Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 7:05
If this guy doesn’t survive, is he a candidate for Darwin?
UPDATE: The SpatulaGoddess (long may she exude massive quantities of hawtness) correctly points out that I screwed up the link.
Anyway, it’s fixed.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 21:02
Talk about a fait accompli.
The Repulican Party – aka the Party of Stoopid – is committing slow suicide. And there seems to be nothing conservatives can do about it but watch in stunned disbelief as the (hack, spit) moderates and liberals take the party down a path of destruction.
McZhamesty won Californication, New Jackshit (Joisey), New Yorkshire, Connecticut
That was about as far as I got last night on the Super Tuesday analysis before the Chick Chasing bug caught up with me again (translation: I got a call from a cute señorita). So I’d left that analysis for tonight.
That…was before Mormonboy made it a moot point. It leaves McZhamnesty and the Huckaclown as the only two left in the GOP race (no, Twoofers, I’m not including your favorite nutjob, because he has fewer delegates than I have fingers & toes) – and I think you can expect the Huckster to drop out Any Day Now. To be followed shortly by an announcement by McLame naming Huckabozo as his running mate.
McRINO, having all but won the nomination outright, is now trying to say all the right things to us conservatives.
“I know I have a responsibility, if I am, as I hope to be, the Republican nominee for president, to unite the party and prepare for the great contest in November,” the Arizona senator told the activists gathered in a Washington hotel.
“And I am acutely aware that I cannot succeed in that endeavor, nor can our party prevail over the challenge we will face from either Senator Clinton or Senator Obama, without the support of dedicated conservatives,” he said.
Oh, so let me get this straight: You teamed up with Teddy the Red-Nosed Senator and advocated zhamnesty for 20,000,000
undocumented immigrants guest workers ILLEGAL ALIENS – advocacy that flies squarely in the face of what we want. You pissed on our rights guaranteed to us by Article I of the Bill of Rights when you and Widdle Russie SlimeMold passed that POS known as “campaign finance reform”. You teamed up with Joey Lieberman to try and shove an American version of the bullshit Kyoto protocols down our throats. You criticized one of President Bush’s Supreme Court nominees, Samuel Alito, as being “too conservative”. You’ve ripped Christans as being “agents of intolerance”. You’ve given Christians and conservatives the back of your hand at every fucking turn.
And now you want our support.
Congratulations on your epiphany, McDumbfuck. You’ve realized that you’re not going to win shit without us, and now you’re trying your damnedest to put the sincerest of frozen smiles on your woefully arrogant mug in a pathetic, half-assed attempt to suck up to us.
Well. Good luck with all that.
Problem is, McFuckhead, we’ve been watching your tired act now for roughly 20 or 25 years. We conservatives are well aware what you think of us. We’ve heard your words, and seen your actions.
And now you want our support.
I. Don’t. Fucking. Think. So.
Best of luck to you, Mr. Manchurian Candidate McRINO. You’re gonna need it.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 21:19
In my continuing grousing about the Stupor Bowl, My Infamous Wrath will now be turned on Roger
Goodfella Goodell and the rest of the NFL goon squad.
Now they’re trying to tell churches that they can’t have Super Bowl watching parties.
Actually, I’d just once like to see the big, bad-assed NFL bully just try to enforce something like that. They’re essentially saying that a church can’t have a party where a game just happens to be on the tube – same as if I were to have a few dozen people over to watch a game on my TV. (And I really dare the No Fun League to come tell me I can’t have my friends over to watch the Super Bowl – if you do it, Goodfella, make sure you bring a bodybag. Just sayin’.)
The NFL bans public exhibitions of its games on TV sets or screens larger than 55 inches because smaller sets limit the audience size. The section of federal copyright law giving the NFL protection over the content of its programming exempts sports bars, spokesman Brian McCarthy said.
Yeah, well – if the NFL has the audacity to broadcast the game on public, non-subscription, non-pay-per-view airwaves, they don’t really have much of a leg on which to stand, y’know?
Seriously. I’d love to see them try to enforce this. And if I were that church, I think I’d tell the NFL to go to…well, you get the idea.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 22:46
I think that, if something – anything – were to happen to the fucking hellhole known as New Jackshit City…something that happened to take Widdle Mikey
Shitstain Strachan, Brandi Jackoff and the rest of the New York Football Douchebags along with it – I’d be inclined to forgive the perps.
Congratulations, New England Pansy-asses. You just lost to a piss-poor, woefully inferior football team.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant @ 12:56
Don’t have time to do much right now, Denizens – weekend chores are a beast again, plus I have to go to the store and get stuff for the Stupor Bowl tomorrow.
As much as it’s killing me to admit it, I’m going to pull for the Pansies over the Douchebags tomorrow. Yeah, they both beat the Cowboys – but the Doucheweenies cost the C’boys a chance for greatness this year, then had to have zebra help to beat the Pack.
I still want to analyze the rest of Shrubya’s giveaway speech (aka the State of the Union Show), plus there are a couple of stories upon which I’ve stumbled that are just begging for a fisking.
As always, watch this space.