Local time where you're at. ("Where you're at"?)

Oh, I’m ever-so-sure you did, Shari baby.  How better to enhance and magnify the world-renowned Six Flags Experience™ than by having potentially two-thirds of the customers good & lathered up, hm?  I know I’ve always wanted to visit the universally-famous amusement park and take in the aroma of cotton candy, hot dogs & lemonade mixed in with that wonderful  stench of beer.

(Not to mention the resulting Rancid Reek O’ Retch-ery™ when someone who’s tipped a few too many tries to ride the Shock Wave, but we’ll try not to think about that, will we?)

Yeah, I’m sure’s Hell™ convinced, alrighty. 

“Our sister park in San Antonio as well as other entertainment venues throughout the state of Texas have proven that you can serve beer – and in some cases other mixed beverages – and still provide a family-friendly atmosphere,” she said.

I call bullshit.  For starters, I’d like to see just how many times your police “security personnel” were called in to give a little “attitude adjustment” to a someone soused up on Sam Adams.  How many times the park gendarmes  had to deal with a pickled patron who’d pounded one too many Pabsts.

Unless you’d like to show me  those spreadsheets, Shari baby, I think I’ll remain a little dubious about your so-called “family-friendly” bullshit, mkay?

Glad we could clear that up.

Those opposed to beer sales said mixing alcohol with an environment filled with children was a bad idea and could lead to more injuries inside the park and more drunken driving accidents on nearby roads.

Oh, “could”, my lily-white cracker ass.  This half-assed decision by the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission absolutely will  lead to more of that.  Count on it.

Incidentally, you might be interested in knowing that this is the same TABC that a couple weeks ago stripped Silver City Caberet in Dallas (pun definitely intended) of its liquor license.

The state of Texas is declaring victory over what it calls one of the most problematic topless clubs in the state.

Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission agents have stripped Silver City Cabaret in Dallas of its license to serve alcohol after trying for five years.

So, essentially, what you’ve got is that a bunch of fuckheaded, loose-assed dorkwads in Austin say that you can’t have beer at an adults-only strip club, but you can have beer in front of the kiddies at Six Flags.

Nice.  Real fuckin’ nice.