy: 609 – 742 – 2336

Washington-based Denizens, be on the lookout. Call 911 if you see or find her.

ThatIsAll&#153.

Fox News is reporting that Phaggoty Phred Phelps and his horde of syphilitic inbreds can, indeed, picket soldiers’ funerals.

Like the Travis Tritt (Travis Tritt?) song said, Phaggot Phreddy…the First Amendment can protect you from the government – but it can’t protect you from us.

Ropes, trees, Westboro pussies…y’all know the drill.

How high has Carlos “Charlie Sheen” Estevez jumped his personal shark?

Even his publicist can’t take any more.

Veteran Hollywood publicist Stan Rosenfield, who represented Charlie Sheen through the actor’s rehab attempts and breakup with his employers on the hit sitcom “Two and a Half Men,” abruptly resigned on Monday.

“I have worked with Charlie Sheen for a long time and I care about him very much,” Rosenfield wrote in a brief statement. “However, at this time, I’m unable to work effectively as his publicist and have respectfully resigned.” In a follow-up e-mail, Rosenfield said he had represented Sheen for at least seven years.

The move came on the same day that Sheen turned up in another round of interviews on ABC, NBC, TMZ and elsewhere, attacking everyone from CBS to his father, former “The West Wing” star Martin Sheen. Since CBS and Warner Bros. decided last week to halt production on “Two and a Half Men” after Sheen attacked his boss, Chuck Lorre, the actor has gone on a manic round of media interviews.

Damn.&#160 Just, damn.

Just an idle thought here:&#160 Five’ll get you ten he started with pot. y’think?

Just sayin’.

While your obdt. svt. (a little Blackie Sherrod lingo, there) was busy with “things I learned while looking up other things” (a little more Blackie Sherrod lingo, there) over the weekend, I came across this recap of Playboy’s&#160 entry in the Super Bowl’s Party Parade&#153:

Not coincidentally, an actual Playboy Club is open or will open soon in each of the cities. Last year was the 50th anniversary of the Playboy Club. At the lounges’ height of popularity there were more than 30 before they were shuttered in the 1980s.

But Playboy’s editorial director Jimmy Jellinek insisted the Super Bowl party isn’t all marketing hoopla. “That’s the Maxim party,” he said. “The world’s biggest sausage fest for beer-chugging dudes.” Maxim is having its big shindig Saturday in Fair Park.

The Playboy party is a flagship for the brand, he says by phone from the Admiral’s Club at Chicago’s O’Hare airport, en route to Dallas. “It’s the ultimate bacchanal,” said Jellinek, noting that “if you’re not at the party you’re a loser. The Playboy brand is about classiness and sexiness. This party is the equivalent of Truman Capote’s Black and White Ball.”

Ex-squeeze me?&#160 Baking powder?&#160 “if you’re not at the party you’re a loser”?!?!?!

And I scan down the page and this quote from Playmate Jamie Edmondson catches my eye:

Edmondson, Miss January 2010 and a resident in the official Bunny House across from the Playboy mansion, spun around, taking the scene of her first Super Bowl party. “Anything Playboy is a spectacle,” she said. “All of this reminds me of something at the mansion.”

Ah, yes.&#160 The mansion.&#160 The palatial residece of Playboy&#160 founder Hugh “Hef” Hefner.&#160 The be-all & end-all of all things Playboy.&#160 The center&#160 of the Playboy Universe.&#160 Paradise.

And my mind is inexplicably&#160 (*cough*) to this expos&#233 about Hef’s little Garden of Eden

The portrait of Hefner painted by Izabella St James is deeply unappealing. A pretty blonde law graduate, she was 26 when she met him in a Hollywood nightclub in 2002. Soon, he invited her to move in with him and seven other official ‘girlfriends’.

For Izabella, the Playboy Mansion was far from the glamorous pleasure palace she had imagined. ‘Each ­bedroom had mismatched, random pieces of furniture,’ she recalls in her autobiography Bunny Tales. ‘It was as if someone had gone to a charity shop and bought the basics for each room.

‘Although we all did our best to decorate our rooms and make them homely, the mattresses on our beds were ­disgusting — old, worn and stained. The sheets were past their best, too.

Oh, but that’s not the best part, Denizens:

‘Eventually I persuaded Hef to pay for a new mattress and bed linen — but I had to turn in every single receipt before I was reimbursed.

‘Hef also eventually permitted us to have the rooms painted and recarpeted. But for some reason he insisted on creamy, white-coloured carpets. He liked the girlfriends’ rooms to look very girly, all white carpet and pink walls.

‘It looked great at first, but with two dogs (most of the girlfriends had pets that lived in their rooms — I had two pugs), butlers delivering food, dirty shoes and occasional spillages, the carpet was grey and stained in a matter of months.’

