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Denizens, as we start the final Perfect Football Weekend™ of the season, we have ourselves a WITY™ to share with you guys.

Remember about two or three weeks ago, I said this?


Jenn Sterger’s manager, Phil Reese, said Thursday that she would like the league to “implement a program” to prevent unwanted advances — similar to those she’s alleging Favre made. Reese said Sterger wants the league to discipline Favre before his career ends.

They’d best hurry. There’s a greater-than-zero chance Favre doesn’t play against the NY Football Douchebags – and, with his big consecutive-games streak done, and the ViQueens out of the playoff picture, there’d be no reason to play him any further – and the guess from here is that after this season, he’s done.

And true to form, the NFL…is sweeping the whole thing under the rug.

Down to the last few days of the season and maybe Brett Favre’s career, the NFL ended a slow-paced investigation of tawdry allegations against the quarterback with a $50,000 fine and a rebuke for not being candid.

The league punished one of its marquee players for failing to cooperate with investigators who were trying to determine if the 41-year-old quarterback sent inappropriate messages and below-the-belt photos to Jenn Sterger in 2008, when both worked for the New York Jets.

The ruling came days before what could be the final game for the three-time MVP. He’ll start for Minnesota at Detroit on Sunday if he’s recovered from a concussion sustained Dec. 20 against Chicago, and has said this will be his final season, though he’s unretired in the past. He made the declaration even before his NFL record for consecutive starts was snapped at 297 in mid-December.

Oh, yeah, that’s  gonna put the hurt to Mr. Pants-on-the-Ground, YesSirreeBob™.  How’s ol’ Brett gonna ever  endure the pain, the humiliation, the absolute fucking shame  of it all?  And losing that $50 large is just a-gonna put him in the poor house!!!!, Bah Gawd (a little Good Ol’ J.R. lingo, there)!!!!!1!!ONE!!!1!!ELEVENTYMILLIONTEEN!!!1!

Well, guys?  What’d I Tell Ya?™ 

For her part, Sterger is…somewhat torqued about the whole thing:

“Today’s decision is an affront to all females and shows once again that, despite tough talk, the NFL remains the good old boys’ league.”

– Joseph R. Conway, attorney for Jenn Sterger

Well, Jenn, I’d say it’s time to put up or shut up.  That lawsuit should be making its way westward to Minnie-haha Real Soon Now™, if your credibility is to remain anywhere near the size of your gorgeous chest.

Awright, on to the football.  In bowl season, you don’t get many rematches of a regular-season game, but we have one tonight.  Bo Pelini will take his 17th-ranked Nebraska Cornhuskers into battle tonight for the Holiday Bowl in San Diego, where Taylor Martinez (or Cody Green or Zac Lee, take your pick) will match wits against the UWashington Huskies’ Jake Locker.  Locker’s the latest incarnation of Ryan Leaf – meaning only a few folks in Washington think he’s any good, while the rest us are are suitably unimpressed.

Big Red’s favored by 13½.  If the Blackshirts are healthy, it should be considerably more.

Saturday, Bob Stoops takes his ninth-ranked Oklahoma Sooners to the Fiesta Bowl to take on the Connecticut Huskies.  The Sooners won’t have running back Roy Finch, but they’ll have RB DeMarco Murray and QB Landry Jones.  They should be fine.

Vegas has OU favored by 17.  Let’s just say that UConn’s football team isn’t quite  as good as its women’s hoops team.  OU won’t have any trouble here.

The marquee matchup for us will also be Saturday, as the Rose Bowl features two PFW teams – fourth-ranked Bucky takes on Gary Patterson’s third-ranked Texas Christian Horned Frogs.  It’ll be the Badgers’ size versus the Frogs’ speed.

Generally, I hate matchups like this – remember a couple years ago when I posted this? I was worried about Matt Panfil getting pushed around by Phil Loadholt, and I was right (in fact, that could’ve been a WITY™ right there).  I’m just as worried this week that Bucky’s gonna pound on the TCU defensive front until it collapses.

Therefore, TCU had best jump out to a quick, big lead.  Let it remain close into the fourth quarter, and Bucky will win this game.  Don’t let that happen, Gary Patterson.

Sunday, the Dallas Cowgirlz bring a merciful end to the season, as they go to Pussydelphia to play Mikey “Woof Woof Yikes!!!” Vick and the rest of the Beagles.  No way Dallas wins this game – but if there’s any justice (and if Dallas has any balls to speak of), DeShawna Jackoff leaves the game on a cart after trying to showboat one more time.

Then again, what am I talking about?  These are the Cowgirlz – we’ve known they’ve had no balls since Owner Jethro whined about Dez Bryant getting his ankle tweaked in training camp.  Dallas, just go, expose your belly to the Beagles and put us out of our misery for another year.

Final recap and the Benediction™ will be Monday.  Hopefully, we’ll have something to celebrate around these parts.




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