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Bullshit.

Just bullshit.

One hundred percent pure, unadulterated, non-biodegradeable bullshit.

First Mikey “Needledick” Schiavo, now this.&#160 What the everlovin’ fuck&#160 is it about Flori-duh and their nadless inability to get justice for cold-blooded murderers?

One thing’s for sure – there are between twelve & fifteen cowardly douchebags in Orlando right now.

(Or, Never Mind The Dog – Beware Of Owner! (grin))

Mrs. Venomous is…uh, shall we say…reticent&#160 around the preferred method of defense in the Realm&#153.

RAYEGUN:&#160 Y’mean, she’s afraid of guns?

VENOMOUS:&#160 A severe character flaw, I know.

MRS. VENOMOUS (with skillet):&#160 WHAT?!?!?!?!?!

MERLIN:&#160 And you married her despite this?

MRS. VENOMOUS (with skillet):&#160

VENOMOUS:&#160 Gentlemen, may I suggest you start running now?&#160 I’ll finish the post whilst you save your asses.

MRS. VENOMOUS (with skillet):&#160 Grrrrrrrr…

Anyway, the Department of Improvisation&#153 relates to us the story of this Florida couple who demonstrates to us that one doesn’t always need a firearm to defend oneself.

Things just didn’t pan out for whoever invaded 81-year-old Bobby Smith’s Jacksonville home Saturday afternoon.

In fact, you might say the robber got the point – literally – after the Korean War Navy veteran was through with him.

Smith and his caregiver used a pan full of fried potatoes and a pitchfork to drive the attacker away. A compact man with a close-trimmed gray haircut, Smith said he wasn’t scared.

“I was angry; I was upset; and I was as mad as all outdoors,” Smith said Wednesday. “If I’d had my gun, like I normally would have, I would have shot him because he was in my home. I don’t like people hurting my family or my home.”

Now there’s&#160 Castle Doctrine&#153 for you.&#160 Get the point?

ALL:&#160 Ew.&#160 Just, ew.

Now, if y’all will excuse me, I have a frying pan to actively avoid…

This is a young lady named Marizela Perez.&#160 She is the cousin of the lovely & gracious Michelle Malkin.

She is missing.&#160 She was last seen in the Ranier Beach area in Seattle, Washington.

Here is the missing persons’ dossier on Marizela, from Michelle’s site:

MISSING PERSON

Name: Marizela Perez

Date Missing: Saturday March 5, 2011

Last Seen: 1-2 P.M. at the Safeway in University District
(4732 Brooklyn Ave NE Seattle, WA 98105) (this is CONFIRMED)

Possible Routes: Sound Link Light Rail stations, downtown/Chinatown areas, UW Seattle campus, U-district

Description – Asian female, 5’5” tall, 110 lbs, skinny build, asymmetrical bob with short bangs and brown/red highlights hairstyle, tattoo on left inner arm with the words ‘lahat ay magiging maayos’ (Tagalog, meaning ‘all will be well’), last seen wearing a dark hooded jacket, denim jeans, light brown suede laced boots, possibly wearing green eye contacts, possibly carrying a denim drawstring bag with rainbow butterfly screenprint (not the plaid backpack that was before mentioned) with a Macbook Pro laptop, taking medication for depression

Please contact if you have any information regarding this person:

Edgar: 609 – 646 – 0905

Jasmin: 609 – 742 – 2360

Mel: 206 – 760 – 1822

Joy: 609 – 742 – 2336

Washington-based Denizens, be on the lookout. Call 911 if you see or find her.

ThatIsAll&#153.

Professor Jacobson warned us – and now Michelle has confirmed – that the Capitol police have deliberately refused to do their duty and throw the remaining protestors pussies douchebags pussies & douchebags out of the Capitol.

Denizens, when historians discuss the Second Civil War, they will be doing you a disservice if they don’t tell you it started in Madison, Wisconsin.&#160 The only question is how quickly the shooting will mushroom across the country.

It gets bumpy from here.

The Jawas & Bynars at the Deparment of Instant Karma’s Gonna Get You&#153, realizing it’s been over two years since they last earned any of their pay – and glancing warily over at the Sith Lord glaring at them with lightsaber in hand – have decided to chime in with this update on widdle Julia Ass-mange.

Leaked Swedish police documents on the Julian Assange sex cases raise key questions for both sides about the allegations. Was one of the WikiLeaks founder’s Swedish lovers asleep during intercourse? Did she consent to unprotected sex? Those answers will determine whether rape was committed under Swedish law.

[…]

In leaked police documents that emerged this week on the Internet, the Swedish woman accusing Assange of rape woke up as he was having sex with her, but let him continue even though she knew he wasn’t wearing a condom.

She says she insisted that Assange wear a condom when they had sex in her apartment in the Swedish city of Enkoping on Aug. 16, and that he reluctantly agreed. The incident labeled as rape happened the next morning, when the woman claims she was woken up by Assange having unprotected sex with her.

