Yes, Denizens - I know it's Cafe Press. Yes, I know that they're a liberal-owned company. Yes, I'm aware that the quality of their garments may not be quite as good as ThoseShirts.com.
But unlike ThoseShirts.com, Cafe Press ACTUALLY ANSWERS THE EMAIL I SEND THEM!!!!
Got clue, ThoseShirts???
Local time where you're at. ("Where you're at"?)
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Warning: Emails are fodder for the blog. IOW, if you want your email kept private, you must tell me in the email.
Otherwise, it's mine to do with as I please, and if I want to use it on the blog, I'm perfectly free to do so.
You have now been warned.
A train set! Cool!
Thanks, Dad!
Thank you, Algore.
(snicker)
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[SCENE:  Unknown.  A black, empty, seemingly lifeless void in space.
Well, not completely  lifeless.  As we pan (not easy to do, as everything appears black), a prone, hooded figure appears, motionless, on the ground, as if in a spotlight.  (No, we don’t know where the spotlight is coming from – let’s not go there, ‘k?)
After a couple of beats, the figure stirs, groaning in pain that seemingly racks its entire body.]
HOODED FIGURE:  Unnnhhh…uhhhh…damn.  I do  hope someone got the license plate of that battlecruiser…ow.
[The hooded figure rises to a kneeling position, shakes its head a couple of time, then removes the hood to reveal Lord Darth Venomous, who was previously thought to have been killed in the destruction of the ISS Titanic.  He looks left, then right, not seeing much.]
VENOMOUS:  Well, if this is my own personal Nexus, where the hell is Miss CJ Miles and the rest  of my Asian hookers…?
(NOTE TO READERS:  That’s a personal dig at Mrs. Venomous, FYI.  Fortunately, she’s at home and I’m here in this…wherever it is…so she can’t kabong me.  
  )
[Some sort of bright light flips on behind Lord Venomous.  He whirls around to look, and blanches.]
VENOMOUS:  What the…oh, shit.
[Not a drop of blood remains in His Rudeness’ face as he reads the sign.]
Sign up
It’s free and always will be.
VENOMOUS (muttering bitterly):  “Welcome to Hell.  How do  you like it?”
—
Yes, Denizens.  After years of resisting temptation, I’m now officially on Facebook.  Come find me & friend me.  (Hint:  There are apparently two (I knew  I shoulda trademarked it); I will be the one of Palpatine shooting purple Force lightning.)
Or not, I don’t care.
Thanks for reading the Death of the ISS Titanic  series.  Will have another mini-vignette for you soon.  And some  Klingons & union-types had best  watch their backs…  
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3 responses to “Death of the ISS Titanic:  Facebook Hell”
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- _______________
- This blog is best viewed with your eyes.
- It helps, though, if you have Microsoft Internet Explorer
set about 1024x7681280x1024 with your Favorites windowactivated on the leftdeactivated. (At least until I can get a better handle on how WordPress works.)
(KORRIOTH: Oh, great. More wormholes.)
Mozilla Firefox doesn't do too badly, either; in fact, it's His Rudeness' browser of choice. -
You can use
Nutscrape,
if you so desire - but why in blazes would you want to use a browser from a company that had to hide behind Janet El Reño's skirt to be successful?
And don't even get me started on Opera or Chrome. I'm not about to trust any browser that won't let me change its color scheme.
Which account are you using? The one named Darth Venomous, or the one with your more vanilla alter ego who graduated from some podunk high school called Arlington Heights? 🙂 Or maybe you will use them both?
Just remember a certain small college compadre..
I’ll have you know that “podunk high school” went all the way to the state semifinal in basketball this past year! 