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Denizens, there’s no story for the Perfect Football Weekend&#153 – and I’m running short of time – so let’s get to it.

My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets, for the first time in recent memory, are not in the playoffs, so I can’t even do any “one-and_done” jokes.

Sad.

So now it’s off to find a “hah skrewl” (a little Rush lingo, there) replacement.&#160 Fortunately, the old standby is in place – whoever’s playing Sulphur Springs at the moment.

KORRIOTH:&#160 Sulphur Springs?

MERLIN (whispering to Korrioth):&#160 …hometown of Her Doublewideness…?

KORRIOTH:&#160 Ah.

Right now, that’s Wylie East HS, and right now, they’re kicking the Wildcats’ asses all over the lot.&#160 It’s 63-21 as I write this, Wylie East having just scored.&#160 So it looks as if we’ll get one there.

Tomorrow, Bob Stoops and 12th-ranked Oklahoma will take their own potshots at what has become a sorely disappointing (to their fans, anyway) W. Virginia Mountaineers team – one that, at the beginning of the season, had bona fide&#160 visions of a national championship.&#160 I honestly expected WV to be better than this, but it turns out that the Mountaineers don’t have a defense this year.

Vegas has OU as an 11&#189-point favorite – and I think they’ll actually cover this time.

Elsewhere, UMinne-haha will get sacrificed to 14th-ranked Nebraska at Lincoln.&#160 Vegas has Bo Pelini’s bunch as a 20&#189-point home favorite, so Taylor might only play the first couple of quarters, who knows?

Bucky, meanwhile, is going to get its head handed to them by The&#160 Ohio State University, who just happens to be in Camp Randall for the weekend.&#160 The Badgers are a 2&#189-point favorite, but I don’t buy that for a second.&#160 Not with Braxton Miller playing.

Turner Gill’s Liberty U. Flames travel to Virginia for the last game of their season against the Keydets of VMI.&#160 The Keydets are 2-8, so I expect Liberty to not have too&#160 much trouble with them, especially after handling Stony Brook last weekend.

Sunday afternoon, the Dallas Cowgirls are at home to take on the Cleveland Browns.

Cleveland’s 2-8.

A very bad&#160 2-8.

Lose this one, Jason Garrett, and you may as well start packing.

We’re back Monday for the recap.&#160 In the meantime, my question for HDD is…does Bucky stand a chance against OSU?

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Six.

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