“She immediately asked: `Are you wearing anything?’ and he answered `You,'” according to a police summary of her deposition. “She said to him `You better don’t have HIV’ and he answered `Of course not.’ She felt it was too late. He was already inside her and she let him continue.”

Having sex with a sleeping person can be considered rape in Sweden, but the details in the leaked transcript could explain why different prosecutors have made different assessments of the incident.

Feel thou free to readeth the rest.

Now, we have to admit – if we’re to believe the Asphyxated Piss, this would appear to be somewhat exculpatory towards widdlw Miss Ass-mange.&#160 We just think it’s extremely funny that (s)he who would embarrass the governments of the world via the leaked document should now come to be embarrassed himself by the same.

(Not that widdle Julia would even have&#160 a sense of embarrassment, but still.)

ITEM:&#160 Guy by the name of James Eric Fuller – at least, we think&#160 that’s his name; there appears to be evidence out there to the contrary – was one of the shooting victims last week in Tucson.

Apparently, the little jackwagon blames the Tea Party.

In its story on the arrest, The New York Times said Fuller reported last week that he had trouble sleeping after he was wounded. The paper said that in an interview last week, Fuller repeatedly denounced the “Tea Party crime syndicate,” and said he placed some of the blame for the shooting on Sarah Palin and other Republican leaders, saying he believed they had contributed to a toxic atmosphere.

Oh, yeah – the arrest.&#160 Seems he wanted to take his frustrations out on the Tea Party physically.

In an unexpected twist to the Arizona shootings, a man wounded in the attack was arrested and taken for a psychiatric exam after an outburst at a town hall meeting, during which he took a picture of a tea party leader and yelled, “You’re dead,” authorities say.

James Eric Fuller, 63, was detained on misdemeanor disorderly conduct and threat charges Saturday during the event taped for a special edition of ABC’s “This Week,” Pima County sheriff’s spokesman Jason Ogan said.

The Tea Partier was apparently suggesting that we not go all knee-jerk on proposing new gun-control laws.&#160 (Or, as the Demoscum would call it, “standard operating procedure”.)

For his trouble, Fuller got the white jacket.

Ogan said deputies decided he needed a mental health evaluation, and he was taken to a hospital, which will determine when he will be released.

My question is…why?&#160 He was only being a typical Demoscum, after all.

Then again, what’s Savage always said?&#160 About how liberalism being a mental disorder ‘n all…?&#160

Drudge and many others (including Michelle) are reporting that Democrat US Representative Gabrielle Giffords (D-AZ) was shot at point-blank range at a local event in Tuscon.&#160 There are conflicting reports as of this writing on her medical status, i.e. whether or not she is still alive.&#160 Anywhere from four to six others are reported dead in the event.

48-hour rule in effect, and our prayers go out.

UPDATE:&#160 The attending surgeon just stated in a news conference broadcast on Fox News that Representative Giffords is, repeat is, alive and in critical condition in ICU at the Tuscon hospital where she was transported after being shot in the head.&#160 Currently, we have one dead (a young boy girl) at the hospital (making a total of six (corrections?)), five more in surgery.

Thanks be to God, and condolences to the families of the young girl.

UPDATE the 2nd:&#160 Shep Smith at Fox News is now quoting the death toll at five.

UPDATE the 3rd:&#160 CNN & Fox have confirmed that one of the dead is United States District Court Judge John Roll.&#160 He was a Bush (41) appointee back in 1991.

Unfortunately, it’s not the round, orange vegetable variety that got chunked.  Read on here.

Sorry about the play on words, but I’m right in the middle of stress relieving measures that involves large quantities of adult carbonated beverages. 

Time for the eye for an eye concept of justice RSN.

UPDATE:&#160 (From Venomous) Added to the “Sickening Stuff” category.

Item:&#160 A state marshal in Kennycut (gratuitous Family Affair reference alert!) got caught with his pants down (figuratively) the other day, having to apologize for…well…

…for paying $15 for a lap dance at a New Haven strip club when he went there to serve a city tax warrant to the owner.

The New Haven Register reports that Marshal William Nolan broke down crying and apologized while testifying Tuesday before two members of the State Marshal Commission, who will be recommending to the full board whether Nolan should be disciplined.

Commission members have found probable cause that Nolan unreasonably blurred the lines between professional and personal conduct at Stage Door Johnny’s last March.

Nolan is also accused of charging club owner Johnny Kraft 10 percent more than the $9,800 he owed the city in back taxes, which Kraft has since paid. Nolan said it was a simple mistake.

Lord Venomous’ reaction:&#160 They’re only charging $15 for lap dances in Connecticut?&#160 They’re $20 down here!&#160 I wanna move!!!

MRS. VENOMOUS (with heavy-duty cast-iron skillet):&#160 KA-BONNNNNNG!!!!1!!ONE!1!ELEVENTY!!1!!

Uh, ow.&#160

Item:&#160 Former House Speaker and Texas congressman Tom DeLay was cleared by the Justice Department the other day on corruption charges.

