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Couldn’t someone just once&#160 have knocked the shit out of Jordan Shitty Shipley?&#160 Especially during that punt return?

Dallas 16, Cincinnati 7

It was the expected yawnfest.&#160 Both Tony Romo & Carson Palmer played very little, and it was basically a game of who had the better scrubs.&#160 Those of the C’boys outlasted those of the B’gals – and I say “outlasted” because who knows what would have happened had the game gone an extra five minutes.

The red-zone offense still needs mondo work.&#160 And Jason Garrett needs to remember how the old C’boys did things once they got inside the five.&#160 IOW, you don’t pass three straight times, if at all.&#160 This is supposed to be a better line than last year’s edition, and one of the best Dallas lines all-time – shove it up the defense’s ass.&#160 C’mon, Jason, use that Princeton-educated brain of yours and get a clue.

Defensively, the secondary is still a work in progress, and had Cincy’s first unit gotten to stay in there a little longer…well…

David Buehler is not the answer at kicker.&#160 I’m gonna go out on a limb and state that right now.&#160 He hit three – from in close – and missed one.&#160 But the one wasn’t anywhere within the same zip code of the goalposts.

I’d be more comfortable with TCU’s Ross Evans out there – and y’all kinda know my opinion on that.

A pick-six by a linebacker who might be a candidate for the taxi squad practice squad accounted for the rest of Dallas’ points. And the aforementioned T-sip pansy-ass, Shipley (the third-year man now with his second pro team, IMO), took a punt at the end of the game and ran it back to the 2, setting up Cincy’s only TD.&#160 I can’t wait ’til the first time Troy Polamalu draws a bead.&#160 So help me Cthulu, I’m gonna post the video on that.

First-round All-Diva team candidate Dez Bryant has a bum ankle and won’t play this preseason, so it’ll be tough to coronate him as The Answer To Everything&#153 until at least the NY Football Douchebags game.&#160 Defensive end Marcus Spears is also out with a bad wheel at the moment.

Third tight end John Phillips tweaked his knee suffered a likely torn ACL and could miss the year.&#160 That would hurt – he’s been tons more reliable than Martellus Bennett (who’s also injured right now).&#160 Potential WR/KR Titus Ryan broke his thumb in the game, as well.&#160 Other than that, the ‘Boys came out relatively healthy.

They’ll need to be, because the next game is here Thursday against “Da Raaaaaiduhhhhhhs” of Oakland.&#160 Which is when the PFW will return.


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