She adds: ‘But then Hef was used to dirty carpets. The one in his bedroom had not been changed for years, and things became significantly worse when Holly Madison moved into his room with him as Girlfriend No. 1 soon after I moved in, bringing her two dogs.

‘They weren’t house-trained and would just do their business on the bedroom carpet. Late at night, or in the early hours of the morning — if any of us visited Hef’s bedroom — we’d almost always end up standing in dog mess.

Actually – and I rather hate to admit this – Pup-Pup’s early life didn’t involve crate-training, so I know pretty much exactly&#160 about all that.

Do&#160 go read the rest of the expos&#233.&#160 If you have the stomach for it, that is.

“Classiness”?&#160 “Sexiness”?

Somehow I get the feeling that Playboy’s&#160 Widdle Jimmy Jellyhead and Jamie Edmondson didn’t quiiiiiite&#160 get around to reading the UK’s Daily Mail.&#160 Y’think?

And I – and you, and you, and you ‘n you ‘n you – are all supposedly “losers” because we’re not – and don’t want to be – part of that.

Sounds like a badge of honor to me.

On this day, 38 years ago, seven men&#160 decided what, exactly, women could do with their bodies.&#160 (That’s for you feminazi bimboids who still bleat about how men shouldn’t have a say in any abortion that occurs anywhere, anytime.)&#160 It was considered – and is still today, in some quarters – an “enlightened” decision that would “liberate” women.

Thirty-eight years later, this carnage in Pennsylvania is what our “enlightenment” has brought us.

An abortion doctor killed hundreds of babies by cutting their spinal cords with scissors after removing them from mothers late in their pregnancies, prosecutors said on Wednesday.

Philadelphia District Attorney Seth Williams charged Dr. Kermitt Gosnell, 69, and nine associates with eight counts of murder, following a year-long investigation by a grand jury, whose report was unveiled on Wednesday.

The defendants are charged with first-degree murder in the cases of seven babies for which there is substantial evidence, Williams said.

Hundreds of other babies are likely to have died in Gosnell’s West Philadelphia clinic, which he operated from 1979 to 2010, Williams said.

No doubt right now there are in this country some feminoid bitches and pussy-whipped (or maybe cock-whipped, who knows?) bastards who still – still – consider this Mengele-wannabe a fucking hero.

As the RCOB&#153 drapes over my eyes solid red, I have only two things to ask:

First, whaddya wanna bet that the Innocence Project tries to get him off at some point?

And, since Pennsylvania’s bleeding-heart court system will probably be wooed by a slick-talking John Edwards-type defense attorney into either letting him off light, or walking altogether – where’s Scott Roeder when you really need him?

ThatIsAll&#153.

Drudge and many others (including Michelle) are reporting that Democrat US Representative Gabrielle Giffords (D-AZ) was shot at point-blank range at a local event in Tuscon.&#160 There are conflicting reports as of this writing on her medical status, i.e. whether or not she is still alive.&#160 Anywhere from four to six others are reported dead in the event.

48-hour rule in effect, and our prayers go out.

UPDATE:&#160 The attending surgeon just stated in a news conference broadcast on Fox News that Representative Giffords is, repeat is, alive and in critical condition in ICU at the Tuscon hospital where she was transported after being shot in the head.&#160 Currently, we have one dead (a young boy girl) at the hospital (making a total of six (corrections?)), five more in surgery.

Thanks be to God, and condolences to the families of the young girl.

UPDATE the 2nd:&#160 Shep Smith at Fox News is now quoting the death toll at five.

UPDATE the 3rd:&#160 CNN & Fox have confirmed that one of the dead is United States District Court Judge John Roll.&#160 He was a Bush (41) appointee back in 1991.

Denizens, remember the bake sales your school would have when you were growing up?&#160 Yer mom would bake a cake, or a pie, or cupcakes, or blueberry muffins, or banana-nut cake, and take it down for you, your schoolmates and their folks to enjoy.

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Great.&#160 Now I’m all hungry.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Yeah, I know.&#160 I’ll see if Mrs. Venomous can whip up some muffins for ye.

T-BONE MCMANX:&#160 She’d do that for us?

VENOMOUS:&#160 Sure.&#160 Not like she can do it for me, what with the diabetes & the low-carb diet ‘n all.

MERLIN:&#160 Schweet.

Anyway, it was a fun thing to do, and usually it benefitted some worthy cause or other – band, choir, a Cub Scout troop, whatever.

Naturally, the Demoscum can’t stand to see Americans enjoying themselves, so here comes the First Wookiee…

CHEWBACCA:&#160 ROWARRRRRRR!!!!!

…uh, the First Klingon…

[Korrioth uses one massive hand to goozle His Rudeness by the throat.]

KORRIOTH:&#160 Suggest you try again, m’liege.

…(ulp)…uh…the First Nossican?

