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Well, to paraphrase an old stand-up comic…last night I watched a Michael Vick public burial and a football game broke out.

Dallas 16, Pew-stun 14, Mike Carey’s Blind-Assed Excuse for an Officiating Crew 14
Jacksonville 21, Green Bay 13
New England 24, Carolina 7
Pittsburgh 27 Philadelphia 13
Atlanta 24, Cincinnati 19

Was that a football game last night or a public wringing-of-the-hands-in-angst over the Widdle Mikey Vick imbroligio?&#160 I mean, you couldn’t go five minutes without Tirico, Jaworski & Kornheiser bringing it up.&#160 What, was PeTA writing the fookin’ script or something?

Anyway, Joey Harrington didn’t look all that bad in leading the Falcons to a win at home, throwing two touchdown passes in about a half’s worth of work.&#160 Carson Palmer had a couple of touchdown passes for the Bengals – the first ones of their preseason.&#160 It didn’t help that they had 14 players out with injuries.

…

Who says you need reps in practice?&#160 Not Pats quarterback Tom Brady:

Two days after Brady missed practice to fly to Los Angeles where his ex-girlfriend, actress Bridget Moynahan, gave birth to their son, Brady returned to the Patriots and was nearly flawless in New England’s 24-7 exhibition win over the Carolina Panthers on Friday.

Ah, but just wait until he gets hit with the child support papers.&#160

…

There’s just no pleasing some people.

Ben Rothelisberger throws for damn-near 250 yards, leads the Steelers on three scoring drives (okay, so two of ’em were FGs – whatever), and he’s pissed about it:

“No, I’m not real happy,” he said. “We missed a couple of things, some things could have been better, but I told some of those guys I’ll get better and I’ll be sure to hit them.”

Sheesh.

OTOH, how long before the Philthy fans (did I really say that?&#160 &#160 ) start clamoring for Kevin Kolb to replace Donna McFlabb as the starter?&#160 The World’s Greatest Quarterback Ever In The History Of Ever, Ever&#153 was only 5-of-11 for 60 yards, while Kolb went 26-of-37 for 242.

…

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again:&#160 Eleven-on-eighteen is not a fair fight.

Dallas goes three-and-out on its first possession, then punts to little pipsqueak Jackoff Jacoby Jones, who promptly runs 91 yards the other way for the first Tex-anne touchdown.

Except that Pewstun committed a clip of the left-side gunner on the play.

Except that it wasn’t called.&#160 Fucking excuse-for-a-side judge looked right at it&#160 – and didn’t call it.&#160 Pretty much de rigueur&#160 for the ‘Boys the rest of the night:&#160 Get mugged by Pewstun – no call.&#160 Breathe on a Tex-anne – 10 yard penalty.

Romo didn’t have a great game, though he did throw TDs each to Widdle Terri Owens and Jason Witten.&#160 The offensive line was just that – offensive; the running game was non-existant.&#160 And Martin Grammitica has kicked himself out of a job for the second straight year, missing the PAT on the Owens TD (he’ll get cut this week or next with an injury settlement – you heard it here first).

Terrence Newman showed why he’s the Dallas defensive MVP.&#160 He missed the game with plantar facsitis (sp?) in his heel, forcing the other cornerbacks to move up a spot.&#160 Whereupon backup Jacques Reeves got beat for a 20-yard rainbow for a touchdown by the aforementioned Jackoff Jones.

(Incidentally, speaking of Jones, he should be damned glad I wasn’t trailing him on that punt return when he did a somersault over the goal line.&#160 My elbows are pretty damned sharp, plus I wouldn’t have had much trouble leading with the crown of my helmet on the late hit.&#160 &#160 )

Next PFW is in two days.&#160 And this time, it counts for real (at least, on the HS and NCAA sides).&#160 Start gearing up now, LCs & Denizens.