Local time where you're at. ("Where you're at"?)

Okay, boyz & girlz, it’s time once again to play His Rudeness’ 17th-favorite game, “Rip A New One For The Jackass Who Posted A Comment In An Old Thread”!!! (And no, I still haven’t found the list of the first 16.)

MERLIN:&#160 Are you ever&#160 gonna find that list, m’Liege?

LSIK&T:&#160 Got McManx looking for it even as we speak.

[Five-second cut scene:&#160 an orange-brown-white-ish planet somewhere in the Badlands – a planet which, if it weren’t&#160 in the Badlands, might be mistaken for Gothos.&#160 Zooming in to the surface, we find Cadet T-Bone McManx on his knees, filter mask on his face, a tube connected thereto which supplies him with a not-quite-sparse-but-dwindling supply of oxygen.]

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 What did he ever do to you, m’Lord?

LSIK&T:&#160 It was either him or you, and you outrank him.

[McCool immediately leaps to the floor and begins kissing Spats’ steel-toed boot.]

LSIK&T:&#160 That’s enough, Ozy.

KORRIOTH:&#160 So who’s our lucky contestant today, Admiral?

LSIK&T:&#160 We got us a jerkface from what looks like San Antonio, some dipshit named “rmontero”

KORRIOTH:&#160 Good Gawd&#153, another e.e.cummings wannabe…?

LSIK&T:&#160 Oh, you’d like this one, Korr.&#160 He whines.

[Korrioth bares his teeth & snarls fiercely.]

LSIK&T:&#160 Exactly.

Anyway, here’s this “rmontero” character, ostensibly from San Antonio, and he’s bitching about what I said about Tammy Faye.

MERLIN:&#160 Actually, Your Rudeness&#153, I think he might’ve been objecting to what you said about Jim.

LSIK&T:&#160 What, that he single-handedly destroyed his own empire?

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Or maybe “single-dickedly” is what raised his tutu.

ALL:&#160 (howls of laughter)

LSIK&T:&#160 Okay, McCool, you’re now a Lieutenant (j.g.)

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 (bows) Thank you, sir.

LSIK&T:&#160 Awright, where were we…?

You are so sad!

No, actually I’m pretty happy nowadays.

MERLIN:&#160 What about that deal with…

LSIK&T:&#160 Shh.

MERLIN:&#160 But…

LSIK&T:&#160 (shoots a very&#160 irritated look towards Merlin.)

MERLIN:&#160 (ulp!)

You like to throw stones?

KORRIOTH:&#160 Actually, he likes to throw fists.

LSIK&T:&#160 Actually, to a weenie like this guy, they’d probably feel&#160 like stones.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Point.

You like to be heard

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Actually, he likes to be read.

LSIK&T:&#160 Well, that is&#160 why I do this.

MERLIN:&#160 You’d think&#160 that’d be obvious to him.

LSIK&T:&#160 About as obvious as knowing when a post is still on the front page?

MERLIN:&#160 Point.

and the only way anyONE reads your filth

MERLIN:&#160 AnyONE?

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Not anyTWO?

THE SPATULAGODDESS&#153:&#160 Or anyTHREE, even.

LSIK&T:&#160 Hi, sweetheart!!! (hugs) How’s the move?

THE SPATULAGODDESS&#153:&#160 We’re pretty much in.&#160 Are you gonna be online the same time I am anytime soon?

LSIK&T:&#160 (hangs head in shame) Sorry.&#160 Guilty as charged.

THE SPATULAGODDESS&#153:&#160 That’s okay, hon.&#160 (kisses His Rudeness&#153 on the cheek, then disappears)

KORRIOTH:&#160 (shakes head) What is&#160 it with you and women, anyway?

LSIK&T:&#160 It helps to not have a ridged forehead.

(Korrioth gives Spats his own vicious glare.&#160 Spats just snickers.&#160 &#160 )

is if you print filth.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Maybe he’s referring to the fact that you mentioned Der Kaiser&#153.

LSIK&T:&#160 Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…could be?&#160

You should be ashamed and look in the mirror spider brains

KORRIOTH:&#160 Aw, look.&#160 He even signed it!

MERLIN:&#160 You’re starting to attract a different class of troll, m’Liege.

LSIK&T:&#160 Oh, thanks, Wizard.&#160 Now I’m gonna be up half the night wondering if that was a compliment…

MERLIN:&#160

Oh, and “rmontero”:&#160 Fuck off, jackass.&#160 Try staying on the front page next time.&#160