Tom DeLay, the former Republican speaker of the House of Representatives, said on Monday that he had been cleared by the Justice Department in its long-running political corruption probe.

[…]

DeLay resigned from Congress in 2006 amid questions about his ties to Abramoff and after he was indicted in his home state of Texas for alleged campaign finance violations, charges he is still fighting.

Two of his former aides pleaded guilty in the Abramoff scandal as did former Republican Representative Bob Ney, who admitted he illegally accepted trips, meals, concert tickets and other valuable items in exchange for official acts on behalf of Abramoff and his clients.

“It was good news to hear from the Department of Justice that I have been cleared,” DeLay told reporters during a conference call. “I always knew this day would come; my only hope was that it would come much sooner.”

Item:&#160 The New York Slimes&#160 twisted its panties in a knot over the news:

The Justice Department decided last week not to bring charges against Tom DeLay, whose unethical conduct represented a modern low among Congressional leaders. The decision is a reminder that some of Washington’s worst big-money practices remain either legal or far too difficult to prosecute.

(Side note:&#160 Hey, Slimes?&#160 Two words:&#160 1) Clinton.&#160 2) China.&#160 Show a little angst & hand-wringing over that, and we’ll talk.)

Item:&#160 Darleen Click over at Protein Wisdom&#160 made note of this, but then couldn’t resist getting in a shot of her own:

Whatever one might think of DeLay’s ethical issues, and they are legion, the NYTimes again shows that when it comes controlling the micro actions of everyday living, no one wants it more or demands it more through legislation than the Left.

Uh, ex-squeeze me?&#160 Baking powder?

“And they are legion”?

Uh, Darleen, I’m pretty sure the trackback will never make it over there, but I’m a little confused.

Perhaps you could explain, in your infinite&#160 (cough) wisdom, to exactly which&#160 “ethical issues” DeLay has to which you object…?

I seem to remember that Mr. DeLay was an excellent Speaker, managing to push through a conservative agenda through the first Bush term, and was only forced to resign using a Republican House rule that (surprise, surprise!) never has managed to keep a Demoscummic Speaker of the House from serving.&#160 (Jim Wright, the Sleazer of the House, for one.)

I’ll just be sitting over here in the corner with my copy of the Federation-Shelliak peace treaty while you manage to sift through your notes and enlighten&#160 us all as to what, exactly, DeLay actually did to earn the wrath of a saint&#160 such as yourself.

For some reason, I imagine I’ll be waiting a while.

It’s a damned shame that the poor ol’ granny in Florida didn’t up and pull the trigger after this waste of skin dropped the gun.

Guy would be an ideal candidate for Darwin.&#160

ITEM:&#160 Couple weeks back, the son of the new Dallas police chief got somewhat bent out of shape and wound up killing a cop.&#160 Over & above the angst about that was the absolute outrage sparked when one of the deputy chiefs in charge of the traffic division issued an order that, in effect, granted the perp a funeral procession.&#160 (And in answer to your unspoken next question, yes – the perp did die in the subsequent exchange.)

The Lame Stream Media&#153 reaction was probably what you would hope for – it ripped everyone involved in the making of that decision, and rightly approving of a subsequent probe into the matter.

ITEM:&#160 Couple days ago, the mayor of a Dallas suburb, Coppell, killed her 19-year-old daughter before taking her own life.

The media reaction to this is…ah…somewhat more restrained.

My question:&#160 Why?&#160 Two murderers, one properly condemned, the other…not?&#160 One black, the other…white.

Something smells damned fishy in Denmark, IYAM.

Y’know, some enterprising young – er, um – “goodfella” (yeah, that’s right, that’s the ticket, yeah)…might go up to a certain coffee shop in Portland – and, um, engage in some…uh…”transactory business”.

Yeah.&#160 Right.&#160 There ya go.

And if the local gendarmes&#160 managed to…oh, I dunno…be on a donut break around that time – well, I’m not a Portland resident, of course, but I’d be inclined to forgive such a donut break, y’know?

In late December, I slipped while in the middle of scratching an itchy ear.

With my car key.

MERLIN:&#160 Ow.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Doofus.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Aah, whatever.

Didn’t puncture the eardrum, fortunately, but did scratch up the ear canal pretty good, to the point where I had to take a little extra care of it for a couple of weeks.

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 You mean, like only scratching it with plastic&#160 stuff?

VENOMOUS:&#160 Hush, you.

However, that doesn’t even begin&#160 to compare to what this dumb-assed Rooskie cop did.

Ladies & gentlemen, I give you…your&#160 Darwin Award (oughta be) winner for 2010!

INVESTIGATORS believe a young Moscow cop died after scratching his nose with his loaded gun.

The Moskovsky Komsomolets reports the 23-year-old policeman, who was not named, was found under a desk with a head wound. The investigation ruled out a murder and there was no note that would indicate suicide, the paper said.

Ow.&#160 Just, ow.&#160

(Via Drudge)

This blood is on the pro-amnesty bastards’ hands.