KORRIOTH, K’HADIBAK’H:&#160 Better, sir.

CHEWBACCA:&#160 …urf, urf, urf…

Ain’t no pleasing some people.

Anyway, Her Wide-Assedness told the Imperial Socalist Congress&#153 to jump, they got on collective knee, kissed her fat ass and asked “How high?”, and this bullshit is the result.

A child nutrition bill on its way to President Barack Obama — and championed by the first lady — gives the government power to limit school bake sales and other fundraisers that health advocates say sometimes replace wholesome meals in the lunchroom.

“This could be a real train wreck for school districts,” Lucy Gettman of the National School Boards Association said Friday, a day after the House cleared the bill. “The federal government should not be in the business of regulating this kind of activity at the local level.”

If Bambi signs this piece-of-shit, it could be a real train wreck for the Demoscum in 2012.&#160 Not bad enough that they’ve moved to throw our economy in the shitter; not bad enough that they want to tell us we have&#160 to buy health insurance – now they wanna tell us we can’t even have bake sales???

The legislation, part of first lady Michelle Obama’s campaign to stem childhood obesity, provides more meals at school for needy kids, including dinner

…by which time the little rug-rats ought to be home anyway – but don’t let those inconvenient little facts get in the First Nossican’s way.

and directs the Agriculture Department to write guidelines to make those meals more healthful. The bill would apply to all foods sold in schools during regular class hours, including in the cafeteria line, in vending machines and at fundraisers.

It wouldn’t apply to after-hours events or concession stands at sports events.

Oh, but you just know&#160 they’d either try to find a way around that, or else repeal that little provision within three years.

I would honest-to-Cthulu like to see some dickless little bureaucratic pissweasel with a bad combover just try&#160 to enforce any&#160 of this BS.

The fuckhead had best bring a slew of bodyguards with him.&#160 IYKWIMAITYD.

The RCOB&#153 is in full effect.

Unfortunately, it’s not the round, orange vegetable variety that got chunked.  Read on here.

Sorry about the play on words, but I’m right in the middle of stress relieving measures that involves large quantities of adult carbonated beverages. 

Time for the eye for an eye concept of justice RSN.

UPDATE:&#160 (From Venomous) Added to the “Sickening Stuff” category.

(Hat tip Doug Powers, writing for Michelle.)

Oh, how lovely.&#160 The Ayatollah is on yet another vacation.

BAR HARBOR — Julia Freifeld, of Raleigh, N.C., was absolutely certain she knew where the Obamas would make a stop during their weekend getaway on Mount Desert Island.

She staked out Ben & Bill’s Chocolate Emporium on Main Street in Bar Harbor [, Maine – Ed.].

“They are going to bring their daughters here,” she said Friday afternoon.

Ah, but Denizens – that’s not the worst of it.&#160 Oh hell&#160 no.

Arriving in a small jet before the Obamas was the first dog, Bo, a Portuguese water dog given as a present by the late U.S. Sen Ted Kennedy, D-Mass.; and the president’s personal aide Reggie Love, who chatted with Baldacci.

That’s right, sportz fanz.&#160 The First Mutt&#153 gets his own.&#160 Fucking.&#160 Plane.

While the rest of us are taking pay cuts in this economy – that is to say, those of us fortunate enough&#160 to even have&#160 jobs – Jugears McFuckinHopenchange screws the pooch that is the United States even further&#160 by making sure li’l Bo-Bo has his own bad-ass self his very own first-class seat.

Air traffic at the small Hancock County-Bar Harbor Airport in Trenton was shut down for the presidential arrival. A U.S. Coast Guard helicopter patrolled the air in anticipation of the first family’s touchdown, and a pair of local fire and rescue trucks stood ready on an otherwise empty tarmac at the private air hangar.

The Obamas then traveled onto Mount Desert Island in a motorcade of at least 16 vehicles. It was led by two Maine State Police cruisers and included five black Chevrolet Suburbans.

Meanwhile, the unemployment rate hovers at nine-and-a-half percent.&#160 And it’s that low only because of all the folks who’ve long-since given up looking for work.&#160 Include them, and unemployment stands somewhere around 18%.

All while Bambi goes, plays Yet Another Round Of Golf&#153, takes the First Brats for yet more ice cream, goes on another “date night” with the First Wookiee&#153 – and makes Big Production Numbers&#153 out of the whole thing.

You’re a son-of-a-crack-whore-bitch, Bambi.&#160 Fuck you, you effing schlemiel, that stupid-assed mutt and&#160 the horses you both rode in on.

That does it.&#160 I’m officially Getting Old&#153.

Heard “Sharp Dressed Man” by ZZ Top today.

On the local oldies&#160 station.

Damn.&#160 Dammit.&#160 Damn.&#160 It.&#160 All.&#160 To.&#160 Hell&#153.&#160