Welcome to the Realm™ - Version 5.0...
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[SCENE:&#160 On the bridge of ISS Titanic.&#160 The ship has just returned to Realm&#153 spacedock after a successful month-long shakedown cruise to test the new warp core.&#160 Chief Engineer Ozymandias McCool is beaming with pride at the rave review being given to him by Admiral Darth Venomous.]

VENOMOUS:&#160 …we even got to test the upgraded particle disruptors, and for once, we made it through a successful mission without something or other blowing up.&#160 I think you’ve earned that promotion back to Lieutenant Commander, Ozy, and it pleases me to so bestow you now…

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 Thank you, Admiral.

VENOMOUS:&#160 …and Wizard, if you want to embark on that vacation I’ve been promising you, I’ve taken the liberty of making a reservation for you on Risa.

MERLIN:&#160 Thank you, m’liege.&#160 At my age, it is sorely needed.&#160 No pun intended, of course.

VENOMOUS:&#160 Just one condition, my friend:&#160 Under no circumstance are you to bring me a horga’hn – Mrs. Venomous would have what’s left of my skillet-battered head.

ALL:&#160 BWAH-HAHAHAHA…!!!

[The laughter is rudely interrupted by a massive rocking of Titanic&#160 and a simultaneous power failure.&#160 The senior staff, including Venomous, are thrown about the bridge.&#160 The automatic red-alert klaxons begin blaring.]

VENOMOUS (shouting at the nearest intercom):&#160 Bridge to Engineering, report!!!

OFFSTAGE VOICE (over speaker):&#160 1100 1001 1111 0000 1ac420dfee 1010 0101 ac2df19e…

[Even Venomous raises an eyebrow at that.&#160 He’s never heard a Bynar use hexidecimal before.]

VENOMOUS:&#160 Ozy, what the hell was he saying?!?!

[Ozy’s face is as white as a sheet.]

OZY MCCOOL:&#160 There’s been an explosion in Engineering and they’re losing containment!&#160 He’s estimating 10 minutes to a warp core breach!!!

VENOMOUS:&#160 Oh, shit, not again.&#160 Awright, guys, secure all stations and let’s get out of here!&#160 T-Bone, get on it.

T-BONE MCMANX:&#160 Aye, sir!&#160 [He touches some controls and leans toward the pickup.]&#160 All hands abandon ship!&#160 Repeat, all hands abandon ship.&#160 This is not&#160 a drill.&#160 I repeat, all hands abandon ship…

VENOMOUS (muttering to himself):&#160 Just once&#160 could I get some writers whose effing solution to everything wasn’t to blow up the damned ship…?!??!?!?!?!

Working through some issues here, Denizens.&#160 Will try to post as time allows.&#160 (It’s nothing serious, no worries – just a bleeping annoyance.)

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